lily1985 Posted August 28, 2010 Posted August 28, 2010 I haven't really used the net before for advice, but I need objective opinions on this situation. I met a guy 2 months ago at a summer resort. we had sex 3 hours after meeting each other (something I have never done before....no drinking was involved). the next day, early in the morning, he calls and invites me out that night. the following night i have dinner with his entire family. he leaves to go home a week earlier than i do..and already he is paranoid about me going out to clubs at night. we speak every single night. i visit him at his home a week after meeting each other. i spend 4 days at his house with his parents. a week later he comes visit me at my home and meets my parents. we speak 4,5x a day. im going away to school in a week and we will be a 2 hr plane ride away from each other..its only been 2 months of knowing each other but it has been extremely accelerated. he has 5 more yrs of school left. im 24 he is 22. how do i proceed with this guy?
meerkat stew Posted August 28, 2010 Posted August 28, 2010 Have you agreed to date exclusively? actually discussed it? If not, decide if that is what you want and have the talk. If not, slow way down and date other men, or at least get out socializing once or twice a week. Try not to make the relationship the entire focus of your social life. Get in touch and catch up with old friends and strengthen your family relationships and focus on your studies. Cultivate school activities eve though it sounds like you are close to graduating. Create a relationship that is part of your life, not the centerpiece of it. The situation you are describing can be healthy or unhealthy, depends on how you position it in your life. LDRs are extremely difficult to carry on successfully. In your shoes would continue to see each other non-exclusively as long as possible. If after several months of this type of arrangement you both still feel strongly, you might consider plans to move closer to where he is at school.
Author lily1985 Posted August 28, 2010 Author Posted August 28, 2010 well thats the thing im confused about. because everyone in his life (including his boss at work) refers to me as the girlfriend...but then when i say that i am going out tonight he will respond with this weird comment such as: "ahhhhh i see. well you can do want you in life" but then he tells me EVERY time he goes out and calls me as soon as he is back home whether its 1 am or 3. he will also say things like "if it goes great, if it doesnt work, it's fine" in regards to our dating/relationship/whatever this is. i dont get it
meerkat stew Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 Once more, you two need to communicate directly about what your relationship is and where you want it to go. Until you do this, the chance of misunderstandings and confusion looms and will eventually sour the relationship.
Sabali Posted August 29, 2010 Posted August 29, 2010 An insanely accelerated romance complicated by distance. To top it off like a cherry, "already he is paranoid about me going out to clubs at night." How do you proceed? Insanely fast relationship starts along with distance and paranoia of you going out is the perfect recipe for... Awww but you are probably all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed about this one so I won't spoil the ending for you... I mean, the "forever after" of this one for you.
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