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Men, If You Had No Sex Drive, You Think You Would Still Care As Much About Dating?

jamesum

By jamesum
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jamesum Established Member

jamesum

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Yes, this thread is inspired by a similar thread by Woggle.

 

I personally think that if I had zero sexual pressure, I would probably see women in similar way I see men. And of course I would probably care much less about finding a partner.

 

Based on my experience, I feel heightened romantic feelings when Im horny. But when I dont feel sexual urges, I would rather concentrate on other things in my life.

 

I honestly think that significantly higher libido is a crippling disadvantage for men in life. Because of it, a lot of men are willing to sacrifice many things in exchange for sexual access.

 

Do you guys agree?

Untouchable_Fire Established Member

Untouchable_Fire

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I honestly think that significantly higher libido is a crippling disadvantage for men in life. Because of it, a lot of men are willing to sacrifice many things in exchange for sexual access.

Do you guys agree?

 

I don't really understand what your trying to say. Please provide an example of something you have given up in exchange for sex. Cash doesn't count.

SarahRose Established Member

SarahRose

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There are drugs you can take to lower your libido if it is that much trouble

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jamesum Established Member

jamesum

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Cash doesn't count.

Why not? In my younger naive days I used to work for minimum wage and I spent ALL my money on an ex-girlfriend. How is that not a sacrifice? Its not like I picked my money off trees. I worked night shifts for it. I could have used my money for school instead.

 

There are drugs you can take to lower your libido if it is that much trouble

Actually I have been taking Libidno in the past six months. It is working well although I wished it could be better.

 

I recommend the anaphrodisiac to other men who dont appreciate their libido and wish to lessen it.

sally4sara Established Member

sally4sara

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Why not? In my younger naive days I used to work for minimum wage and I spent ALL my money on an ex-girlfriend. How is that not a sacrifice? Its not like I picked my money off trees. I worked night shifts for it. I could have used my money for school instead.

 

 

Actually I have been taking Libidno in the past six months. It is working well although I wished it could be better.

 

I recommend the anaphrodisiac to other men who dont appreciate their libido and wish to lessen it.

 

Take some personal responsibility jamesum! Unless she was pulling money out of your wallet as you slept - you CHOSE to spend that money on her rather than school.

bayouboi Established Member

bayouboi

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Take some personal responsibility jamesum! Unless she was pulling money out of your wallet as you slept - you CHOSE to spend that money on her rather than school.

 

Um...I think that's kind of the point of his thread. He's questioning whether he would have still spent his resources on the woman if he didn't lust for her.

sally4sara Established Member

sally4sara

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Um...I think that's kind of the point of his thread. He's questioning whether he would have still spent his resources on the woman if he didn't lust for her.

 

It is still relevant. Lots of people deal with lust while still managing their resources. Lamenting after the fact that he could have spent money on something else if not for his lust is NOT TAKING PERSON RESPONSIBILITY.

 

Maybe if he was better at taking personal responsibility, he's come up with some other means of dealing with his lust rather than throwing money at it.

MrNate Established Member

MrNate

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I dunno. If this happened there would be a lot more sexually frustrated women out there, and would probably careless if our libido disappeared.

 

I don't think it would stop them from getting theirs lol. Women who are not really known in society for being aggressors would become the aggressors real quick.

espec10001 Established Member

espec10001

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Everyone is going to turn gay and lesbian that's my prediction for America at least haha

Feelin Frisky Established Member

Feelin Frisky

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...I honestly think that significantly higher libido is a crippling disadvantage for men in life. Because of it, a lot of men are willing to sacrifice many things in exchange for sexual access.

 

Do you guys agree?

 

I wouldn't go that far. Crippling disadvantage? Nay I say unto thee. It's part of the differences that make us all unique. Some with such libido's do manage to be consumed somehow by them. But others are lucky in love and live their desires fulfilled. If that keeps them occupied, that's more opportunity for me to succeed while they're off knocking boots. :D

Engadget Established Member

Engadget

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I would still look for that connection and emotional bond, so yes.

OceanTropic Established Member

OceanTropic

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Well i'm not a guy so I can't really tell you personally but... really??

 

I had NO idea... seriously. But even if a man is sexually satisfied, doesn't he still crave a feminine touch in his life? A softer, mother-nature like person to walk next to him?

