fooled once Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 (edited) I do not believe everyone cheats. To me, that is a ridiculous thing to even think (that everyone cheats). I have never cheated on anyone. I know my H has never cheated on anyone. It's easy for people to say they will never cheat.. when they've only been married for 2-3 years.. or they are still in their 20s-30s... Got married at 22, divorced at 31 - never cheated. Got married 34 - been married almost 12 years - never cheated. Edited December 19, 2009 by fooled once
fooled once Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 What I mean was that any woman is pumped up right will cheat on her husband. Women pretty much have zero loyalty to the men in their lives. Bull. So many generalizations on this thread.... If someone wants to meet a man who loves his wife, let me introduce you to my husband. He won't cheat on me and hasn't cheated on me. That is "his" thing. He is trustworthy, loyal and tooks his vows seriously. It is actually sad that so many haven't know a happily married man. They are out there.
SimplyBeingLoved Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Not everyone cheats. But a heck of a lot do. What I wonder is, how many "walk-aways" leave marriages without having someone else lined up. Everyone says one should leave the marriage first, before giving into temptation. I agree with that too. But how many really do?
OWW Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Not everyone cheats. But a heck of a lot do. What I wonder is, how many "walk-aways" leave marriages without having someone else lined up. Everyone says one should leave the marriage first, before giving into temptation. I agree with that too. But how many really do? Do you mean folks who have been tempted and walk away? Or just generally walk away from a bad marriage?
mem11363 Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 LOL. It is very hard to prove a negative - often easy to prove a positive. You ask me if I have already read a certain book. I say yes. You request I prove it. I then immediately tell you a ton of stuff that is in the book - case closed. You ask me if I read a different book. I say no. You say prove it. How can I do that. How can I prove I did NOT read a book. Woggle this isn't about me - I am happily married and plan to stay that way until death do us part. My wife has been consistent and honest with me and our friends, extended family and random people we meet for 20 years. She is genuinely a good person. Yes she is strong willed and there have been times I felt she was mean to me. She has made me cry - and made me feel bad at times during our marriage. But for everything she has done wrong - she has done 10 or 20 things right. And when I see how kind and loving she is to infants and very old people I feel proud to be married to her. I think you also are married to a very good woman. I hope you somehow learn to love her the way she loves you. Really Woggle while I am sorry for your past misadventures I think you seem to have lost sight of the fact that men and women both have the same bell curve of good, bad and indifferent members of our genders. Have you seen a therapist? Are you not taking your meds? Sure she walked away. That is what she tells you.
Woggle Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 Bull. So many generalizations on this thread.... If someone wants to meet a man who loves his wife, let me introduce you to my husband. He won't cheat on me and hasn't cheated on me. That is "his" thing. He is trustworthy, loyal and tooks his vows seriously. It is actually sad that so many haven't know a happily married man. They are out there. Do you love him as much as he loves you?
Woggle Posted December 19, 2009 Posted December 19, 2009 meme11363 you mention that she is nice to old people and infants but is she nice to you?
BED OF ROSES Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I just wanted to throw this question out there because I saw this on another site and it is getting some interesting responses. While I know the obvious answer is no. It does seem like a majority have (myself included). My Dad cheated on his ex wife and my mom cheated on her ex husband and my dad. My Husband cheated on me and well it just seems like a lot of people cheat. I am not happy about being a BS or WS I wish this stuff just didn't happen. My view of monogamy is pretty much shattered. Would love to hear your views on this. I think that every Man that has the opportunity to cheat with someone he is attracted to will cheat. However, I do not think that every woman cheats and some women I think are incapable of cheating. Monogamy in my view is a social construct, albeit a noble one, but highly unrealistic.
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Not everyone cheats. But a heck of a lot do. What I wonder is, how many "walk-aways" leave marriages without having someone else lined up. Everyone says one should leave the marriage first, before giving into temptation. I agree with that too. But how many really do? There are some of us out there. Didn't have anyone lined up, still don't. Not looking for anyone. I am not dead, so I have seen some pretty hot looking men that I have given more than a second glance and more than a passing thought to. Maybe they even gave me that "twing";)....the end.
