LS Men are Turning Me Off Men

[Mad Max]

Eh, at times the women on LS can turn men off. I've seen posts that literally made me go "WTF ?".

[GooseChaser]

Well, everyone's different, and in a place like this there will surely be people who post things that will turn you off. Others will be different. =]

[InceptorsRule]

Where's the "love" in allowing oneself to become a giant fatass once in a relationship?

 

Lois would never say that to Peter Griffin.

[GooseChaser]

If someone does that to themself, they're primarily hurting themselves by letting their health go. That's the big concern. If their partner doesn't mind, it could work out, I suppose.

[naya1]

ugh i know how u feel op.

when i first came here i expected something differently, but when i read some of their post it seems their expectations of women/relationships are even higher, if not, ridiculously higher than men i meet in general. perhaps the men i met arent as honest because they cant tell it to my face and ls guys go all out (aka hold nothing back) because they are protected by the privacy and anonymity of the internet?

 

dont lose hope there are still guys out there who i have met online who arent as..u know..shallow-ish.

 

to think ur in a love forum posting and wallowing ..giggle.

 

i do agree that most men look and focus at how a woman looks and not prioritize what she is really as a person..but this isnt something we expect that goes rampant from men posting on a love forum. well i guess its just me. but their standards are way too high .. i dont get it. ive met and seen handsome and eligible guys who dont have extreme hang ups and issues that are more capable.

 

btw sorry if my english blows. i havent had sleep and watching nurse jackie again.

 

edit

[i erased this whole block, its too mean..and i cant live with it.]

edit

 

just read how inceptor talks to women, disgusting. i wonder what he looks like.

Edited September 11, 2010 by naya1

[InceptorsRule]

just read how inceptor talks to women, disgusting. i wonder what he looks like.

I talk to women the exact same way as I talk to men: truthfully.

 

Sorry to hear that you find the truth to be disgusting but then a lot of people who post on these boards seem to have the same relationship with the truth--they regard it as disgusting and want to flee from it.

 

I notice you don't point out anything in particular I've said in this thread (or anywhere else) that is "wrong" or misguided or even "disgusting."

 

I'll give you a little more "truth" and hope you don't find it "disgusting"--YOUR post was all about how it's MEN who are supposedly over concerned with a WOMAN'S appearance.

 

Yet the way you responded/attacked me, an ad hominem attack, is aimed DIRECTLY AT MY [PRESUMABLY "DISGUSTING"] PHYSICAL APPEARANCE.

 

Making you a complete hypocrite.

 

Another truth, and I don't care if you feel it to be "disgusting." It's a truth about yourself, and if you find a truth about yourself to be "disgusting"...well...you know what they say...don't talk the talk etc etc.

[theBrokenMuse]

Sorry to hear that you find the truth to be disgusting but then a lot of people who post on these boards seem to have the same relationship with the truth--they regard it as disgusting and want to flee from it.

 

Well, some truth is pretty freaking disgusting in and of itself - let's not conflate the content of any given truth into something that should be taken as good simply due to the fact that it is not being misrepresented.

[Knittress]

I'll tell you what - I was sitting in a coffeeshop the other night 'working' (and spending too much time LS, per usual), and this dour-faced, sloppily-dressed guy came in. He hovered and kept trying to make eye contact while I pretended to be engrossed in whatever. (Made me nervous) Then he got out his flip phone and whined to someone on the other end about how fickle women are and how he can't imagine ever being willing to marry one of them, 'no matter how cute they are' (said while eyeing a 20 year old walking through the door).

 

And then I thought, "Oh!" and felt relieved.

There was more mutual attraction between me and the gaggle of gay guys playing scrabble, and am COOL with that. So I don't look entirely conventional. Whatever. Sour grapes, man.

Edited September 11, 2010 by Knittress

[InceptorsRule]

I'll tell you what - I was sitting in a coffeeshop the other night 'working' (and spending too much time LS, per usual), and this dour-faced, sloppily-dressed guy came in. He hovered and kept trying to make eye contact while I pretended to be engrossed in whatever. (Made me nervous) Then he got out his flip phone and whined to someone on the other end about how fickle women are and how he can't imagine ever being willing to marry one of them, 'no matter how cute they are' (said while eyeing a 20 year old walking through the door).

