BookerT Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 So I read all the threads here and it's pretty depressing stuff. But the thing is, reality and what people hope for, or think is right is very different. Recently I was talking to a female friend who cheated on her boyfriend, and to sum it up the guy just wasn't good enough for her. He was friggin boring. She cheated because she was looking for something better. Then I look at people that fall out of love all the time, the high divorce rate, and the games people play. I got to say, although we try to live up to what's right, and high ideals. The majority of people are still far more driven by animal instincts than what we know to be right or wrong, and human beings are designed for serial monogamy if not polygamy. Women gravitate to the stronger males, stronger males sleep around with more women than weaker males. We can try to fight it, but it'll get the better of many of us sooner or later. At the end of the day only about 10% of people will find their happily ever after.
Pyro Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Guys need to stop thinking with their dicks and women need to be honest and break up with the guy before getting with another.....generally speaking of course. I don't understand it but according to the OP I fall in the 10%.
Author BookerT Posted August 10, 2010 Author Posted August 10, 2010 Guys need to stop thinking with their dicks and women need to be honest and break up with the guy before getting with another.....generally speaking of course. I don't understand it but according to the OP I fall in the 10%. Lol, why generally speaking of couse? In terms of the happily ever after situation, let me clarify. The vast majority of people can have healthy relationships for a few years, because pair bonding creates the attraction. After the pair bonding hormones wear off it naturally gets boring, the other person gets annoying. Happens all the time which is why so many people split after a few years, even if they stay married a lot of married people stay together because of kids, but not necessarily happy. If you haven't been with a person for more than 7-10 years, it's hard to call yourself in the 10% happily ever after camp.
Pyro Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Lol, why generally speaking of couse? In terms of the happily ever after situation, let me clarify. The vast majority of people can have healthy relationships for a few years, because pair bonding creates the attraction. After the pair bonding hormones wear off it naturally gets boring, the other person gets annoying. Happens all the time which is why so many people split after a few years, even if they stay married a lot of married people stay together because of kids, but not necessarily happy. If you haven't been with a person for more than 7-10 years, it's hard to call yourself in the 10% happily ever after camp. Not all men or women are the same. Its only natural to start being annoyed somewhat of someone after being with them for so long. Newsflash: relationships take work to last. No such thing as a perfect relationship. At least one of the two people will get annoyed or bored at times. That is where communication comes into play. People are just too freaking lazy and/or selfish to try and work on things.
Enchanted Girl Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Not all men or women are the same. Its only natural to start being annoyed somewhat of someone after being with them for so long. Newsflash: relationships take work to last. No such thing as a perfect relationship. At least one of the two people will get annoyed or bored at times. That is where communication comes into play. People are just too freaking lazy and/or selfish to try and work on things. Agreed 100%. I've "only" been with my boyfriend for 5 years and I'm very happy, but by no means has our relationship been easy or whatever. It's taken a lot of work and a lot of tears and sacrifice from both of us to make it that way. It took not being selfish and immature as well. The infatuation or the hormones as you put it, wear off around 6 months into the relationship on average. Mine wore off a long time ago. That's not what's keeping me around.
Author BookerT Posted August 10, 2010 Author Posted August 10, 2010 People are just too freaking lazy and/or selfish to try and work on things. Yeah but that's what I'm getting at. No matter how much we go on about the ideals, the reality is most people are too freaking lazy and selfish. It's easy for a relationship to be good at the beginning when the passion is flowing. Try 15 years later when your partner is no longer physically attractive to you, the sex life is boring because you've done it a couple thousands times. The ideal vs reality is very very different, that's all I'm saying.
Woggle Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Women are pretty much for the most part infatuation junkies. Once the chemicals wear off you might as well be chopped liver to them.
skydiveaddict Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 We can try to fight it, but it'll get the better of many of us sooner or later. At the end of the day only about 10% of people will find their happily ever after. Agree 100% That's why I've given up on women entirely
Pyro Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Yeah but that's what I'm getting at. No matter how much we go on about the ideals, the reality is most people are too freaking lazy and selfish. It's easy for a relationship to be good at the beginning when the passion is flowing. Try 15 years later when your partner is no longer physically attractive to you, the sex life is boring because you've done it a couple thousands times. The ideal vs reality is very very different, that's all I'm saying. well then glad we agree. Women are pretty much for the most part infatuation junkies. Once the chemicals wear off you might as well be chopped liver to them. If you actually placed blame on both genders then you might be taken seriously. Neither gender is innocent.
pandagirl Posted August 10, 2010 Posted August 10, 2010 Idealisitc? Well, if your idea of a relationship is feeling madly in love all the time, never fighting, never being angry or annoyed at your SO and having sex four times a week for the rest of you life... then yeah, you're in for a rude awakening. I've always known I wanted to spend the rest of my life with someone who could be one of my best friends... who I also want to have sex with. Maybe it's my upbringing, but I was always taught marriage was about more about companionship and not the stuff movies are made of.
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