lab_brat Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 There’s a guy at my gym – over the past few weeks we’ve been smiling at each other, shyly checking each other out - today he started a conversation. He seems lovely, really friendly and smart and down to earth. He was definitely flirting, asking what I did, how old I was, (turns out, I’m like 3years older than him (23 to 26), which didn’t seem to bother him) acting interested but in a really nice, non-sleazy way. As I was going he asked me how often I came and when I’d be back next, there was a definite vibe there. I think he might ask me out, which is great, he’s gorgeous and seems lovely. Thing is, I’m a single mom – I have a son who is 5. It didn’t come up in conversation today, but I wouldn’t feel right accepting a first date with someone his age without him knowing that (cause he’s young, it very well could freak him out, understandably). Should I actively try to work it into the conversation next time I see him, and how? I’m not exactly good at subtlely directing a conversation. Or should I not try to bring it up unless it comes up organically, or leave it until he definitely asks for my number and then then blurt it out, or what? I don’t want to go out on a first date and then spring it on someone, if having a child is a real deal breaker for someone that’d just be awkward for all concerned. Advice?
catersi Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 just mention it to him next time he decides to talk to you again, and when you say it, just say it aloofly, where you just mention something he did that was cute or something he gave you, and quickly just ask a question after that and you'll see how truly that fact makes him feel immediately in his face.
atlnay Posted September 8, 2010 Posted September 8, 2010 I would be direct as soon as possible, mainly before I like him too much and risk feeling hurt if he passes on dating me longer. 23 is fairly young & yes there is a chance he may bolt, his right/no judgement. But some young guys are cool with dating someone with a child too. I know more than a few that do. As for what to say, save it for face to face & the above approach seems reasonable, casually mention a cute kid thing he's done & gauge your friends reaction. Based on that you'll know how receptive he is. Good luck
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