Dblock10 Posted August 2, 2010 Posted August 2, 2010 Please give me them. A list if you will. after a date do you wait a day to txt them? or call even? How do you know if they are interested, do actions speak louder than words? do you go with your "gut" feeling on things. How do you initiate the second date and when do you do this?
Raderick Posted August 2, 2010 Posted August 2, 2010 I hate dating rules. Go on feel, not on a set of so-called "guidelines".
Author Dblock10 Posted August 2, 2010 Author Posted August 2, 2010 good cause it seems like many people follow set rules, and i think its childish
alphamale Posted August 2, 2010 Posted August 2, 2010 rule #1 is to relax and just go with the flow. if you observe the chick she will tell you what to do rule #2 is to get the chick liquored up
AverageJoe Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 #3 If a woman thinks your a jerk, you are doing something right. #4 Always use birth control, regardless of what a woman tells you.
bobdole Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 #4 Always use birth control, regardless of what a woman tells you. Ding F'ing Ding! Definitely some crazies out there. Ran into one a few years ago who eventually told about 6 months later me she was actually not on any birth control the first couple of weeks we had sex when she had told me she was. I got lucky...
bac Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 (edited) You can change rules depending on your situation. In general, you contact a girl by text, or email, or phone during 24 hrs after the first date to let her know that you had a great time and that you want to see her again some day. You can do the first kiss on 1-3 day depending on her preferences. Go with your gut to figure out on which day she is ready for the first kiss. Some girls are not ready for a kiss on the first/second day even they like a man. She should reply you that she enjoyed the meeting and wants to meet you again. Then you might want to ask her if she wants to go out with you on some day during next week or something. Let her choose dates if she wants. It is good to meet each other at least about 1 (2) time per week for dating. But, it depends on your time and situation. You may start making out on about 3 date. You may have sex on about 5-6 date. But, the numbers are for average mature adults, so if you are a very young person you should see what is the situation. Anyway, girls are different and they have different rules of dating. So, you might want to try to get some idea about your girl rules. Perhaps, she wants to hold sex untill marriage. But, some other girls would have no problems to have sex on 1-2 dates. Edited August 3, 2010 by bac
Author Dblock10 Posted August 3, 2010 Author Posted August 3, 2010 great replies! yes that sounds feasible, for what ever reason girls that you treat like an ass like you more.. or is this a myth? or is this true only with certain types of girls? I spoke to her last night and she wants to meet again, so will see when she is ready. I wont do any chasing because it puts them off. Im going to carry on with my life and go out and still have fun.
SassyKitten Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 Rules are made to be broken!! That said, having sex without a condom and birth control before establishing exclusivity is just plain stupid.
Author Dblock10 Posted August 3, 2010 Author Posted August 3, 2010 Rules are made to be broken!! That said, having sex without a condom and birth control before establishing exclusivity is just plain stupid. yeah i'm not worried about that stage just yet, how and when do you establish exclusivity? Example convo?
jasmorgan Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 I think that's great advice. I have a question though that I hope you can answer Wildcat...what if some guy did all that stuff you mentioned that a guy should not do, and he loses the girl.
zengirl Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 I guess my only real dating rules are: *that there must be commitment (emotional investment, not just sexual exclusivity) before sex. And that's not a dating rule, so much as a personal "rule" that works for me, based on my experiences. *not to do anything that makes me feel unhappy or bad about myself. If I feel myself "chasing" or "compromising" something early on and it is making me feel cognitive dissonance, I exit the situation if I cannot easily amend the feeling. *to try to communicate honestly at each stage, within reason (i.e. not spilling my whole personal private self immediately, like soul-vomit or something, but always being emotionally honest and generally so). *call people back within 48 hours. But that's a communication rule I give myself for everyone who calls/texts me in general. *do what I say I'll do. I guess this goes with communicating honestly, but I think it deserves its own. Everything else is flexible.
zengirl Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 great replies! yes that sounds feasible, for what ever reason girls that you treat like an ass like you more.. or is this a myth? or is this true only with certain types of girls? I spoke to her last night and she wants to meet again, so will see when she is ready. I wont do any chasing because it puts them off. Im going to carry on with my life and go out and still have fun. a) That only works with unhealthy girls, just as the "Treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen" method only works with unhealthy men. b) People use the word "chasing" oddly sometimes. I think if you want to date someone, and they're reciprocating your signals, going after them so to speak (asserting what you want in a healthy manner) is unlikely to put anybody off that actually would be compatible and someone good for you to date. Then again, clingy, needy, chasing behavior can be a turnoff. . . but it's better to fix what makes anyone initiate that behavior than just the behavior itself. c) Yes, your life should always be fun!
bac Posted August 3, 2010 Posted August 3, 2010 yeah i'm not worried about that stage just yet, how and when do you establish exclusivity? Example convo? You establish exclusivity whenever you have a need for that. If any of you have emotional need to talk about the stuff, you deal with that. For example, if your girl is pretty young she might really need that you say that you agree to be exclusive before you have sex. Otherwise, you might start talking about it in a few months when you have rapport and you are sure that you really want to be exclusive. I would not advice to be jerk because from what I know it creates instant rejection if a girl has at least some minimal level of maturity and common sense. As for talking about exclusivity too early, when a male starts talking about it, it creates in girl's brain instant illusion of emotional connection and gives her unrealistic expectations of a serious relationship with the guy. On the other hand, if a girl does not want a serious relationship with the guy or experienced enough to figure out that it done too early, talking about issure will just confuse or annoy her.
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