Author sinny Posted January 29, 2004 Author Share Posted January 29, 2004 [ Dont gender bash, cause it works the other way too Hey, I said SOMETIMES Link to post Share on other sites
Darkangelism Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 Originally posted by sinny [ Dont gender bash, cause it works the other way too Hey, I said SOMETIMES I know what you said, but whatever its a minor point, no point in arguing Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 I think there are a number of reasons for this. Whether it's innate or conditioned (I think both), men rely upon physical attraction more than women do. You see this even at early ages when women are talking about how confident her boyfriend is while the guy is raving to his buddies about what a wonderful ass and rack she's got. Doesn't mean women don't like sex or that men don't appreciate brains, but I think the two genders gravitate toward each component respectively. Unfortunately, as we mature, younger women keep bringing the sexual heat that men want whereas the older women make better, more stable companions. Would you believe I'm 29 and dating a woman who's 41? It happens. I think she's physically and psychologically attractive to me, and she's just a wonderful person through and through. I'd be lying, though, if I told you that I don't worry about the future. I know that sounds shallow, but I guess I'm just your average shallow guy when it comes to that stuff. I kinda doubt we'll ever get married for the simple reason being I don't want to wake up one morning and not find myself stimulated by her, forcing me to think about looking outside the marriage for sex. Younger women are both a man's ideal and a pain in the ass. They tend to be more selfish and demanding than older women. I think the key is to find someone whose mental maturity is balanced properly with their physical attractiveness, and for that comes at different ages for different women. Link to post Share on other sites
InmannRoshi Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 Its funny because I'm actually reading a book about our genetic markers and research done in the area, and there is a big long section on the topic of beauty and attraction that I read last night. Researchers cover the entire globe and reach far away tribes and have found that there is a basic universal formula for beauty. People who lived in Manhattan or a hut out in the Amazon with no exposure to mass media and pop culture all picked the same people that they thought to be attractive out of a group of photos. Men from all over the world prefer youth, which signifies that its probably an inherent biological marker to the species. Women's reproductive abilities decrease as they age, so it makes sense. There's another study where researchers took photos of people and over-exaggerated certain facial features, and asked men to pick the most attractive. Almost unanimously, men chose markers that signify youth ... small jawline, full pouty lips, big round eyes, thick luxorious hair. Other cultural markers follow this trend (think of Barbie's big doe eyes and full head of hair). Supermodels generally all have over-exaggerated examples of these features. And men's preference for youth and beauty is not just refined to women. A study of homosexual men personal ads found that they were almost 10 times as likely to mention age and attractiveness in what they were seeking and advertising their own. On contrast, lesbian women were most likely to list money and friendship and desired qualities. And yes, on the flipside, its been found that there is an attraction to older men that is almost universal through all cultures, both past and present. The average huband in the 20th Century United States is 3 years older than his wife. That's the same exact figure as 9th Century Holland. In fact, it seems to be a common average around the world. Status and the accrual of resources seem to be a common desirable trait in males throughout the animal kingdom, and humans are no different. It makes sense for reproduction and the chances of your young surviving. It takes time to build status and aquire resources, so it shouldn't be surprising many women find older men sexy. A man in his 40's, on average, makes about $20,000 more than his 20 year old counterpart. Anyway, I ranted ... I could go on about how research has found that women are more likely to reach orgasm symmetrical males, but I digress. And, yes, I'm a huge dork. Link to post Share on other sites
Darkangelism Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 Wow that is really interesting. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 When I was younger....I was drawn to older guys. Now that I'm older.....I like them younger. Maybe I OUTGREW my 'Daddy Issue'........HAHA! Link to post Share on other sites
cdn Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 And, yes, I'm a huge dork. Actually, this is quite appealing. It's the fact that you wear socks in bed that is off-putting! Link to post Share on other sites
Benedict Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 As far as men being in a sexual relationship with youger women, it is purely a matter of young, firm and perky, as has been mentioned here. I agree that guys - in general - are more visual, and a little less in tune with the emotional aspects of sex. In a relationship-relationship, though, there are (obviously) different factors that come into play. My observations over the years lead me to believe that women who have experience in the world - your 33-55 age group, to provide a rough reference point - have a lot of confidence. They know what they want, and are more vocal about getting it. I think that society (wrongly) qualifies this as a male trait. I also think, again based on my observations, that most men do not like this at all. Most seem to like slightly more pliable women. I will now duck the thrown stones... Oh, and by the way, I notice that the "prettiest" women of that "older" group have this focused, determined, know-what-they-want trait in spades - which I find wildly attractive... Link to post Share on other sites
InmannRoshi Posted January 29, 2004 Share Posted January 29, 2004 Well, its a good thing that I omitted my post-coittal routine of debillitating guilt, uncontrollable crying, sucking on my thumb in the fetal position, and scrubbing my genitals raw with hot, soappy water. Link to post Share on other sites
stranger passing by Posted October 22, 2005 Share Posted October 22, 2005 I am a 21 year old woman who fell in love with a 51 year old man. I really can't explain how it happened because I am not the type of person who is typically attracted to men of that age. We were friends first and things just progressed. Part of it is the maturity level. I have always been extremely mature for my age and I have felt more comfortable in peer groups that are older than myself. A wise friend of mine once said, "you can't choose who you love." I agree whole heartedly. I would never have chosen to fall in love with a 51 year old, but I did. He is everything I have ever wanted in a man except for his age. I completely love him with all of my heart, but the age difference definitely creates problems. Beyond social problems, there is the problem of children. This is one of the main reasons I don't think this relationship won't work no matter how much we both want it to. I want kids, but I want my kids to have a father well into their life. An age difference like this creates struggles, none of them having to do with love. As much as iI have found love in am older man, I wouldn't reccomend that people go out seeking these relationships. If it happens it happens, and the couple will have to deal with the struggles that come with the territory. But it is not worth the struggles and heartache if you are just looking for an experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts