Yamaha Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Ehh i dont know,id say looks are the most important thing over those qualities because if your very good looking personality flaws will be overlooked The alpha male screams status for women but if youre extremely good looking thta bring a women status on its own merit ]we like good looking hot guys [/b]probably as much or more then Men like hot women I have allot of married friends who are tired of f'in their Joe Average husband becasue he does nothing for them on a physical level and they picture his face being some young studs Most women arent that physically attracted to the Man theyre with they just couldnt do any better Tried to say out but if you guys listen to people like the above then you deserve to be humping your monkey by yourself. You need to figure out who's opinions mean something and put others on the ignore list.
thegreatmoose Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 (edited) Personality is big of course but looks have to be there to get a foot in the door A ugly dude with a good personality will be just a a friend Now you admit personality is a big deal. Maybe we are not as far apart as I thought on this issue. What about a decent, but not hot, looking guy with the good personality? Edited December 24, 2009 by thegreatmoose
LonelyGuy85 Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 How important are looks in total? I mean would looks be the key factor or would it be the deciding factor? I met a girl about 6 months and after first meeting her i didn't think she was stunning or anything, out of 10 i would have given her a 5/6, but the more i got to know her the more i started liking her, so now for me she sits at 9/10. I can lust after an attractive woman, but the truth is that i wouldn't try anything with anyone that i didn't find attractive overall, and more importantly it would have to be someone i could develop a relationship with. For me as long as they aren't overweight (Nothing against big gals but i used to be reasonably big but managed to shake that down to my athlete physique and i fear that backwards slide like Mr Frost fears Mr De-icer) then i can totally fall for someone with a great personality, but what are other peoples opinions?
v g Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 moose, in order to be a hit with the ladies, you must change from "nice guy" beta male into a self absorbed, jerk first class a-hole "alphamale". have no fear my friend, it CAN be done. i did myself Pretty sure that perspective has been around longer than you've been alive, but thanks for the reminder That said, I've seen some of the standoffs between good-looking 'nice' guys and the women who circle them. It's like no one will make a move How important are looks in total? I mean would looks be the key factor or would it be the deciding factor? I met a girl about 6 months and after first meeting her i didn't think she was stunning or anything, out of 10 i would have given her a 5/6, but the more i got to know her the more i started liking her, so now for me she sits at 9/10. I can lust after an attractive woman, but the truth is that i wouldn't try anything with anyone that i didn't find attractive overall, and more importantly it would have to be someone i could develop a relationship with. For me as long as they aren't overweight (Nothing against big gals but i used to be reasonably big but managed to shake that down to my athlete physique and i fear that backwards slide like Mr Frost fears Mr De-icer) then i can totally fall for someone with a great personality, but what are other peoples opinions? This is my exact story except I'm a female, and my ex was a 2/3 and then became a 9/10.
Yukikazi Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 If some girl says I'm a nice guy.. I go deadpan, look straight at her and tell her she is evil, turn around and walk away.
v g Posted December 24, 2009 Posted December 24, 2009 Sorry. Was too late to edit. moose, in order to be a hit with the ladies, you must change from "nice guy" beta male into a self absorbed, jerk first class a-hole "alphamale". have no fear my friend, it CAN be done. i did myself Skydiveaddict, please keep us apprised of your results. At least I wanna know. Pretty sure that perspective has been around longer than you've been alive, but thanks for the reminder That said, I've seen some of the standoffs between good-looking 'nice' guys and the women who circle them. It's like no one will make a move Absolutely hilarious!
thegreatmoose Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 This is my exact story except I'm a female, and my ex was a 2/3 and then became a 9/10. This shows that personality is most important to some women. From what I see on here, most women seem to think personality is extremely important.
TheBritishGuy Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I'm more of an observer than a poster but I thought I should comment on this thread as my advice might be helpful. When you class yourself as nice guy or sum your personality up in a single word you are doing yourself a grave injustice. People are made up of so many different parts and have so many traits. A human being is like a rainbow and when you try and sum up a rainbow by calling it black or white you end up missing essential elements of it that make it so pretty. You may have more yellow than the status quo or too little purple in your arc but at the end of the day you are a rainbow like everybody else. Leaving behind the Mary Poppins themed analogy the point I am making is you shouldn't classify yourself or mould yourself to adopt any singular personality as people are a lot more complex than that. My second point is about "being the right guy". Women are individuals and each woman respond to something else. Don't expect to come across a formula that works for all women. Maybe that'd work on Bionic women but you can never be the right guy. So that leaves you in one place. Being yourself. For the record there is a reason that gets mentioned a lot and it is because it is correct. End of the day I think Oscar Wilde said it best when he said: "It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious". See if your unconfident in yourself it doesn't matter whether your the baddest man on the planet or the nicest guy on the planet. The cracks are easy to see. On the other hand regardless of your personality if you have an aura that wreaks of charmisma and charm you have that effect on the people around you. Just learn to be comfortable with who and what you are and over time you will simply evolve to become the kind of person who can cast a spell on women around you. I will quote Oscar Wilde again in saying "Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong". Stop trying to correct yourself, better yourself yes but change yourself as a person to meet some shallow demographic, no.
skydiveaddict Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 [quote. Skydiveaddict, please keep us apprised of your results. At least I wanna know. Absolutely hilarious! Don't laugh so hard. i'm already seeing results
cognac Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Yeah, ever since getting 'friendzoned' a few times, I learned to treat women very differently than men, and I've gotten relatively good results. First off, I don't get friendzoned anymore, women tell me off the bat if they want me in the real way, or if they don't they just go away, which is actually pretty awesome. I don't have any qualms telling women what to do . And they listen. I also joke around a lot and I can tell they love it. I have no problem telling a woman she is an imbecile, etc, they love it. My personally gets me laid a lot more than if I was a so-called "nice guy". Only reason it doesn't work better is the chronic shortage of women.
TheLoneSock Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Yeah, ever since getting 'friendzoned' a few times, I learned to treat women very differently than men, and I've gotten relatively good results. First off, I don't get friendzoned anymore, women tell me off the bat if they want me in the real way, or if they don't they just go away, which is actually pretty awesome. I don't have any qualms telling women what to do . And they listen. I also joke around a lot and I can tell they love it. I have no problem telling a woman she is an imbecile, etc, they love it. My personally gets me laid a lot more than if I was a so-called "nice guy". Only reason it doesn't work better is the chronic shortage of women. I'm sure it's the shortage of women and not the shortage of something else.
cognac Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I'm sure it's the shortage of women and not the shortage of something else. I really hope you are just a troll, and not actually the man-infant you play on this forum: "*insert small penis joke* DERP! HAW HAWHUAWHUAWHAWH HAWW, *Drool*". Rinse and repeat for virtually any person you don't agree with with your lame feminine code of ethics. I strongly doubt you get laid nearly as much as you brag about over here either by the way
TheLoneSock Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I really hope you are just a troll, and not actually the man-infant you play on this forum: "*insert small penis joke* DERP! HAW HAWHUAWHUAWHAWH HAWW, *Drool*". Rinse and repeat for virtually any person you don't agree with with your lame feminine code of ethics. I strongly doubt you get laid nearly as much as you brag about over here either by the way That wasn't a small penis joke. It was a play on your height. It's funny that you assumed that though, that speaks volumes.
cognac Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 That wasn't a small penis joke. It was a play on your height. It's funny that you assumed that though, that speaks volumes. The Lone Whigger man-baby list of insults: 1) "U got a lil dik" 2) "U r short lolz" 3) "u mad gay"
Strych9 Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Nice guys are usally unpopular boring nerds who just read books for fun We want jerks allot of time becasue theyre popular and the life of the party that everyone likes and gravitates to No women wants a guy who just blends into the crowd and is not wanted by other women or Men We want the bad boy every women wants and Man wants to be with!!! I have to disagree, I definitely don't want a jerk or someone who's a "hit with the ladies". While you're right about men blending into the crowd, I find the jerky popular type to be the majority of this crowd. I love a nerdy man who reads books and doesn't submit to petty peer pressures!
