Lishy Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 How do/did you know you have met a keeper? How do you know if they view you in the same light? What does love look like???????? How did you know the person you met was the one worth treating well and when did you realise that you had met your lobster?? So many flakey guys/girls and they all seem so keen to start with! Helppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 How do/did you know you have met a keeper? How do you know if they view you in the same light? What does love look like???????? How did you know the person you met was the one worth treating well and when did you realise that you had met your lobster?? So many flakey guys/girls and they all seem so keen to start with! Helppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Love looks like Commitment, Understanding, Unselfishness.
xpaperxcutx Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Love is a heartattack waiting to happen. I don't know, the more I date, the more I just want to be alone. It's frustration and annoyance rolled into one.
CLC2008 Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 I subscribe it to be a vision that is tailored to each of us, in our own way. http://www.relationshipweb.com/archives/1996/contents/0067.htm See.
Author Lishy Posted July 16, 2010 Author Posted July 16, 2010 But how would you know if you have met a guy worth it? They all seem so keen and nice and then POOF!
Star Gazer Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Eff if I know, Lishy! I thought I had it! The moment I realized I didn't, was actually the night before we broke up. His brother had just got home from his honeymoon, and we were at his house catching up, hearing about the trip, etc. Skiman said to brother: "Man, I bet it sucks to leave such an awesome vacation and come home, eh?" Brother: "Nah, actually, when you have an awesome house, and yard, and dog, and an even more awesome wife to come home to, you don't really get excited about being away from home anymore." In that moment, I knew... Skiman didn't feel the same way. I saw what love looked like in that conversation, but it wasn't for me.
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 But how would you know if you have met a guy worth it? They all seem so keen and nice and then POOF! Hey... WTF is this RIP Lyssa thing? Is that true?
Author Lishy Posted July 16, 2010 Author Posted July 16, 2010 Hey... WTF is this RIP Lyssa thing? Is that true? Yes I am afraid so Fire
Author Lishy Posted July 16, 2010 Author Posted July 16, 2010 Star, that really upsets me to think you can be with a guy and think it is all ok and then POOF, it is gone! I see it happen all the time and it scares me
Untouchable_Fire Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Yes I am afraid so Fire :lmao::lmao::lmao:.... not fair
threebyfate Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Even when hormones are going nuts while you're in the infatuation stage, if respect isn't there, you've got a problem Houston!
skydiveaddict Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Star, that really upsets me to think you can be with a guy and think it is all ok and then POOF, it is gone! I see it happen all the time and it scares me that's what happened to me. one day we're in love the next day poof! I never heard from her again
CLC2008 Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 But how would you know if you have met a guy worth it? They all seem so keen and nice and then POOF! Well one example, is if you bring up the "relationship" discussion, and he bolts and you never hear from him again. That means he's a poofer. I've been poofed on .
You'reasian Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 (edited) But how would you know if you have met a guy worth it? They all seem so keen and nice and then POOF! The first step is to get to know a guy. You must communicate with him. He must communicate with you. You should converse with him regularly over a period of time to see what he's thinking and tell him what you are thinking. Even better? Spend time with him doing things - even things like chores just to get a feel for him. The more time you spend being together, the better because you will get to know him and be able to judge for yourself if he is worth it. Shallow/quick dating ideologies do not work for forming long term relationships. This goes against all the conventional dating rules, but if you want someone to stick around for awhile, this will help you know if you've met a guy whose worth it. If you're the kind of woman that doesn't like to talk and is not very active with him, this is going to be a set back. Edited July 16, 2010 by You'reasian
You'reasian Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 How do/did you know you have met a keeper? How do you know if they view you in the same light? What does love look like???????? How did you know the person you met was the one worth treating well and when did you realise that you had met your lobster?? So many flakey guys/girls and they all seem so keen to start with! Helppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What does love look like? You won't see too much of it in clubs, nor bars. Its personified as a comfortable, warm smile shared with a couple when they find the few moments of free time in the day to appreciate one another. If you want to meet someone whose not flaky, the first step is to not be flaky. Define what you believe to be flaky, look within to see if you need to remove anything and then decide that its a behavior that you will not put up with others. Lastly, go to places where you believe you will find reliable, great people and get to know them.
