yellowjack Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Up until a few days ago, I'd been dating a new wonderful guy for a couple of months. We have a lot of things in common, have great conversations and great chemistry. We were seeing each other regularly and keeping in touch through text, e-mails and phone calls frequently. Everything was going great until last week when he went MIA for several days. We didn't necessarily talk daily, but it was odd because we had plans and he ditched on the plans, I never heard back from him. When he finally called, he told me that his recent ex (they broke up 6 mos. ago) wanted to get back with him. This threw him into confusion and now he's taking a break from dating to sort things out. I think this is good, but it's hard for me to take at the same time. I can't predict the outcome, but I need to find ways to get my mind off this. I've been watching alot of TV which only makes it worse. I met with some of the girls from my knitting group last night but couldn't have fun because this is painful. I know I shouldn't wait for him, but I can't stop thinking about having him back.
SassyKitten Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 That sounds exactly like my last breakup, he went missing for a few days and then called to say he got back together with his ex. This hurt excruciatingly as I had never felt a connection in my life before like I felt with him, and it felt like a huge part of me was being ripped off and it still stings. My advice would be to do something you probably wouldn't have gotten to do if you were still with him. This is one reason I'm flying to Montreal next week, I need a vacation and travelling is the best medicine for so many things in my book. I hope if he Googles my name he'll find my photos from Montreal, see me having a good time, and realize what he missed out on. I still don't want him back though, I really can't deal with a man who doesn't view me as important enough to talk with regularly!
JadedHeart Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 You need to tell him, you can take all the time in the world to think. Then leave this crap.
SassyKitten Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 You need to tell him, you can take all the time in the world to think. Then leave this crap. Sending a very long email detailing how much he hurt, betrayed, and disappointed me helped me as well. I made it detailed, spared no blows, and let it go.
zengirl Posted July 30, 2010 Posted July 30, 2010 Up until a few days ago, I'd been dating a new wonderful guy for a couple of months. We have a lot of things in common, have great conversations and great chemistry. We were seeing each other regularly and keeping in touch through text, e-mails and phone calls frequently. Everything was going great until last week when he went MIA for several days. We didn't necessarily talk daily, but it was odd because we had plans and he ditched on the plans, I never heard back from him. When he finally called, he told me that his recent ex (they broke up 6 mos. ago) wanted to get back with him. This threw him into confusion and now he's taking a break from dating to sort things out. I think this is good, but it's hard for me to take at the same time. I can't predict the outcome, but I need to find ways to get my mind off this. I've been watching alot of TV which only makes it worse. I met with some of the girls from my knitting group last night but couldn't have fun because this is painful. I know I shouldn't wait for him, but I can't stop thinking about having him back. That sucks. I've been there (well, not quote there. . . I was dating a guy I really liked for 3 weeks before that happened; he decided to get back together with his ex; they broke up again 2 weeks later (his choice, supposedly, this time); he started trying to date me again, but it never really worked because the trust was lost; we're still friends). Anyway, it's no fun. Don't wait. I'd also say: Don't write him terrible emails or attack him. He did do wrong by dropping off the planet, but then at least he 'fessed up. It's an understandable thing that happens. People's emotions go haywire.
Author yellowjack Posted July 30, 2010 Author Posted July 30, 2010 Sending an email might be a good idea. My original thought was to not contact him at all about this, but now I'm thinking otherwise. I am not going to attack him, but I will let him know that what he did was hurtful and why. I like the vacation idea! Hope your trip to Montreal is fun and cathartic SassyKitten.
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