 

And then I thought, "Oh!" and felt relieved.

There was more mutual attraction between me and the gaggle of gay guys playing scrabble, and I'm am COOL with that. So I don't look entirely conventional. Whatever. Sour grapes, man.

 

 

LOL at this. A complete stranger is talking to someone else on the phone, you're listening in, and everything has to be about you.

 

Believe it or not you are not the center of attention of everyone else's universe.

 

Although an awful lot of people seem to think about the world in a similar way as you've expressed in your post.

[Billie The Puppet]

Call me stupid, naive, old-fashioned, whatever you like, but having read the posts by so many men on LS for a while now is starting to put me off men. Honestly, I am so disappointed and disheartened by so many posts on this forum and I'm starting to think it is affecting my view of men in general.

 

My opinion on the general feel from mens' comments on so may posts is:

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't look like she's still 20 at 45, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend gains 5lbs, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't perform oral daily, anal, threesomes, and any other porn fantasy I have, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend gets "too" emotional, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't follow every sexual fad presented by the media, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't want to have sex at least once day, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

It's always about sex, sex, sex. I truly am finding that this forum should be renamed Sexshack since love almost is never in the equation to any relationship problem. Or more aptly, love = sex and nothing more.

 

I wonder where kindness, goodness of heart, sincerity, honesty, loyalty, sticking with your partner during bad times, etc have gone. Almost every day there is someone posting about a problem in their relationship and almost always the majority of the answers has to do with the woman not being a good enough "sex goddess." I am truly starting to wonder if men see women as anything more than tools for their sex life. It is so rare to read about a man who appreciates his partner for being there with him, for putting up with his bad habits, for raising their children, for financially supporting their family as much as he is, for sticking with him during job losses, financial difficulties, illness, etc.

 

I guess I needed to vent tonight after reading post after post about how all problems in a R can be solved by the woman looking after her man's sexual needs. When is it all right for a woman's needs (sexual, emotional, etc) to be looked after??

 

There are men on LS that I have a lot of respect for after reading their posts, that goes without saying, but there are also so many more who make me want to give up on men period. Makes me also question why so many of them can't keep a R going if the only answer to life and love is sex. I know that not all men are so shallow and selfish but some nights after spending too much time reading posts (my own fault) it makes me start to wonder if there are any good men left on the planet!

 

End of rant - let the backlash begin!

 

Yet enter the breaks and break up sections or second chances and you'll notice it's mostly men with Broken hearts posting. Myself included and the funny thing is everything you listed as a Man I would not do.

 

- I was attracted to my EX's personality and she was out of my normal type (We are in our 20's so I can't comment but I know myself enough that I wouldn't be like that)

- I wouldn't leave if pounds are gained/loss as long as I am still attracted to her personality I mean if you are talking 200lbs gained things may be wrong and chances are I won't be attracted to her before she would even be able to gain that much because that will effect her personality in itself.

- I am a man and obviously like sex but I will not make my partner do anything she doesn't want to do my Ex didn't like to finish Oral so I never let her, She didn't like anal so I never went that way (Ever in life actually) though for some reason my ex thought I wanted too

- I may be a rare man but for me it wasn't always about SEX although I usually climaxed first duh easier for guys there were times where she would be done and not want to continue so I had to either have blue balls or go relieve myself.

- Personally to me I can live with less sex as I love the companionship more but maybe thats because I am newly single and miss that from my Ex.

- I would actually talk and cuddle with my ex after instead of rolling over and falling asleep etc.

[Knittress]

::raised eyebrow::

How good were you at those reading comprehension tests given in high school? Though I do think it's telling that a when a woman describes a man who's behaving in a 'creepy,' 'gross,' 'low-brow,' 'whiny' manner, and takes care to illustrate this instead of just throwing out adjectives, you interpret her as being something of a diva.