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I think that every Man that has the opportunity to cheat with someone he is attracted to will cheat. However, I do not think that every woman cheats and some women I think are incapable of cheating. Monogamy in my view is a social construct, albeit a noble one, but highly unrealistic. Too all the faithful men out there who it is assumed that you have no morals when it comes to temptation..... I salute you. But I hate to inform you that you are part of a construct so you can't possible be faithful. You were mistaken, you aren't really faithful to your wife when that nice pair of inviting tits walks past you attached to that more than willing participant. It is a figment of your imagination, a dream, better yet an illusion. You could not have possibly made that decision, you aren't equipped to make that choice. Sorry.
Fallen Angel Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Too all the faithful men out there who it is assumed that you have no morals when it comes to temptation..... I salute you. But I hate to inform you that you are part of a construct so you can't possible be faithful. You were mistaken, you aren't really faithful to your wife when that nice pair of inviting tits walks past you attached to that more than willing participant. It is a figment of your imagination, a dream, better yet an illusion. You could not have possibly made that decision, you aren't equipped to make that choice. Sorry. LMAO @ bent... while I thought the same thing, there is NO WAY i could have written it ANY better!
BED OF ROSES Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Too all the faithful men out there who it is assumed that you have no morals when it comes to temptation..... I salute you. But I hate to inform you that you are part of a construct so you can't possible be faithful. You were mistaken, you aren't really faithful to your wife when that nice pair of inviting tits walks past you attached to that more than willing participant. It is a figment of your imagination, a dream, better yet an illusion. You could not have possibly made that decision, you aren't equipped to make that choice. Sorry. The post clearly asks what we think...I stated what I think. If you disagree that's fine but your passive aggressive response is neither warranted nor appreciated. Tsk tsk...your bitterness is showing.
Woggle Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I had a woman literally invite me up to her hotel room on a business trip. She was from out of town and my wife was not there so I could have done it and easily gotten away with it but yet I still did not cheat. Sorry to burst your bubble but every man is not governed by his penis.
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 The post clearly asks what we think...I stated what I think. If you disagree that's fine but your passive aggressive response is neither warranted nor appreciated. Tsk tsk...your bitterness is showing. I wish I had a buck for every time the bitterness crap gets tossed about I would be rich by now:lmao: As far as passive aggressive....you got me mixed up with someone else...passive I am not. And since my post was addressed to the men....why do you even care? Tsk tsk, your issues are showing.
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I had a woman literally invite me up to her hotel room on a business trip. She was from out of town and my wife was not there so I could have done it and easily gotten away with it but yet I still did not cheat. Sorry to burst your bubble but every man is not governed by his penis. Good for you. She those moving tits didn't make you drool and your brain stop functioning.
tami-chan Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I think that every Man that has the opportunity to cheat with someone he is attracted to will cheat. However, I do not think that every woman cheats and some women I think are incapable of cheating. Monogamy in my view is a social construct, albeit a noble one, but highly unrealistic. I agree with this for the most part-as I think women are capable of the same. I believe, for example, if Woggle was thousands of miles away from his wife and "trapped" on a deserted Island with a woman who happens to be his type-kind, beautiful and attracted to him...he would reconsider cheating on his wife-especially if he does not know if he will be rescued from the island. If he develops an intimate, emotional relationship with the woman, maybe life in that deserted island won't be so bad.....you are free to disagree, Woggle It is like stealing....what if you are starving (haven't eaten for days) and you came upon a cottage, with no one inside and find that somebody had left a box of cereal on the porch..you do not even have to break in the house...would you take it? if you take it, it is stealing...if you don't ..well..point is, until your very life or sanity is tested or threatened you cannot know what you are capable of doing....
AD1980 Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 No but allot do Its amazing how many people i see at my job who claim theyre in happy relationships end up cheating with a co worker.. A few women who always talked about how great their husbands are but all it took was this smooth talking great looking guy to constantly show them attention and give out commpliments and these women couldnt contain themselves.. This scumbag even told me how hes been with hundred of married women and how he can get almost any of em just by givign them compliments,sad part is he may not be lyign even though hes a dirtbag.. I think Men and Women are the same in that if some person of the oppsoite sex who you thought was amazing looking and maybe thought u had no chance with hit on you while married 99.9 of us would take that opportuintiy to cheat..
