Am I worrying over nothing?

[tinkerz1981]

Hi all,

 

I've recently entered the world of Internet dating and I've found someone I REALLY like. For the past few weeks we've been texting each other a lot and talking on MSN for hours and hours. He seems very in to me and we both can't believe our luck in finding each other.

 

But now the paranoia kicks in. I haven't head from him in 4 days and I'm driving myself mad about it. The longest we went without texting was 2/3 days and it turned out he was just busy. My gut tells me I'm worrying over nothing but I can't help thinking he's met someone else... He's no longer on my Facebook (although I may have caused this whilst using my glitchy pc - or is that just wishful thinking?)

I've text him three times and now refuse to text again. I basically just want to ask you opinions? I'm new to dating and don't understand if this is completely normal or wether he's trying to phase me out

 

Thanks guys

x

[Raderick]

Possibly defriending him told him you were not interested. Then again, why did you Facebook friend him in the first place?

[cantthinkofanameehhh]

Alright first never text him first ... i will be dead honest when i say it sould never be that way if its ever gonna work he will text u first... if he isnt answering in 4 days wait 6 more days without even know he exists and if he dosnt contact u he is not worth it. keep talking to other guys as well .. considering this is a relationship online people dont always have phones or computers with them 24/7 so 4 days isnt odd

 

 

For facebook thing it is possible wenever he is offline he dosnt appear as a friend to anyone thats possible . i also have 3 friends glitched who only are on friends list when there online

 

If u take any from this its dont text a guy first . and if you do jus say hey. no smiles or anything and only once every 3 days at least if you have to

[tinkerz1981]

Possibly defriending him told him you were not interested. Then again, why did you Facebook friend him in the first place?

 

 

Well after the defriend I sent him a jokey message through fbk asking why he'd removed me. Haha that statement sounds well clingy but I made sure the message was relaxed....

 

(He asked to friend me... Why? Is friending someone a bit of a faux pas?)

[tinkerz1981]

Alright first never text him first ... i will be dead honest when i say it sould never be that way if its ever gonna work he will text u first... if he isnt answering in 4 days wait 6 more days without even know he exists and if he dosnt contact u he is not worth it. keep talking to other guys as well .. considering this is a relationship online people dont always have phones or computers with them 24/7 so 4 days isnt odd

 

 

For facebook thing it is possible wenever he is offline he dosnt appear as a friend to anyone thats possible . i also have 3 friends glitched who only are on friends list when there online

 

If u take any from this its dont text a guy first . and if you do jus say hey. no smiles or anything and only once every 3 days at least if you have to

 

Thank you! You've made me feel loads better. And you might be right about that glitch because the other day I got access to his wall briefly... Plus I could only actually find him to 'add him' when he was online.

I'm taking on board your advice about texting too, it was just he was initiating all the texting so I just with the flow. But yeah, message understood, in future less texting.

[cantthinkofanameehhh]

Well after the defriend I sent him a jokey message through fbk asking why he'd removed me. Haha that statement sounds well clingy but I made sure the message was relaxed....

 

(He asked to friend me... Why? Is friending someone a bit of a faux pas?)

im sorry but again the sad truth is to a guy theres no way to make that sound relaxed u need to regain urself by makeing him want u more then u want him and this means he must text u first befor u can even start doing this..

 

 

 

 

Dont stick with one guy date around

[Raderick]

Well after the defriend I sent him a jokey message through fbk asking why he'd removed me. Haha that statement sounds well clingy but I made sure the message was relaxed....

 

(He asked to friend me... Why? Is friending someone a bit of a faux pas?)

 

Still, I think the damage was already done.

[tinkerz1981]

im sorry but again the sad truth is to a guy theres no way to make that sound relaxed u need to regain urself by makeing him want u more then u want him and this means he must text u first befor u can even start doing this..

 

Yeah I'm just kind of realising that fbk message was a ridiculous idea. I thought I was being cute but to someone else I guess I will have seemed clingy and a bit of a desperado. Kicking myself now for not playing it cooler. BUT at least now I know where I've been going wrong...

[cantthinkofanameehhh]

Dont kick urself in the ass... if he finds that a flaw hes a jackass for you and u dont deserve him in first place. when so called flaws dont effect someones looks on you in any way shape or form thats when u have something to chace and it happens to everyone eventually . unfortunately internet dateing is different u cant text first to much or anything like i alrdy said cause the person dosnt know the actual u and cant understand it or accept it

[Eeyore79]

There are no FB glitches where you can accidentally see someone's private wall, or where they vanish from your friend list. You're either their friend, or you're not. Either he's defriended you, or you've accidentally defriended him.

 

If you've defriended him, a guy who cared about you would text and ask why, not just stop texting you. If he's not contacting you, he's lost interest... although if he has just stopped contacting you then he's really rude and you don't want that kind of guy anyway. A decent guy would break things off if he changed his mind, not just leave you hanging.

 

Even if he is just busy, do you really want the kind of guy who is impolite and uncaring enough to just cease contact for days on end because he's busy? A text only takes a minute; you can't tell me he's unable to spare 60 seconds, however busy he is. Such behaviour doesn't bode well for his ability to behave properly in a relationship.

 

Do yourself a favour and just ask him outright what's going on. I would basically text and say that from his lack of contact you've assumed he doesn't want to continue, so could he just confirm that so you can move on, and if he doesn't reply you'll assume that he doesn't want to talk any more. Even better - stop texting and call him! Texts are easier to ignore than a phonecall.

[cantthinkofanameehhh]

There are no FB glitches where you can accidentally see someone's private wall, or where they vanish from your friend list. You're either their friend, or you're not. Either he's defriended you, or you've accidentally defriended him.

 

If you've defriended him, a guy who cared about you would text and ask why, not just stop texting you. If he's not contacting you, he's lost interest... although if he has just stopped contacting you then he's really rude and you don't want that kind of guy anyway. A decent guy would break things off if he changed his mind, not just leave you hanging.

 

Even if he is just busy, do you really want the kind of guy who is impolite and uncaring enough to just cease contact for days on end because he's busy? A text only takes a minute; you can't tell me he's unable to spare 60 seconds, however busy he is. Such behaviour doesn't bode well for his ability to behave properly in a relationship.

 

Do yourself a favour and just ask him outright what's going on. I would basically text and say that from his lack of contact you've assumed he doesn't want to continue, so could he just confirm that so you can move on, and if he doesn't reply you'll assume that he doesn't want to talk any more. Even better - stop texting and call him! Texts are easier to ignore than a phonecall.

 

 

thats not true you can set urself so no one sees u unless your online , thats why some days u have lets 529 friends and others 530 without accepting anytjing

[ViciousViolet]

You have not heard from him in 4 days...texted him 3 times and sent a FB message. He's moved on. I understand that you two were just in the "getting to know you" phase, but by not taking a second to respond to at least one text tells me that he's no longer interested. Move on. Sorry.

[kalikula]

He defriended you, he sounds like a jerk... Sorry to say...