Had a few great dates and he stopped calling, I dont' get it!

[CD111]

As far as background information goes a met a guy when my friends and I went out a few weeks ago. He came over introduced himself to my friends (all girls) and I and told me he was interested in me. He is new to town and sat down with us and we talked the rest of the night. I was pretty impressed with him. We went on three dates that went really well and we had a great time.

 

He went on vacation for a week and called me from there one night. It was a drunk dial on his part. Initially I asked him if he was going to remember any of it and he said he would. He professed to me how great he thought I was (gorgeous, sexy, graceful, sweet....) and how he was ready for a serious substantial relationship that went somewhere and if I was interested in that, I said I was. Again I was pretty impressed, by his honesty and actual ability to tell me what he was looking for....I know it was a drunk dial.

 

The next day he claimed he didn't remember anything from the night before (WHOOHOO). He wanted to know exactly what he said so I have him the run down and told him it really was not that bad and not to stress about it.

 

After he came back I invited him to hang out with my friends and I as sort of an olive branch (to show that the drunk dial professions did not freak me out). He declined and I really haven't heard from him since (5 days). I don't get it?

[Miko]

Wait another few days or a week or so then txt him, just say hi. Just hi, that's it, then it's on him. He might be embarrassed or maybe he's not looking for a relationship but he thinks you think he does since he told you and he doesnt want to have the 'I was drunk I didn't really mean that' conversation. That would be uncomfortable for him dont you think.

[Ilovecake]

It was a drunk phone call, he's obviously freaked out by what he said since he didn't mean it. It's as if someone said I love you to someone they don't love and they say I love you back. You can't take that back so all you can do is run away.

Edited September 9, 2010 by Ilovecake

[a_woman]

I think he is embarrassed and thinks he has come across desperate. I don't think anyone talks about serious relationships while drunk unless they have thought about it sober.

[Cee]

I remember my then boyfriend drunk dialed me many years ago. He was out with friends and martinis were involved. He wasn't a big drinker, mostly a beer guy. Anyway, I tried to get him to say sweet and loving things to me. I was messing with him & thought maybe alcohol was like truth serum. Instead he proceeded to projectile vomit in the toilet while we were still on the phone. Anyway, we laughed about it the next day and it didn't affect our relationship one way or the other.

 

I'd write the moral of the story here if I had one.

[machiavellian]

At this point I think it's safe to say that he didn't really mean what he said while drunk.

 

He either "doesn't remember", or he really doesn't remember, and it seems that you shouldn't have "remembered" either...either that, or he was offended by your "it's not a big deal" response for some reason.

[CD111]

Well I have to agree that he probably wouldn't have said some of those things if he was sober and maybe he meant them or he didn't, but I think his professions definitely made him uncomfortable.

 

If he didn't mean it then I am fine with that; however, I would appreciate a "I didn't mean it conversation". Sure it's uncomfortable; however, it's the truth and "running away" from something like that doesn't say much about a person's character.

 

But to give an update, I did actually hear from him. He asked how I was doing and what I had been up to. He said he had been catching up at work because of his vacation. He does work a ton and I think he is being honest.

 

So I guess we will see how this goes from here.

[machiavellian]

 

So I guess we will see how this goes from here.

Good luck.