Simon Attwood Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I just wanted to throw this question out there because I saw this on another site and it is getting some interesting responses. While I know the obvious answer is no. It does seem like a majority have (myself included). My Dad cheated on his ex wife and my mom cheated on her ex husband and my dad. My Husband cheated on me and well it just seems like a lot of people cheat. I am not happy about being a BS or WS I wish this stuff just didn't happen. My view of monogamy is pretty much shattered. Would love to hear your views on this. A slight twist Everyone has the potential to cheat. Given enough motive, everyone will cheat. The secret is motive. Some logical stats that I just made up A successful, rich man is more likely to cheat than a poor man ... the reason behind it is, a successful, rich man is more attractive to certain females (would it be controversial to suggest most? Even if I add a disclaimer to say that; although many might not act upon it?). So for the rich man, there is greater temptation More attractive females are more likely to cheat ... reason again, is; the more attractive the female the more attention she will get from the opposite sex, so again, greater temptation. OK that is vastly simplified, and there would be other contributing factors, but I think you'd find that the above would be true, statistically. There is an accepted truth in sexual psychology, that a woman is often driven by her "sexual value". If the woman feels that her sexual value is low, for whatever reason, whether provoked, or whether innate. She will try to raise her sexual value, one of the methods she will use is to withold sex so that the male has to try harder, the harder he is prepared to try, the more sexually valued the female feels. This is essentially pandering to primitive instincts. But it has a flip side, it can be counterproductive to the female's goal; the male may just look elsewhere for an easier shag. So there we have another motive. It is a sad truth that we as a species are almost entirely unconscious of how much we provoke and manipulate the people closest to us, in to behaviours that become self fulfilling prophecies that confirm our worst fears.
atlnay Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Do You Think Everyone Cheats? No. I think men are more likely to cheat than women, but I think if I man has all HIS needs being met, the desire for him to cheat will diminish (provided all things being equal and he's not a sex addict). While it may never fully go away, he'll rise to the challenge and tame it.
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 No. I think men are more likely to cheat than women, but I think if I man has all HIS needs being met, the desire for him to cheat will diminish (provided all things being equal and he's not a sex addict). While it may never fully go away, he'll rise to the challenge and tame it. Quintative studies say this isn't true, but people belief systems that say it is true don't change. As far as the needs being met, it is the most overused justification for not being mature enough to handle issues within a marriage like a responsible adult. While there are true sex addicts, it is mainly used now as a label that explains being an azz hole and garners some sympathy which is still a justification for being having like a dog in heat.
Simon Attwood Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Quite simply; Most men, especially ones on here that are going through some kind of separation or relationship conflict, will say that more women cheat than men. Most women, especially ones on here that are going through some kind of separation or relationship conflict, will say that more men cheat than women. Our perspectives are inevitably tinted by our prejudices.
Woggle Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Quite simply; Most men, especially ones on here that are going through some kind of separation or relationship conflict, will say that more women cheat than men. Most women, especially ones on here that are going through some kind of separation or relationship conflict, will say that more men cheat than women. Our perspectives are inevitably tinted by our prejudices. Very true. Both genders cheat though I think men get a bad rap when there are plenty of female cheaters as well.
bentnotbroken Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 Very true. Both genders cheat though I think men get a bad rap when there are plenty of female cheaters as well. As I have said, studies say it is almost dead even. When taking all variables into account.
Owl Posted December 21, 2009 Posted December 21, 2009 I also believe that MOST men cheat.. more than women .. still.. eventhough women stats.. are going up... but still women don't cheat for the same reason.. I also believe that ALL men would cheat if they have the opportunity to have the woman of their dreams.. and knowing for sure they would NEVER get caught.. Do you not believe that most women wouldn't also cheat if they had the opportunity to be "with" the man of their dreams and knew that they would NEVER get caught? I don't think that this is limited to men...just my opinion.
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