Would you still do it for the experiences?

[blinded]

I wouldn't because in the back of my mind I will always be worried about the end.

 

One or both partners end up holding back a bit in hopes that things wouldn't hurt as much when it was time to end. Only to realize that you couldn't enjoy each others company completely for fear of the end. In the long run it still hurts when it ends.

 

How do I know? I'm still recovering from a relationship that had an expiration date from the beginning.

[GrayClouds]

If a prophet came up to you and whispered in your ear, "If you get with this person, it will end in one year, five years, ten, etc." -- would you still do it? Do you really need forever to have wonderful experiences? And does the mortality of a relationship make what you shared any less precious?

 

Think about that a bit before you reply.

 

Thinking a bit more deeply on this, would this prophet appear in a dream like form similar to the visions David Carradine had of blind Master Poin in Kung Fu, a ghost like Obi-Wan Kenobi in the Empire Strikes Back, or in person like a menacing Charles Manson? An important question that would surely influence any response...

 

Ultimately thought either way I suspect (and specially so if it was presented by the Chucky Manson persona) I would answer in the positive perspective, and say:

 

All this would do is delay the opportunity to be in the relationship with the person for whom I was meant to be. And if this Yodi of love was so all knowing I would ask him to direct me to her so I could hurry up and start having them compliment my happy life.

 

This would allow me to give myself completely to the moment, not holding myself back in anticipation, as protection for the end. Which is what we have to do anyway if you really want the any relationship to work.

 

 

.

[CleverName]

I was forewarned that it was not a 'forever' thing by the man himself. So my head knew but my heart was hopeful. The heart is not logical. This would be an opportunity to make a logical choice without the involvement of the heart. How many great things would not exist of there were no heart in choices?

[Ms. Joolie]

If a prophet came up to you and whispered in your ear, "If you get with this person, it will end in one year, five years, ten, etc." -- would you still do it?

 

Sure. I would emotionally invest myself for X amount of years then. Sounds easy.

 

Do you really need forever to have wonderful experiences?

 

I only need today. Only now.

 

 

And does the mortality of a relationship make what you shared any less precious?

 

Now is always precious, and I would take the memories with me.

 

 

I really do think knowing the expiration date would be a cause of less anxiety, as I could plan/prepare for that. It's the unknown that worries me.

[DenverBachelor]

Really interesting responses. Now here is mine ...

 

Honestly, if that prophet told me that it would end in a year, two years, etc. -- I would feel the need to prove him wrong and show that the present is an ever expanding fluid where anything is possible.

 

My mind would realize that it would end, but my heart would push forth and try to make it last. I mean, it is the human thing to do, right?

 

But in the end, the experiences outweigh the temporal aspects. If it ends, it ends -- but those experiences make us who we are and force us to grow.

 

And in the end, every relationship will come to a conclusion. Whether by argument, death or something we couldn't even conceive or prepare for, the matter at hand is living in the moment -- and once we can grasp that, we've figured out how to let a moment last forever.

[madrugada]

Um ... yes.

[Bulldozed]

I would do it again. Knowing the anguish, frustration and financial dilemma I endured last year, it was the ex, who, shortly after our break up was the catalyst that led to my demise at work. I lost my job in October. However, a business that I started with a friend 2 years, ago is finally starting to take off as I've been working it full-time since then. So i have her to thank for this, of course, I'd rather she contract an STD from the current cheeseball she's dating then hear my thanks and appreciation....

[sean1970]

I don't think it is safe to extrapolate anything from the answers given without knowing each context. If this were known, the pain/experience/pleasure are all a matter of perspective and circumstance.

 

For example, a 35 year old might have answered the question differently were they 25. Children, career, status in life, all would have changed in 10 years. At 25, I might have accepted such a deal knowing I had time to for long term partner goals (a family for example). An elder person might jump at the chance to short term lease love again knowing they are in the twilight of their life.

Edited February 24, 2010 by sean1970

[carhill]

Though not particularly focused on romantic relationships, I essentially said the same thing:

 

If the prophet proposed the experience to be positive and finite, then absolutely. There is only one mortality.

 

30 years ago, about life in general. To me, even from a young age, it was the process, each day of living, which made and makes life valuable. Like morality, anything with a beginning has an end. It's the space in between which is the gift