 

I think even if your sex drive was much lower, you would still crave that company....wouldn't you? I would hate to think if my boyfriend/husband would one day somehow have a freak accident and lose his libido that he wouldn't love me anymore lol

jakinbandw Member

jakinbandw

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I would. Sex is only a small part of a relationship. It is a wonderful thing to have someone that you care about and cares about you. Working together and enjoying eachothers presence. And while you could get the same thing from a ss relationship, you wouldn't be able to raise a child later on. Being able to raise a child to continue after you are gone is (from what I hear) a wonderful thing.

 

Also Boone is perfect and we all have weak points. Having someone who loves you and will cover you on those points is I believe necessary. You are more likely to find that alternate pov in the opposite sex, though that is not universally true.

 

Just my two cents

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jamesum Established Member

jamesum

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It is still relevant. Lots of people deal with lust while still managing their resources. Lamenting after the fact that he could have spent money on something else if not for his lust is NOT TAKING PERSON RESPONSIBILITY.

 

Maybe if he was better at taking personal responsibility, he's come up with some other means of dealing with his lust rather than throwing money at it.

I was 19 at that time. I didnt know better. Also my whole point is that libido clouds your judgment and it is a scientific fact. I dont know if its correlated but now Im in my twenties and no longer a 'horny teenage boy' and have more experience, I have improved judgment.

 

I would still look for that connection and emotional bond, so yes.

Of course, humans are social creatures. But the question is 'would you still care as much'?

 

Well i'm not a guy so I can't really tell you personally but... really??

 

I had NO idea... seriously. But even if a man is sexually satisfied, doesn't he still crave a feminine touch in his life? A softer, mother-nature like person to walk next to him?

 

I think even if your sex drive was much lower, you would still crave that company....wouldn't you? I would hate to think if my boyfriend/husband would one day somehow have a freak accident and lose his libido that he wouldn't love me anymore lol

Without libido, you wont have passionate urges.

 

There is a difference between needing friends and needing intimate partners.

 

If I had lost all my sex drive, I would still look for companions. But I won't be as desperate to get them or to keep them.

Maggotface Established Member

Maggotface

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A lot of girls, my self included, just get along better with males so i still think there would be a companionship between women and men. Possibly even better friendships because sex often ruins everything between friends.

carhill Established Member

carhill

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Do you guys agree?

 

Before reading the rest of the thread, I'll bet most men would agree.

 

Having been socialized differently and perhaps even having a bit different brain chemistry than the norm, I find my sexual appetite ebbs and flows with the intimacy levels I achieve with the various ladies in my life. I have yet to find any significant correlation with 'normal' sexual cycles. This is likely how I can be around women for years and, with a change in circumstances, where more intimacy results, I suddenly begin to get these feelings of attraction. The woman is still the same, physically, and often, due to the passing of years, has objectively become 'less' attractive, but, whoa, that intimacy flips a switch in my brain which is hard to ignore. It was the same in my marriage. Intimacy and connection were a big turn-on, and, the reverse, in the desert of indifference, I chose to get my intimacy elsewhere, an unhealthy choice.

 

When it (intimacy) disappears, or she disappears, or, like now, getting a divorce, my libido is back at idle. Maybe that's a blessing. Sure is a lot which can get done without horndog on the brain ;)

 

When Stbx commented in MC about wishing I was a 'normal' guy, meaning one who would just desire her sexually without all that complicated emotional and intimacy stuff, this is what she was talking about.

 

One datapoint :)

Green Established Member

Green

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There are a lot of things I enjoy about having a gf that has nothing to do with sex. I enjoy her touch on a comfort level. I enjoy knowing some one very well and having some one know me and my secrets. I like the idea that I could one day make a family of my own.

 

Sex drive was esential in given me a drive and confidence to find a gf. It was testosterone and horyness that gave me the confidence to go out there and get a gf. Yes I really enjoy sex, and wow it is a lot of fun. but seriously if that was all I cared about I would just go around having sex with lots of different women and not really waste any ones time by being in a relatonship with them. The FACT is sex is only one reason that I date my gf but it is an important part.

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jamesum Established Member

jamesum

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There are a lot of things I enjoy about having a gf that has nothing to do with sex. I enjoy her touch on a comfort level. I enjoy knowing some one very well and having some one know me and my secrets. I like the idea that I could one day make a family of my own.