Couldn't be further from the truth, guy.

[InceptorsRule]

Well, some truth is pretty freaking disgusting in and of itself - let's not conflate the content of any given truth into something that should be taken as good simply due to the fact that it is not being misrepresented.

 

 

Pretty abstract comment but since you addressed it to me--in the context of THIS thread the OP made a very broad generalization about all the bitter men supposedly posting at LS.

 

I then rummaged through some of her old posts and found the beauty from last year that I posted, quite clearly showing that it is OP WHO IS BITTER TOWARDS MEN. And not because of anything at LS, but because of her pre-existing life situation which caused her to post at LS in the first place.

 

So IOW she's a very bitter woman, bitter towards men, and the way she chose to express that was by accusing MEN, essentially "all men at LS," of the very BITTERNESS that she herself harbors AGAINST MEN.

 

That's the truth, it's got to be, because I simply quoted the OP's own prior post from last year, in which she goes on and on about her very bitter feelings towards men.

 

In response to that I got an entirely gratuitous attack from "nayla" in which she accuses me of being "disgusting" after ranting on about how men are overly concerned with a woman's looks...then "nayla" tops off her attack post by saying "I wonder what you look like" thus proving herself to be a total hypocrite.

 

So no maybe truth isn't 100% valuable in all situations but it is so often lacking hereabouts that it doesn't make much sense to underemphasize the need for it.

[InceptorsRule]

::raised eyebrow::

How good were you at those reading comprehension tests given in high school? Though I do think it's telling that a when a woman describes a man who's behaving in a 'creepy,' 'gross,' 'low-brow,' 'whiny' manner, and takes care to illustrate this instead of just throwing out adjectives, you interpret her as being something of a diva.

Couldn't be further from the truth, guy.

 

 

Some guy walked into a diner where she was working on her laptop. She wanted, craved attention. Any glance in her direction has to be the guy mentally undressing her, right? LOL. She was expecting, hoping the creepy guy would hit on her, so she could tell him off??? It would still be flattering to her ego, obviously.

 

But no....the guy was probably glancing at her because she had muffin crumbs on her chin or something. He took his phone call and was talking about something/someone else entirely. He ignored her. In fact not only did he ignore her, he dissed her by directing his attention to a 20 year old hottie. Why how dare he! Why I'll show him!!!! I'll post at LS about what a creep he is...for looking at a 20 year old hottie instead of ME.

 

ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME.

 

LOL.

 

I don't listen to other people's phone calls if at all possible and if I happen to overhear them in a restaurant I don't imagine that the guy on the phone is fantasizing about having sex with me. YMMV.

[Knittress]

Some guy walked into a diner where she was working on her laptop. She wanted, craved attention. Any glance in her direction has to be the guy mentally undressing her, right? LOL. She was expecting, hoping the creepy guy would hit on her, so she could tell him off??? It would still be flattering to her ego, obviously.

 

But no....the guy was probably glancing at her because she had muffin crumbs on her chin or something. He took his phone call and was talking about something/someone else entirely. He ignored her. In fact not only did he ignore her, he dissed her by directing his attention to a 20 year old hottie. Why how dare he! Why I'll show him!!!! I'll post at LS about what a creep he is...for looking at a 20 year old hottie instead of ME.

 

ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME.

 

LOL.

 

I don't listen to other people's phone calls if at all possible and if I happen to overhear them in a restaurant I don't imagine that the guy on the phone is fantasizing about having sex with me. YMMV.

 

... you don't know what I look like, rage-a-tron. And you evidently have gross misconceptions about the personality of a girl who sits writing in a coffeeshop writing on a Friday night instead of flashing her tits at a bar (not that there's anything wrong with that).

[InceptorsRule]

I usually climaxed first duh easier for guys there were times where she would be done and not want to continue so I had to either have blue balls or go relieve myself

 

 

Dam* the ONLY time that ever happened to me IN MY LIFE (this was about 25 years ago)--talking now about someone with whom I was already in a fully sexual relationship with, not teen dating cr*p-- I literally made the woman (girl I was dating at the time) physically get out of my bed and sleep on the floor.