Cobra_X Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 If you're the kind of woman that doesn't like to talk and is not very active with him, this is going to be a set back. Somehow I don't see this as an obstacle for Lishy.
You'reasian Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 Somehow I don't see this as an obstacle for Lishy. I don't either, but I put it out there for anyone...
nlw82 Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 But how would you know if you have met a guy worth it? They all seem so keen and nice and then POOF! In my experience most people, especially women, miss what's right in front of them. Most people have this ideal picture of what they want. Once they think they find it, it simply disappears because it turns out in the end that that guy/girl was shallow, conceited, or simply a poor human specimen.
You'reasian Posted July 16, 2010 Posted July 16, 2010 In my experience most people, especially women, miss what's right in front of them. Most people have this ideal picture of what they want. Once they think they find it, it simply disappears because it turns out in the end that that guy/girl was shallow, conceited, or simply a poor human specimen. Women are quick to judge, especially quirks and then bail. So many date stories on here of women lambasting men from their dates.
alphamale Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 What does love look like???????? it looks like a dewey meadow with a taco bell on the other side
sunshinegirl Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 How do/did you know you have met a keeper? I first knew he was a keeper when he exhibited, consistently over time, genuine interest in me, my thoughts, my day, my family, my friends. He paid attention to details; remembered things I'd said; listened well; went the extra mile to be attentive in truly caring ways. And made me laugh like no one else. How do you know if they view you in the same light? This sounds, I don't know, trite or something, but I could see it in his eyes and in his smile. He was also very clear and up-front about his interest in me. I never wondered - never once - about how he felt about me. But yeah, actually, I really knew it was real because of how he looked at me. What does love look like???????? For us, it is intimacy, baring ourselves to each other and accepting who the other person is. I had never dated someone who was so willing to be vulnerable and let me know the real him, warts and all. He loves his sports teams, and he can also talk about his feelings. Love also looks like: our inside jokes; our looking out for each other; our shared hopes and dreams; our hand-holding. How did you know the person you met was the one worth treating well and when did you realise that you had met your lobster?? Our one-on-one interactions were always so good, but beyond that as I got to know his family and friends, all of whom adore him and to whom he's really connected, I knew I had the real deal. No doubt I got a bit lucky in finding my fiance, but I also did a lot of work on myself, and kissed my share of frogs, and had my share of heartache & mistakes, before meeting him. So keep the faith - every flaky person you go out with is one person closer to the one you are meant to find.
zengirl Posted July 17, 2010 Posted July 17, 2010 I'm not currently in love and haven't met my 'lobster' yet, though I've been in some good relationships (and one bad one a long time ago). I mainly look to my mother and step-father to define love for me. I want what they have. They both had crap first marriages. They seem an awkward fit at first, with a lot of obstacles, but they are perfect and have been together for 16 years. They both said they realized it was a good relationship because it had everything their bad marriages didn't---great conversations, trust, a mutual background, and genuine natural love for the person. Not scary butterfly love that turns into resentment, fear, resistance, and bitterness, but genuine affection. I think that kind of love is: Being happy with the person. Wanting the person to be happy. Knowing that person always has your back. Living with (or knowing you could someday live with) the person every day and still finding them interesting. The best relationships I've in have been kind of like this -- not ultimately, of course, as some things just go wrong -- and they've been easy. Of course, it still takes work and all that, but it's a fun sort of difficulty.
flying Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 it looks like a dewey meadow with a taco bell on the other side I'm feeling a little down-with-love at the moment.
bayouboi Posted July 19, 2010 Posted July 19, 2010 I want to know what love is. I want you to show me.
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