boogieboy Posted June 22, 2009 Share Posted June 22, 2009 Im going to give you some advice that may sound harsh, but you need to hear this. What I think actually happened is that she talked you into going along with what she wants (doing your own thing, but 'staying in touch') by giving you false hopes. First, let me make one thing clear, shes only going to be in touch when she feels like it, and everything will be 100% on her terms. Shes not going to be there for you, and realistically, all you did by agreeing to her terms is let her know that she can come back anytime she wants. Shes going to go out looking for new men to date, and chances are, she will never think of you romantically again. You need to go NC, and forget about getting back together. Almost every woman Ive been dumped by has given me the same 'who knows what tomorrow will bring' crap, and its just that - crap. She has no intentions of getting back together with you, the very idea is nonsensical. If she doesnt want to be with you today, why would tomorrow, next month, or next year be any different? It wont. She just wanted to relieve some guilt. Stay as far away from her as possible, stop talking to her all together, and focus on moving on. I went though the same shyte. Its all true. Move on, dont keep contacting her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 001bh Posted June 27, 2009 Author Share Posted June 27, 2009 I think this NC stuff is cold and immature. Sorry guys. I feel that we can be friends no matter what. I take a bullet for her so to speak even if it wasn't meant to be. Talked with her again. If she wants to try new things, that's fine by me. I'd rather she find out what new things are like now then be stuck with me and never know what it's like and let temptation get the better of her or myself. We're both young, and both agree that marriage is not something sensible until at least our 30s. We both need to concentrate on getting our educations refined i.e. grad schools. And who knows maybe we'll be back in the end, we can't know what we don't know (a Buddhist monk taught me that one.) Yes this will hurt me, but whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger. And no I'm not religious in case anyone is asking. Link to post Share on other sites
boogieboy Posted June 27, 2009 Share Posted June 27, 2009 I think this NC stuff is cold and immature. Sorry guys. I feel that we can be friends no matter what. I take a bullet for her so to speak even if it wasn't meant to be. Talked with her again. If she wants to try new things, that's fine by me. I'd rather she find out what new things are like now then be stuck with me and never know what it's like and let temptation get the better of her or myself. We're both young, and both agree that marriage is not something sensible until at least our 30s. We both need to concentrate on getting our educations refined i.e. grad schools. And who knows maybe we'll be back in the end, we can't know what we don't know (a Buddhist monk taught me that one.) Yes this will hurt me, but whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger. And no I'm not religious in case anyone is asking. Well you wont find out for another year while shes stringing you along, but this will kill you until you realize that youre torturing yourself for nothing and she will NEVER get back with you. Its wont make you stronger either. Then you will realize that you wasted a year being a pussy for this woman, but if you want to learn the hard way, keep false hope alive...... BTW use the search function on this board, lookup "take a break" and see how many threads there are of people like you that wasted months learning the hard way, and see if you think you know what youre talking about. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 001bh Posted August 28, 2009 Author Share Posted August 28, 2009 It's been some time now, i've gone NC and I'm feeling better. So far she hasn't tried to contact me which is good. The more I think or her, the more I resent her for doing this to me. So I'm just going to see what happens and try to meet new people. thanks everyone! Link to post Share on other sites
Peanut9330 Posted September 3, 2009 Share Posted September 3, 2009 I know how you feel and it’s good that you went NC, I know NC is a hard concept in the beginning but after time you realize that it’s necessary in order to be able to heal. I been through this and after reading your post its good that you finally started NC trust me in the long run it will benefit you. Time heals all and believe me I’m over the break up and the NC phase and the hope, and I feel great and in time so will you!! But NC is the key so keep it up! Link to post Share on other sites
JL911 Posted September 4, 2009 Share Posted September 4, 2009 We all have the same story....When a girl breaks up they always hit you with the one liners, "I still want to be friends"...."I dont want you out of my life"....When in turn their actions are saying the exact opposite. Its really hard to love someone who doesnt love you...In fact it is impossible...The BS lines you were fed were so far from the truth its not even funny. My ex gave me the whole "I could marry you, but..." which is just complete garbage...Its so hard when at the end you are the one hanging on trying everything you can, while they are just letting you go... It's so painful when you love someone and have the best intentions at heart for them and they are just walking away from you...It is shocking and puts you in a state of confusion...You ask yourself why?, or how could this happen to me? a lot... A month in, I'm still so sad and miss her so much. I know I was a good BF and that will not be an easy find again...Ill be happy again someday though, shes gone...Nothing more I can do about it... You have to cut them off...go through the process...then move on to better things...It might not be right away, but it will come... Link to post Share on other sites
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