 

So I don't wonder that you're talking about your "ex." Esp. if this happened multiple times.

[SpanksTheMonkey]

Call me stupid, naive, old-fashioned, whatever you like, but having read the posts by so many men on LS for a while now is starting to put me off men. Honestly, I am so disappointed and disheartened by so many posts on this forum and I'm starting to think it is affecting my view of men in general.

 

My opinion on the general feel from mens' comments on so may posts is:

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't look like she's still 20 at 45, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend gains 5lbs, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't perform oral daily, anal, threesomes, and any other porn fantasy I have, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend gets "too" emotional, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't follow every sexual fad presented by the media, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

If my wife/girlfriend doesn't want to have sex at least once day, it's fair for me to have an affair/leave.

 

It's always about sex, sex, sex. I truly am finding that this forum should be renamed Sexshack since love almost is never in the equation to any relationship problem. Or more aptly, love = sex and nothing more.

 

I wonder where kindness, goodness of heart, sincerity, honesty, loyalty, sticking with your partner during bad times, etc have gone. Almost every day there is someone posting about a problem in their relationship and almost always the majority of the answers has to do with the woman not being a good enough "sex goddess." I am truly starting to wonder if men see women as anything more than tools for their sex life. It is so rare to read about a man who appreciates his partner for being there with him, for putting up with his bad habits, for raising their children, for financially supporting their family as much as he is, for sticking with him during job losses, financial difficulties, illness, etc.

 

I guess I needed to vent tonight after reading post after post about how all problems in a R can be solved by the woman looking after her man's sexual needs. When is it all right for a woman's needs (sexual, emotional, etc) to be looked after??

 

There are men on LS that I have a lot of respect for after reading their posts, that goes without saying, but there are also so many more who make me want to give up on men period. Makes me also question why so many of them can't keep a R going if the only answer to life and love is sex. I know that not all men are so shallow and selfish but some nights after spending too much time reading posts (my own fault) it makes me start to wonder if there are any good men left on the planet!

 

End of rant - let the backlash begin!

 

There are some younger ones posting as of late I believe while I don't compleately agree with everything you say. I do agree they can be blunt, bitter, almost crude at times.

 

But then again women can be as well we just have different ways of showing it and again the age thing comes into play. I've found the ignore botton can work wonders don't give up on all men here!

 

There are some genuine mature fellas that can give excellent unbiased advice thats worth every penny of admission..

 

Heh. Seriously.

I'm halfway convinced if I made eye contact with a man on the street he'd start out with... "height? weight? ::taps at calculator:: BMI 25.4. Move along fatty..."

 

Me too but thats OK it gives me more time at burger king anyways! have you even tried their double whoppers Jesus Christ its better then sex! Eh if you cant fight it work it! I say.. LOL

[InceptorsRule]

... you don't know what I look like, rage-a-tron. And you evidently have gross misconceptions about the personality of a girl who sits writing in a coffeeshop writing on a Friday night instead of flashing her tits at a bar (not that there's anything wrong with that).

 

 

LOL, your looks have something to do with this? How do you figure that? Are you saying you are so spectacularly beautiful that even random strangers in coffee shops can't/shouldn't be able to keep their attention off of you? (I thought you were complaining about getting too much attention? You can't have it both ways, now, can you?)

 

Or, perhaps you are implying that you are not very attractive, and therefore, any guy who pays you attention in such a situation must be considered some kind of "loser"?

 

Listen you admitted that as soon as an attractive twenty year old walked into the place he ignored you, so what exactly is your beef anyway? You were not there to find a date, you were there to work on your laptop.

 

Many people seem to have the similar attitude as you're expressing here--on the one hand you deep down desperately want the attention, on the other hand you're afraid of it/don't think you're deserving of it/don't know how to handle it.

 

People who sit alone in coffeshops, bars, book stores, "pretending" to get work done, are frequently hoping to have a social interaction with someone who might come along.

 

It wouldn't hurt you to acknowledge that you're a human being like everyone else. Including the "creepy guy" who did NOTHING to you which could possibly be considered "offensive" to a reasonable person, other than perhaps in your fervid imagination.

 

Again--the only rude act was possibly your listening in to the guy's phone call.

[Billie The Puppet]

Dam* the ONLY time that ever happened to me IN MY LIFE (this was about 25 years ago)--talking now about someone with whom I was already in a fully sexual relationship with, not teen dating cr*p-- I literally made the woman (girl I was dating at the time) physically get out of my bed and sleep on the floor.

 

So I don't wonder that you're talking about your "ex." Esp. if this happened multiple times.

 

Fresh break up, I am on these forums due to it. And ouch made the woman sleep on the floor wow! Girls finishing before guys is not very often I can say at least 2 times in my former relationship of 3 years.

[Knittress]

If you're talking in a public place you're going to be heard. I'd say he was the 'more impolite' one for yammering in public, if anyone was being rude - which they weren't.

 

I didn't say he did anything offensive, either. I said I found him utterly unattractive in a great many ways and that his attitudes reflected those of a great many of the posts on LS that get me down. So it was something of a relief that perhaps I shouldn't go around comparing myself to what's said on these forums.

 

The guy was eye-balling everyone. As was I. No harm there. There was no 'dissing' or 'giving more attention,' or whatever. Chill out.

[Dazzel]

Sometimes the shallowness of people in general on this forum makes me personally feel as though I have no hope, even with my current boyfriend (who won't have sex with me).

 

I could do with being 50-70 pounds lighter. I know it's a flaw of mine. But sometimes posts her make me feel like utter trash for being overweight and that no male will ever want me. And I'm not even halfway decent for a guy to stomach having sex with me. Just the vibes I get. Yes, I am having a pity party.

[InceptorsRule]

If you're talking in a public place you're going to be heard. I'd say he was the 'more impolite' one for yammering in public, if anyone was being rude - which they weren't.

 

I didn't say he did anything offensive, either. I said I found him utterly unattractive in a great many ways and that his attitudes reflected those of a great many of the posts on LS that get me down. So it was something of a relief that perhaps I shouldn't go around comparing myself to what's said on these forums.

 

The guy was eye-balling everyone. As was I. No harm there. There was no 'dissing' or 'giving more attention,' or whatever. Chill out.

 

 

Well. Thank you for finally being honest about what was actually going on in that coffee shop.

 

If you look back at what you initially posted, however, regarding your coffee shop anecdote, you definitely were trying to characterize this man you were talking about as a creepy, strange, wierdo.

 

But as it turns out, he wasn't doing anything that you weren't doing--"people watching."

 

How did I know you weren't being completely truthful about it, when I wasn't even there? I must be some kind of a magician LOL. (Actually maybe just maybe I have a little bit more "life experience" and have a pretty good intuition when someone might be "exaggerating"?)

[AD1980]

I feel the same way about women being on here..

 

I think theyres allot of entitled pricnesses and allot of even average or medicore ones want the top 5% of Men and wait until they hit a certain age and when they realize they cant get him in their mind "settle" for no reason other then emotionanl and sometime finnancial security..

[alphamale]

don't form your opinions about the opposite sex from what you read here on LS

[SpanksTheMonkey]

but if so, just be sure to tell the preacher not to get in between the two of you and the wedding cake.

 

See now I was actually agreeing with most of what you were saying shockingly up until this point theres just no need to belittle anyone like this is there? So what shes overweight is there a burning need to make a comment like this?

 

This is why overweight people tend to blame others because to some degree others are needlessly crewel and childish and deserve some blame for being so.

 

Its not her weight that made that nasty derogatory comment its you. And by doing so you have just pretty much voided any thing else intelligent you said well done bravo!

[ShadowBlue]

As a man, when you see other men who are either violent, sleazy, notoriously unfaithful, criminals or all of the above yet they're constantly in relationships with women... The desire to be the kind, good hearted, sincere, honest, loyal, etc man kind of wears off.

 

I am making this my signature.