maiden71 Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 I've been dating this woman for a few months now. She was married for 12 years and has been seperated for close to two years now. I had a big crush on her and was good friends with her back in middle school. She is still waiting for her final divorce date and I know she's really filed as I've seen the letters from her lawyer. Recently an old friend of mine that knows her ex very well called me to tell me that her and her ex were still talking and much more. I confronted her about it and she admitted that they were talking a lot, had had sex a couple of times about two months ago and that she was having second thoughts about leaving the marriage. She left because of a lot of infidelity and bad financial decisions made by him behind her back. He had no interest in reconciling until he found out that she was dating me. She left me without warning for Florida for three days to do some soul searching and came back saying that she had decided that she didn't want to get back with him as she knew he would return to his old ways and I treat her really well. That was a couple of weeks ago. Today I found out that they are still talking, texting and who knows what else behind my back. She says it is because they have a 10 year old daughter together. I can see that but they text and call quite a few times most days. She also goes to his house to drop off and pick up their daughter. This is when they supposedly had sex those few times. He asked her to go to the Florida Keys the other day with him later this month. My friend swears that she was going to go but now isn't since I uncovered their plans. My trust is just really shot and I don't know if this relationship is salvageable anymore. She still swears she wants to be with only me but I've told her until her divorce is final I'll never be able to really trust her. I'm not sure I will even be able to then as these two seem to have some kind of magical bond together.
Rorschach Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 Sounds to me like she doesn't really know what she wants. She probably is honestly having a hard time deciding between her husband and you thats why you keep getting all these mixed signals. If you are committed the relationship the only thing you can do is just wait and see if she makes up her mind in your favor, but thats probably going to be a really long process and will most likely be pretty messy in the meantime. If you aren't totally committed to the relationship the better option is probably to cut your losses and move on, it's unfortunate but it just doesn't sound like she is ready to move on yet as she hasn't even decided if she wants to move on at all.
atlnay Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 Walk away. Two red flags; the fact that he's coming after her since finding out another man is in the picture + she is unable to stop sleeping with her estranged husband are enough to walk away & let them have each other. You'll only be a pawn if you stick around.
Author maiden71 Posted September 11, 2010 Author Posted September 11, 2010 Well I probably don't even really need to say how this turned out.
atlnay Posted September 11, 2010 Posted September 11, 2010 Awwww sorry to hear that :/ not trying to pry, but can you sum up the bad parts?
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