 

Sex drive was esential in given me a drive and confidence to find a gf. It was testosterone and horyness that gave me the confidence to go out there and get a gf. Yes I really enjoy sex, and wow it is a lot of fun. but seriously if that was all I cared about I would just go around having sex with lots of different women and not really waste any ones time by being in a relatonship with them. The FACT is sex is only one reason that I date my gf but it is an important part.

Basically you agree with me then. :rolleyes:

elaina Established Member

elaina

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Posted (edited)
Yes, this thread is inspired by a similar thread by Woggle.

 

I personally think that if I had zero sexual pressure, I would probably see women in similar way I see men. And of course I would probably care much less about finding a partner.

 

Based on my experience, I feel heightened romantic feelings when Im horny. But when I dont feel sexual urges, I would rather concentrate on other things in my life.

 

I honestly think that significantly higher libido is a crippling disadvantage for men in life. Because of it, a lot of men are willing to sacrifice many things in exchange for sexual access.

 

Do you guys agree?

 

Hello Jamesum,

 

I disagree, because if for example, all men suddenly lost their sex drive lol, the human species would be in trouble! Men who are smart would suddenly realize, hey! If I care about the human race continuing, I'm going to have to mate with a woman, even though I don't want to, and do my best to help her take care of our child.

 

That's what marriage is for. :)

 

Men seem to forget that sometimes. Why, I don't know. :p

 

Dating is a way to meet the human desire to find the right mate. Marriage is a way to meet the needs humans have in order to reproduce. Most (not all) but most women feel they need a commitment from the man for the following:

 

1. love (including sex.)

2. respect

3. provisions in some way (financial, emotional, spiritual,...) for her and for the offspring they bring into the world.

 

Most people who date just for sex and not for offspring are not thinking of the above, I don't think.

 

For a long time, dating was to find the right person to marry, and marriage was not just about sex. It was (and to some people still is) a commitment and a partnership. Long time ago, men worked outside the home, and women worked inside the home (cooking, cleaning, sewing...) Now, both men and women work outside the home and can work inside the home, although more women carry the brunt of the inside work (cooking, cleaning) too.

 

Also, people used to marry to connect families and for stronger family (or country) ties. So, I don't think men would stop dating if they had no sex drive. The opposite gender is not just for sex. Both genders need each other. It's a part of how our species works. :)

Edited by elaina
You'reasian Established Member

You'reasian

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Yes, this thread is inspired by a similar thread by Woggle.

 

I honestly think that significantly higher libido is a crippling disadvantage for men in life. Because of it, a lot of men are willing to sacrifice many things in exchange for sexual access.

 

Do you guys agree?

 

Define sexual access.

 

In some places a man can find a woman, have a quick go with her and then leave.

 

When a man has to spend a significant amount of time with a woman, he may develop emotions and then make sacrifices based on those emotions.

 

Depends on the kind of relationship.

 

In history, there are famous men who had high libidos; for some it was a problem, for others not at all.

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jamesum Established Member

jamesum

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I honestly could care less about the continuity of the human race.

 

And once again I never said that men would stop dating if we had no libido. I only said that we would not care as much.

You Go Girl Established Member

You Go Girl

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And women? Do you not think they are sexually driven to find a partner? Think again if so!

One thing is for sure, the world would become a disaster. Committment, the family unit, devotion, all these things would go down the toilet.

Women would care less too without sexual drive. Why wash a man's underwear except for trade, say, he brings me a good chunk of meat.

Barbaric, no?

 

This thread reminds me of two things, the first being stay away from men whose motivations boil down to sex EVERYTIME, and rarely intimacy and friendship. Secondly it reminds me to take good care sexually of a man when I have a good one.

somedude81 Established Member

somedude81

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If I had zero sex drive, I'd probably have a ton of female friends. Dating would be irrelevant. Heh, my life would be pretty different if I stopped trying to screw every girl I knew.

meerkat stew Established Member

meerkat stew

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It's a chicken and egg thing. Personally, I don't find many women very interesting companions other than the sexual aspect, they seem totally self-absorbed, vain, lack wit, poor taste in general. But then again, I don't find many men very interesting companions for the same exact reasons :laugh:

 

Back to the chicken and egg, if you were conditioned and reinforced throughout your life that a vast majority of people you come in contact with would evaluate you as a person strictly on your appearance, and efforts to be different would be met with indifference or even scorn, wouldn't you be more likely to be shallow? Would that be your fault, or the fault of people who reinforced those cultural expectations?

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