Spectre Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 I hope it was a one off because you were feeling scared and wanted to test the water , only time will tell though. Don't give them ideas for excuses. Feeling scared shouldn't make a person cheat, and if you need to "test the water" then you definitely are not in love. Link to post Share on other sites
Author janinenm Posted April 17, 2009 Author Share Posted April 17, 2009 First ask yourself how you could spend the entire night kissing some guy if you were "in love" with this man? Oh believe me I have asked myself this question many times. So you don't believe anyone in the beginning stages of falling in love - with all the insecurity, fear and anxiety that feelings aren't returned, well in my case almost an expectation that my feelings weren't returned or mutual, wouldn't have a moment of bad bad judgement. You keep talking about how he is such a great guy and bla bla, if he is that great, then again..why cheat on him? He can't be that great, since you had to cheat on him to realize you "love" him. He was so great that I felt that I didn't deserve him. I still don't feel I do. There is no question that he is a great guy, fantastic, wonderful, better than me in a lot of ways. I didn't have to cheat on him to realise this or that I was in love - I already knew I loved him, but only told him this after the cheating because I thought it was my last chance to ever let him know (was expecting a breakup). You also say if he had acted more in love like he's acting now, you would of never done what you did. Soo..now it's partly his fault? He didn't show you enough love so you thought he would cheat on you, so you went and then cheated on him? said cheating happened because you thought he would do it to you, so in turn you did it to him. Wrong. It never crossed my mind that he would ever cheat on me. Out of the question. He wasn't good at expressing emotions or feelings, or 'acting in love', but fear that he would cheat on me was never an issue. The two are completely unrelated. The most outwardly affectionate guys with all the smooth talk and romantic gestures, especially in public, in experience are the ones I have found to be the most flirtatious and prone to cheating kind of behaviour. Those who are more reserved with their emotions are the opposite. Anyways, I have to say, this guy seems like he deserves someone a lot better. If he is so great stay away from him and introduce him to a girl who deserves him. I have done everything I can to deserve him since I slipped up. I don't know that I ever will, but it's not going to stop me trying. If something amazing happened to you that was unexplainable, or undeserved, like a promotion when you had been lazy at work, wouldn't you do your utmost from that point onwards to be deserving of such a good thing? And do your best to do it justice? Link to post Share on other sites
fella Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 your boyfriend is either exceedingly forgiving, why i don't know, or he sounds like a bit of a pussy to be honest. saying that, he might just love you. something inside him is eating away and it will do so forever. he might put all that on the back burner for a while but don't be surprised if this act of yours rears it ugly head in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
AAlike Posted April 17, 2009 Share Posted April 17, 2009 something inside him is eating away and it will do so forever. he might put all that on the back burner for a while but don't be surprised if this act of yours rears it ugly head in the future. yep, that's exactly what i'm saying. I think it's completely feasible that your relationship can get past this, but there needs to be a conflict before there can be a resolution. Link to post Share on other sites
cheeky_ricxz24 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 If you did it you should admit it and tell him why obviously he would be hurt and he worst part is he will lose some trust in you because you really didn't think about him while you were doing that. You should think about your guy before you do something because if you don't you might end up losing him because you didn't took care of your relationship and I think that time you took him for granted. Link to post Share on other sites
samsungxoxo Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Still don't see how this is still an issue to her. Ok so she cheated by kissing another man and told boyfriend, since that he never mentions it again so good. I mean anyone would get so damn tired of them repeatly mentioning about it, that would be boring. If it was just a kiss and yet they still mention it even after a year then yea, that would be frustrating. Such likely I would send them to hell. I would probably be like ''Alright enough already it's not like a had sex with someone geez''. So she shouldn't even mention it if he hasn't say a word about it, why ruin it if their relationship is even better than before. No point to it. Link to post Share on other sites
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