He appeared... again, and I can't believe my response

[lullaby]

So... my ex contacted me... again. We have been having LC and I was ok with it but due to his poor behavior regarding my grandpa situation, I have decided to take a new approach and not wait anything more from him so when he text last Tuesday, I didn't reply and now... he appears.

 

He sent a text yesterday night, and I quote: "Hello star! I saw your video from the show on youtube. I really liked it. We didn't meet again, what happened? Are you OK?"

 

I slept on the thought of answering, because of the LC thing, and not replying was some sort of 'reply' either way, he would know I was playing a role given our situation and he would reach out to me again and again, so this is what I responded today and I can't believe I could finally answer what I felt and not what I thought would be better to continue being in good terms:

"I'm glad you liked it. I'm fine. True, we haven't met. And honestly? I needed you, I was having a hard time with a loss, but I didn't even want to ask from you what you obviously don't feel like offering. Bye"

 

Whether NC is right or wrong, that's not the point, it's the fact that I was able to answer that and not some silly text covering up what I was really feeling and I take it as a change. It's a different approach and I hope I can maintain this distance and not let him fool me again.

 

OK. Back to studying. I'll appreciate your insights.

[marigo]

Hey Lull,

 

Its been a while!! I think the reason you were able to be completely honest is the fact that you're at the point where you almost feel emotionally numb. This guy has hurt you over and over that the pain has become too much and you just feel like "you dont care" what you say to him anymore. Its hard to explain really. But recently that's how i feel about my ex too. As sad as i am that he hasnt contacted me, i feel like im at the point where if he does, i dont really care anymore. What did your ex reply to that?? I am proud of you btw!!!