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To trust or not to trust?


what2do

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The girl I'm seeing at the mo is possibly the biggest flirt I have ever met. I considered myself to be a flirt, but she just takes the biscuit. When I first met her, she came on to me, and I was put off because I thought she was arrogant, yet eventually surcumed to her charm.

 

We started seeing eachother, but as we were far away from eachother, it was on a when were together were together, when were not, were not basis.

 

I grew to like her more, and said I didn't want to get hurt so if she wanted to see me, it would have to be exclusive. She agreed, with a little hesitation.

 

Before when she flirted, it didn't bother me, but she is stilll flirting to the same extent now. I don't beleive in holding someone back, yet I thought she was going to kiss another guy pretty much infront of my face the other night. She was drunk, but I thought it was disrespectfull, and would never have done it myself. Since then she has apologised perfusly, and I think she meant it. I just don't know if I'm being synical after my last experiences of women.

 

She always says she is scared of relationships, as she has been treated so badly in the past. It feels like she is always playing games - trying to get me to run after her etc. After getting to know her more I have realised that she is incredably insecure, yet I'm not sure whether I'm just too soft - and sh'es playing me for a fool.

 

I have also been really hurt in the past, and am scared of a relationship, but I'm willing to give it a go as I really like her, yet part of me wonders how genuine she is, especially by the way that she flirts.

 

I seriously wonder whether there has been sexual and physical abuse in her past, and at times she has hinted, but I'm not sure. Do I trust her or not?

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Hey.

 

I have to say i was like that in the beginning of my relationship (not anymore though) And i never flirted to much. But i think you should trust her. I mean u cant harrass her and moan at her about flirting. Sometimes us women find it hard not to flirt. But u have to belive her.

 

If i were you i would try and find out about the past (sexual abuse). As a few of my friends have been in that situation it always helps to talk. Next time she hints towards something u ask her what shes on about (in a nice way). Also lots of compliments to get her confidence up a bit. She proberly flirts to get attention and to feel someone finds her sexy or whatever.

But you have to do that, Its your job! I know how hard it is to please us sometimes but we do sometimes think we look great.

 

Maybe you and her should sit down have a chat.. Tell her u dont like her flirting as she is ur girlfriend and it hurts you to see her do that. I am sorry i have not been much help but goodluck to you mate

Take

Care

Christine

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