Behrman Posted October 1, 2003 Share Posted October 1, 2003 Ok, I wont get into my long back story with my girlfriend or anything unless need be, but I do have one simple question. When a girl says "Oh, you didnt have to" or "You really dont have to", but doesnt seem upset, does that mean that she actually wants you to? Like when I spend time with my girlfriend after school, she says I dont have to and I can go home, but I tell her I want to. Is she asking that hinting that I'm kind of smothering her, or is she actually hinting that she likes it? Her tone is never mean or anything, but it's just something I was wondering. And tonight, I talked to her on AIM and she said her sister was sick, so she left me a message and said she was in a horrible mood and went to bed. I called her anyway, because I hate seeing her upset, and the first thing she said was "You really didnt have to call", but then she just talked away. Im getting the feeling its a hint she likes it, but Im not sure. The last thing I want to do is smother her. It may seem like a stupid question, but I really care about her and dont want to mess anything up. I want to be able to read as many hints that she gives off as I can. I would really appericate a females view here, but males opinions will be read and appericiated as well. I just want to know what she means by "You didnt have to". Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted October 1, 2003 Share Posted October 1, 2003 Different people use those sorts of phrases differently. It could mean anything from 'it was so nice of you to do because I wasn't expecting it' to 'I sorta wish you hadn't'. You need to know the person to get the context. Link to post Share on other sites
yes Posted October 1, 2003 Share Posted October 1, 2003 Next time she says "you didn't have to", ask "do you mean that you didn't want me to"? You'll likely be able to tell from her reply. -yes Link to post Share on other sites
RedneckRomeo Posted October 2, 2003 Share Posted October 2, 2003 the phone call - sounds like she wasn't expecting it but liked it anyway. her continuing to talk sounds like she wanted to talk to you - but was being nice by saying you didnt have to. the visits - it could be either/or.... she could be trying to say 'i dont want you to this time' or she could love having you over and just thought it was good to say - make you feel good for doing it. if its happening every time you go to her place, then it may be her wanting a bit of time without you, but its really hard to say without knowing what she's like personally, as moimeme says... it also depends on what kind of body language she;s using... if she seems weighed down when she says it, she might be wanting some time of her own, but if she's really happy and smiling, she might just be doing it for the effect - meaning she likes it, but doesn't want you to feel obligated... it could be a test. Link to post Share on other sites
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