Dating Apprehensions

[FallenAngel84]

I got out of a 5 year relationship about a month ago. To say it was a long time coming would be an understatement. I never knew how to break it to my ex boyfriend, but when I did, I felt a huge feeling of relief. I was unhappy in that relationship for a good couple of years.

 

A couple weeks after the fact, I started dating someone new. I have known this guy for about 6 months but we never made a move until I was single.

 

We had a great first date and have gone out a few times since then. I really like him, I think we have potential and we have fun together which is already a huge plus and I feel like I now know what was missing in my 5 year relationship. The only thing is, I am almost afraid to keep dating this new guy because I'm afraid things will end how they did with my last. My ex boyfriend was a great guy, very trustworthy and loyal, but it feels like in the end, we weren't meant to be and were more or less good friends than anything else. I guess I'm afraid of that happening again. Is this feeling normal? How should I reassure myself that these are two totally different people and I shouldn't think negative and compare this potential new relationship to my last one that ended the way it ended? That's my whole thing... I need to look on the positive side but I'm always afraid to because I don't want to be let down.

 

 

Ideas?

 

Thanks in advance!

Edited August 21, 2010 by FallenAngel84

[bobdole]

You just have to put it behind you.. Its natural human behavior to fear something unpleasant happening again. I still fear finding my next girlfriend and her breaking my trust, but you gotta try...

[You Go Girl]

All outcomes are possible. Remember that yes, he's not the same guy, so don't project anything onto him. That's the kiss of death, and you recognize that already.

Apprehensive? Sure! A little cold feet in the trust dept.? Well why should you trust blindly?

People earn trust, just as they earn your love. It holds true for anybody in your future.

Just keep your radar up. Don't go in blindly, don't go in with preconceived notions.

Congrats on your new adventure!

[EYECANDY000]

5 years is a long time to be with someone.. I think you need to give your self some time to be single for a while. Dating someone right after a break up isnt the best thing to do. Because the first thing yo will do is compare that person to your ex. Since you are dating so soon start off with an open mind. Dont enter a relationship with negativity.. .

[guy.lepage]

The only thing is, I am almost afraid to keep dating this new guy because I'm afraid things will end how they did with my last.

 

You're afraid of hurting someone and getting hurt again, which is totally understandable.

 

Chances are, your new relationship will end up just like the previous one. People fall in and out of love every second, that is just part of life.

 

If you accept that reality (that all relationship eventually come to an end), enjoy the present moment for what it is and hope that happiness will last. That's all you can do.