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How Do I Overcome My Insecurities?


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Posted

I've posted a couple different threads on here before which I'm sure show clearly just how insecure I am when it comes to dating. In case you haven't read them or know me, I'm 22, a guy, and gay. I came out in September 2008 and ever since then I have had TERRIBLE dating experiences.

 

The first guy I dated ended up having a boyfriend, the second and third guys both dumped me without giving a good reason, the fourth guy just lost interest, the fifth guy was involved in an abusive relationship (we fell for each other while I was trying to help him get away from his jerk of a boyfriend), and the sixth said I was just too needy. The last guy I dated, who was actually my first REAL boyfriend, I ended up pushing away because of my insecurities.

 

And because I've had such bad luck in the dating world, I've become VERY insecure, even though I'm pretty chill in every other area of my life. I'm always terrified I'm going to end up alone, so I tend to fall quickly or perhaps come on too strongly. I don't know how to be confident like I used to be, and I'm afraid it's ruining my chances of ever finding a good guy.

 

I DO live in a conservative area; the closest semi-big city is about 45 minutes away. And though there are a lot of gay guys there, I've dated several of them, and I don't hang out there enough to know them all (and there really aren't THOUSANDS of guys there anyway). But even if I move to a big city, I know my insecurities will follow me.

 

My friends tell me that everyone is insecure when they first go into the dating world, but I doubt that.

 

Anyone else out there who used to be insecure and is now over it that can give me tips? I really need some help/advice here. :/

Posted

What exactly are you insecure about?

 

Being abandoned? Being alone? Not finding a partner?

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