DontStopMeNow Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 I'm in my second year of a graduate program at a university. This girl who went to my high school who I just recently met just started the program, so I sent her a message asking how it was going. We had a nice conversation in person and have mutual friends, so it's not like I'm a stranger. She's been on multiple times and hasn't responded. There were no romantic intentions here. It was a few sentences long with a simple question in it. Are women so paranoid about giving the impression of being interested that they can't respond to friendly messages?
atlnay Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 i wouldnt say it's paranoia as much as it is reality, no "available" or "taken" heterosexual man with a healthy libido wants to be the platonic friend of a woman he finds attractive in some way. For what? Some women get that and dont want to lead someone on they know they dont want to date.
Star Gazer Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 Are women so paranoid about giving the impression of being interested that they can't respond to friendly messages? You're posting this in the "dating" forum for a reason, right? You're sending the message to give them the impression that you're interested in dating them. Responding might give you the same impression.
Author DontStopMeNow Posted September 2, 2010 Author Posted September 2, 2010 You're posting this in the "dating" forum for a reason, right? You're sending the message to give them the impression that you're interested in dating them. Responding might give you the same impression. I'm not interested in dating her. I'm posting here because there are single women in the dating game who can give some insight into the motivations behind things like this. You can easily get the message across you aren't interested in the second or third message if it gets that far if you have to. Completely ignoring it is horribly rude IMO.
Confusedalways Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 Oh, god. This type of crap always gets me in trouble (more so via text). Legitimately, I usually get texts or messages and have a real, honest desire to respond. But, I'm busy right this second so I'll do it later. Oops, later becomes the next day, and a day turns into 2 days and 3 days and by then , forget it, you can't answer now because you look stupid. Or she could be avoiding you. Doubt it, being that you had a nice convo IRL.
meerkat stew Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 I have platonic friendships and client relationships with many women. They are almost universally awful at basic manners, returning calls, sticking to appointments, plans and schedules, much worse than men. Ironically, the few busiest women I know with the most responsibility and least free time don't seem to have this problem. The ones with problems seem to be able to function fine at work or home, and to keep a schedule where doctors or beauty are concerned. It is a conundrum. When the ones who are clients inconvenience me due to this characteristic, I simply charge them more.
that girl Posted September 2, 2010 Posted September 2, 2010 How is it going? Is a vague and awkward question to respond to by email. I don't even understand why you emailed her to begin with. But she probably just forgot about it. Considering it doesn't seem to be time sensitive or important, I don't think you really have cause to be upset.
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