dating problems

[meghan]

Hi everyone,

 

My name is Meg and I'm a single mother (I have a beautiful 18 month old girl). Her father left before she was born and is completely out of the picture, and I have recently started dating again. However all of the guys I am meeting seem to have a real problem with the fact that I have a child & lose interest as soon as I tell them. What am I doing wrong? Is it always best to be upfront, or should I wait until I know them a bit better before saying anything?

 

 

PS - I know this doesnt really have anything to do with my dating issue but......I have just entered a competition to win a kitchen makeover for my horrible old 1960's powder blue number thats literally falling apart!!!! I'm currently in 4th place, so if you have a spare moment please check out my pics/entry & if you agree that its pretty yucky then I'd really appreciate your support by voting for it.

 

http://www.mykitchensucks.com.au/link/1933/80/Meghan's+Kitchen+sucks

 

Cheers,

 

Meg xx

[Kang]

First of all how old are you?

 

If you're 18/19/20/21/ and are looking to date in that age range.. not many guys like baggage, and I personally would not want to go out with a single mom (18 here)

 

I don't really know why, its just like theres an alarm going off in my head to run.

[Lakeside_runner]

I think it's best to be honest upfront. Let them even know before you go out on a date. This way you'll avoid a lot of disappointment and when you go out on a date it'll be with someone who's OK with the fact that you're a single mom.

 

P.S. Sorry to say that... but your kitchen really sucks. I know the importance of having a nice kitchen

[Morals]

The younger you are, and the younger your kid is, the less likely younger men will be interested. Unfortunately that's just the way of it.

 

I feel for you, but I fall into the same category. I don't date anyone with kids at the moment, because I know that I'm not ready to be a father at this time in my life. I'm almost 27, and while some people are fathers at this age, I'm not ready for it.

 

I've never really been truly in love, and I want to experience that at least first before putting a kid into the equation. I'm sure you will find someone who wants to be with you and your wonderful 18 month old.

[Eeyore79]

You aren't doing anything wrong, it's just that some guys don't want to date a woman with a child. There are plenty of guys who will be fine with it though, you just have to keep looking. I think it's best to be up-front about things so you don't waste your time on guys who ultimately don't want to be involved with a single mother.

[lucy9216]

Unfortunately yes dating is more difficult when they are kids involved! I have two kids that are 4 and 9 both from different fathers so this is my 2nd time around at being a single mom. Yes guys will see you as baggage and it is frustrating at times! I had one guy after buying me a beer and I mentioned my kids he literally ran off and left his beer!! haha! it is funny to laugh at now but honestly the right one will not mind! I have found a few that don't mind but I have made a decision to stay single till they are older, its tough! but takes away from heartache and disapointment! you should try meetup.com they have single parent meet ups and maybe you can find someone that has a kid too! that could work out well!

[Sivok]

Be upfront about it. A guy knows that a single mom's time is going to be competed for by her kids, and if things get serious, he may be seeing himself in a step dad role one day. It's the guy's right to choose whether that's a factor or not; waiting for him to develop feelings for you before dropping that on him is very unfair.

[SierraRose]

Once you become a mother, you and your child are a package deal. Men will come and go, but your child is yours forever.