jw90063 Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 I want other people's opinions on this matter. Personally, I feel you can tell a lot by just hearing someone's voice, but recently I have a situation that's really bugging me. I started talking to his guy just online and things went great. When he finally calls, I can almost sense that he might actually be pretty cocky or even a jerk. He even admitted he can be a little cocky. Uh, this is really bugging me. I don't know if I want to go to the trouble of meeting in person, if my instincts are telling me this. It sucks because I really was enjoying conversing with him, and we seem to have a lot in common. It was really fun chatting with him. I even liked talking on phone, but in the back of my mind at times, I got this vibe from him that almost made me nauseated-I know that sounds bad. I don't think I ever completely relaxed talking to him either. I'm trying to think positively, like ok maybe I'm just reading him differently on phone, and would be much better in person. I just don't know. I've talked to guys before, and you can really sense something in the voice as to whether they are really down to earth, laid back, genuinely nice etc. I also know there have been times I think a guy sounds really nice, then he's not so nice after all. Is this really my gut telling me something is wrong here or what? I'm afraid if I don't meet this guy, then I'll always wonder what if things were much better in person. It just scares me that he is someone I wouldn't be comfortable with(even a first date scares me).What do you think about reading someone from their voice? Do you think hearing someone's voice alone is a good indicator of what type of person they are?
2sure Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 He may be nervous. If he is, his tone will be affected. Also, it is not uncommon for a man to use "cocky" as a cover for nerves. But sure, you can tell some things from a persons voice, demeanor, and speech pattern on the phone. Inflection, vocabulary, humor, etc. All important. I would say if you arent feeling it in your gut...dont bother.
Rifareal Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 Voice isn't a good way to determine his personality. Meeting him and having some time is way better.
espec10001 Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 YES. If a woman has a scratchy voice it means she either smokes a lot or YELLS a lot. Scares me away good!
Author jw90063 Posted August 3, 2010 Author Posted August 3, 2010 I'm not talking about if someone's voice is "scratchy" or whatever. I guess it's hard to explain. Its the tone they use, the way they say things, respond to what you have to say etc. But yeah, I guess I should maybe go on my instinct with this one. I could meet him, and was considering this coming weekend, but I am not getting a good feeling about it.
2sure Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 Tone and inflection, a person's speaking voice...are part of who they are, how they communicate, how they present themselves. To me, thats important.
Feelin Frisky Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 Agree with 2sure. Consider too that communicating on-line is not the same as getting to know someone IRL. On-line is just chosen words placed on a screen. Talking over the phone is truly spontaneous where someone doesn't get to "craft" their apparent personality. If you went so far as to feel nauseated by this dude's manner of speech and you are the type that is not looking for Johnny Dangerous but instead someone trustworthy and even-tempered, your instincts have told you what you need to know.
Author jw90063 Posted August 3, 2010 Author Posted August 3, 2010 Ok thanks for the replies. I do wonder what 2sure said about being nervous. That did cross my mind as well. He just seems pretty confident, so I don't know. I know after talking to him a while one night, things seemed a bit better, like perhaps he was feeling less nervous, and therefore I didn't get that bad vibe as much. So its a possibility nervousness is a factor. Well, that's what sucks about going from chatting online to phone. Sometimes its the same or better and sometimes it doesn't seem the same at all.
Serenitynow Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 Well, that's what sucks about going from chatting online to phone. Sometimes its the same or better and sometimes it doesn't seem the same at all. That's because chatting online, you're brain fabricates how you view the person to be. You don't have enough stimulus (tone, body language, mannerisms, etc) to go on. It's very easy for people to assume they like someone online, but when you meet in person, you realize they are a total 180 from what you expected I do believe a lot can be determined from just over the phone, if one pays attention. .
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