carhill Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 I think I have a pair of those glasses, from the 70's, and what's with the hand gestures? IME, the ladies who don't submit to peer pressure and want the same from their men are few and far between. Your experiences and situations discussed elsewhere are likely why. You evidently have similar problems with men wanting a relationship with you as perceived nice guys do with women. IMO, the issues come from different places, but the effect is the same. Frustration
Strych9 Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 They are from the 70's! Aren't they hideous? Those are my hands on my breasts making a nice gesture to amplify the sweater. lol You are so right, if anything I am feeling less frustrated now since the gut spilling. I hope all of the "nice guys" out there will find acceptance to what they are and have to offer!
carhill Posted December 25, 2009 Posted December 25, 2009 Nothing like a lady in a nice sweater (turtleneck is my fav) in the winter. Less is more Stay warm and I hope Santa brings you what you want BTW, my glasses are originals, complete with taped bridge
v g Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Don't laugh so hard. i'm already seeing results Hey, skydiveaddict, the 'absolutely hilarious' comment was to something carhill had written. It wasn't directed to you.
skydiveaddict Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Hey, skydiveaddict, the 'absolutely hilarious' comment was to something carhill had written. It wasn't directed to you. oops i see that now sorry
b52s Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 Nothing like a lady in a nice sweater (turtleneck is my fav) in the winter. Less is more Stay warm and I hope Santa brings you what you want BTW, my glasses are originals, complete with taped bridge Indeed....and with her hands on her "Sweater Puppies" lol
threebyfate Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 I think it all boils down to two things: These self-professed nice guys are clueless about social cues and expect that with every woman, they will react the same way, if they do [insert action].They're self-entitled, spoiled brats, unwilling to work on themselves.
alphamale Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 any man who expects the woman to take the lead in the initial stages of dating is passive-aggressive. its the mans job to seek out an appropriate date and ask her out and then organize the date, et al....
sagetalk Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 This topic is as old as dating I'd imagine. Do jerks get the girl? Yes, of course, every male alive knows that. The confusion comes from this term "nice guy". Very few guys actually fall into the nice guy category, and I think they can be very successful at getting women but it's much much harder. Being a cocky/funny jerk is the easy path and most successful men take it and have a blast. A nice guy is a poorly defined term. It is not a loser, or a shy guy, or a doormate. A nice guy is a guy that wants a dating relationship with a women based on compatibility, affection, honesty, and loyalty. This is in direct contrast with most cocky/funny alpha males who base relationships on: sex, sex, sex, grabbing, sex, foreplay, sex, her naked body, her chest, her legs, sex, her breasts, frequency of sex, and sex. Most nice guys could have sex with lots of women, but they choose to reserve it for only a select few. Characteristics of nice guys would be: moves very slowly in dating, deep religious commitments, typically are virgins, pays for dates, initiates deep conversations before even holding a girl's hand, slow to kiss, very slow to have sex (years usually, not months), never makes remarks about physical shortcomings of a girl, little if any physical contact early on, smiles alot, makes lots of eye contact. If any guy fits most of those above, then bingo, you've found a nice guy. I would say fewer than 5% of the male population are actually nice guys. An excellent example are the Jonas brothers. They are the exact definition of nice guys. Very few men are able to pull this off, but I commend any man that has landed a hottie using this lifestyle. To me, they are the shining example of how men should be, and if I have sons, I hope they choose the nice guy path .
Woggle Posted December 26, 2009 Posted December 26, 2009 A few years from now you will hear a ton of stuff come out about the Jonas Brothers that will shatter the nice guy myth.
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