Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 Demonstrating that you are doing fine without him and moving on takes his power, shows him hes losing a lot more then you are. My ex does this any chance she gets. His reply is his attempt to take back some of that power, I could send you a Dozen E-mail exchanges just like that from my wife. He is trying desperately to paint you as the bad person here and he will do that any chance he gets. Your E-mail proved otherwise. Let him play his game. TOJAZ Does it ever end? My therapist told me the same thing other's say on here....don't answer the phone, let em leave a VM. Don't return the call unless it is about the child. Don't return text messages or emails unless it's about the child...etc. She asked me if I was happy with my house....I told her no right now...too many memories, but I am working out new decorating plans and repainting the entire interior...my way.
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 Does it ever end? My therapist told me the same thing other's say on here....don't answer the phone, let em leave a VM. Don't return the call unless it is about the child. Don't return text messages or emails unless it's about the child...etc. She asked me if I was happy with my house....I told her no right now...too many memories, but I am working out new decorating plans and repainting the entire interior...my way. Wish I knew, hasn't for me yet, but thats because I'm stupid. I let her throw that bait out there, and privately, I always swallow the hook. I never answer her mails, texts, etc. but it still sets my mind into a tailspin, I'm there right now. I know what you mean about the house, i'm in the same boat over here. TOJAZ
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 Wish I knew, hasn't for me yet, but thats because I'm stupid. I let her throw that bait out there, and privately, I always swallow the hook. I never answer her mails, texts, etc. but it still sets my mind into a tailspin, I'm there right now. I know what you mean about the house, i'm in the same boat over here. TOJAZ I think you should make a trophy room.....dedicated to the New England Patriots of course.
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 I think you should make a trophy room.....dedicated to the New England Patriots of course. :( Well, it's been nice being friends with you Trippi. Go Pack Go:rolleyes::rolleyes:
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 :( Well, it's been nice being friends with you Trippi. Go Pack Go:rolleyes::rolleyes: LMAO!!! Knew that would get you laughing!! :lmao::bunny::bunny:
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 Thanks I needed a laugh. Guess we can be friends again LoL! Must admit that I did enjoy a Patriot game last season, LOVED!!! watching pretty boy break his leg! LOL
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 Thanks I needed a laugh. Guess we can be friends again LoL! Must admit that I did enjoy a Patriot game last season, LOVED!!! watching pretty boy break his leg! LOL Well, he needed the time off to marry his model girlfriend. LOL!
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 Well, he needed the time off to marry his model girlfriend. LOL! Oh yeah, forgot about that. :mad: really hate him now!
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 God wants her to know... ... that doubt is the rust of life. Doubt holds you landlocked in paralysis unable to move either way. The time you spent doubting is the time you are not alive. So, rid yourself of the doubt, take that step one way or another, your heart knows what is best, but take it right now. Guess God was right, I sent the check for my retainer fee for the attorney.
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 These messages from god are getting scary! Tell me about it....and I would have to say that anyone who is willing to spend four figures on an attorney....um, well, that is moving on....
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 Ouch! I think only one person is questioning that your moving on.
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 Ouch! I think only one person is questioning that your moving on. *L* You know, you're right. I hate what he has become, I hate what he is now and I know that it is over....there's nothing left of him that I would even want back.....time to get on with life and start living again....that is what I want for myself....but it is him that brought us to this. It's sad, but and I could think of a lot of fun that could have come from spending that....but in the end, it's necessary.
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 Yes it is necessary. A relationship where only one person is giving there all is not going to be a relationship for long. In the end it will be money well spent releasing yourself from his drinking and other unhealthy habits.
FeelingLonely98 Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 I need to move on with my life because he already has...but I have been spending the past couple of weeks doing that already mentally making new goals for myself. My goals no longer include him in my life. I really don't feel anything for him, ... I thought that I saw something in him that was genuine and caring, ...but I wasn't the one who left....and I wouldn't have left him ... It just doesn't work when only one person is working on the relationship. Eventually, that person gives up and I guess I did. ...In the meantime, I'm going to keep on being who I am, work on new goals that work for me and love my son everyday unconditionally... I'm not even angry, ... I wonder what Karma has in store for me next time. Wow trippi - Looks like I'm in the same place as you - been about two weeks for me. Most of your comments I quoted above I could have written. I still feel like I love her but I don't choose to invest anymore emotion into a hopeless M - because of her I feel my heart has been drained of any feeling for her as a W. GOOD LUCK. PEACE!
