destiny64 Posted May 19, 2009 Posted May 19, 2009 is it strange to want to move out to find yourself? Is there really such a thing?? Howm any women go through a midlife crisis?? Children leave home and i feel the need to be alone. My husband is my friend but we haent made love in at least 6 months. We dont even fight. I just need time alone. Does this make sense, has any other women did this to figure themselves out?
tojaz Posted May 30, 2009 Posted May 30, 2009 Thats kind of the story my wife gave me for wanting a divorce. So I guess it does happen. It wasn't quite the same thing as she is not midlife age yet and we had been happy until she "Threw the switch" were talking within hours not months. My story>>> http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t190291/ As being on the recieving end of the "finding myself" I would be curious as to what all that means. I love my wife more then anything in the world and don't see how our marriage gets in the way of her finding herself. Please share if your willing, I'm sure there are others here that would like to know. TOJAZ
TaraMaiden Posted May 31, 2009 Posted May 31, 2009 I suspect you have fallen out of love with your husband. We can take vows of matrimony promising through thick and thin 'until death us do part' - but it doesn't mean years down the line we will still mean it. How about wearing a skimpy tank top, a mini skirt and platform heels? Ridiculous, isn't it? Maybe once upon a time, but - now? What would I look like?? Tastes change, people change.... the only guarantee that is constant and unchanging, is that everything is inconstant and changing. What kept you together? Just the children? Or would you actually like to love him again? If the thought makes you yearn for the way you were, try to work on it. You can never go back. Things will never be the way they were. Too much has happened. But if you value the relationship and want it to proceed, you need to be completely honest with him, and agree to both work on it. If you do not value the relationship and want to call it a day, you need to be completely honest with him, and agree to both call it a day.
TroyNJ Posted June 1, 2009 Posted June 1, 2009 is it strange to want to move out to find yourself? Is there really such a thing?? Howm any women go through a midlife crisis?? Children leave home and i feel the need to be alone. My husband is my friend but we haent made love in at least 6 months. We dont even fight. I just need time alone. Does this make sense, has any other women did this to figure themselves out? complete nonsense, did u need to "find" yourself when you married him? There has to be more to this Story.
Andy L Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 OK people here... when you are saying "nonsense"... But six months without sex intercourse shows exactly the problems... Sorry for you, but doesn't he want a doctor and you both trying MC? All the best!
LisaUk Posted July 14, 2009 Posted July 14, 2009 Hi, yes women do go through midlife crisis, saying I need to find myself kind of implies a dissatisfaction with self, depression. Seek medical help and counselling, let your husband in on what's going on so he can support you through this, after all a midlife is not about your marriage, it is about a depression and transition you are going through, which we ALL have to go through, how you choose to deal with it will determine if it becomes a crisis rather than a transition. If you want some reading have a look at anything by the Psychologist Jung, who coined the theory of midlife tranisition. This doesn't have to become a crisis, so talk to your husband and you can work through it together, you can FIND yourself ( which essentially translates to intergrating the parts of the persona long ago suppressed), whilst remaining in your marriage.
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