FeelingLonely98 Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 I wonder what Karma has in store for me next time. I hope you feel positive that only good Karma is in your future!! I am trying to believe that is the case for me. (Though right now I don't know how I would ever trust a woman again!)
Author trippi1432 Posted October 15, 2009 Author Posted October 15, 2009 I wonder what Karma has in store for me next time. I hope you feel positive that only good Karma is in your future!! I am trying to believe that is the case for me. (Though right now I don't know how I would ever trust a woman again!) I know what you mean, it took me a very long time to trust with my heart again after my first husband, had no idea what was in store for me with this husband and it hurt very much to finally trust that much again. The one thing that I have decided this time is that I am not looking to fall in love and do that whole thing over again....I want to find myself, live for myself for a while....if love is meant to be for me, it will find me. I feel that if I allow myself to live a little first and accomplish all the things I want to do in life, then maybe I will be able to settle down again in five to ten years and not feel jaded.
tojaz Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 For me, I think it's best just to move without a plan. It keeps you free to really live for yourself. If you plan to shy away from love, you never know what you may pass up,my best love happened when I wasn't looking for it, and if your looking for love, you may try to force it and wind up unhappy with someone who just fills the void. I just try to survive each day, no major life goals or deadlines right now, I wake up live as happily as I can and put another day of life in the books. It dosen't always workout well, but it's gotten my this far. TOJAZ
Auroracoladybug Posted October 15, 2009 Posted October 15, 2009 I second that Tojaz...Trippi good for you! FL98 I think you will find that trust in the right person.
FeelingLonely98 Posted October 16, 2009 Posted October 16, 2009 I second that Tojaz...Trippi good for you! FL98 I think you will find that trust in the right person. Thanks ACLB ... I hope so. I really love the emotional part of a relationship and the companionship as well. We'll see. Thanks to you to Trippi and tojaz --> wise words for me to hear!! PEACE!
Author trippi1432 Posted October 16, 2009 Author Posted October 16, 2009 Ok, got a text from ex that stated that he would help me out and that he didn't hate me....yeah...who cares....right? Home now! Had a great time tonight....just scary drive home.
tojaz Posted October 16, 2009 Posted October 16, 2009 Ok, got a text from ex that stated that he would help me out and that he didn't hate me....yeah...who cares....right? Thats quite a change of direction from a few days ago! Wonder what hes going to help you out with? Debt? My guess is his attorney set him straight on what he is actually liable for and now wants to make nice, just judging from what is here. Home now! Had a great time tonight....just scary drive home. Nice to hear you had a good time despite the music, also glad to hear you made it home safe. TOJAZ
Author trippi1432 Posted October 16, 2009 Author Posted October 16, 2009 Thats quite a change of direction from a few days ago! Wonder what hes going to help you out with? Debt? My guess is his attorney set him straight on what he is actually liable for and now wants to make nice, just judging from what is here. Most likely a guilty conscience, he can't afford an attorney. At any rate, where money matters are concerned....not speaking to him about it anymore....ignored text, my attorney can deal with him when I meet her next week....she's getting paid well to put up with the aggravation which should buy me some peace of mind.
Gunny376 Posted October 16, 2009 Posted October 16, 2009 For me? Its just easier being single, who needs the drama? One thing about being single? You can't go wrong by yourself. You always know where your at in your life. Mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially. Yea it takes some getting used to once you've been in a LTR. The truth of the matter is (IMHO) is that most people just aren't cut out for LTR's (more so men than women). I don't necessarily believe in the "One" but if there is such? The few and far between.
Author trippi1432 Posted October 16, 2009 Author Posted October 16, 2009 For me? Its just easier being single, who needs the drama? One thing about being single? You can't go wrong by yourself. You always know where your at in your life. Mentally, emotionally, spiritually, financially. Yea it takes some getting used to once you've been in a LTR. The truth of the matter is (IMHO) is that most people just aren't cut out for LTR's (more so men than women). I don't necessarily believe in the "One" but if there is such? The few and far between. I agree, it is easier being single....but I'm not going to totally give up that there is someone out there that is "real". I may not ever marry again....just think it is bad luck for me...lol. But I do know that I want to share my life with someone who I have something in common with and enjoy being around.
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