Isolde Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 3. One was my long term bf, but I never had great passion for him. I loved him, though. I hear a lot of people describe LTR's this way. What really is the difference between passion and romantic love? I feel stupid asking such a simple question haha. Link to post Share on other sites
berrieh Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I hear a lot of people describe LTR's this way. What really is the difference between passion and romantic love? I feel stupid asking such a simple question haha. I had a very platonic love for my first boyfriend. I don't think I was really sexually attracted to him (we dated over 2 years, got engaged, but never had sex...he was very conservative in many ways; I never was in any real way), but he was my best friend, and I adored him. So, while I'd say, in a way, I loved the guy, I definitely can't count him among guys I've been in love with. That was only 1. I didn't believe I'd ever feel love until then, actually. It was when I was 22. First time I really felt true passion for a man, too... I consider passion the ignition that occurs when pure lust meets pure love. Many relationships have one or the other, but finding both seems to be rare.. Link to post Share on other sites
Isolde Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I had a very platonic love for my first boyfriend. I don't think I was really sexually attracted to him (we dated over 2 years, got engaged, but never had sex...he was very conservative in many ways; I never was in any real way), but he was my best friend, and I adored him. So, while I'd say, in a way, I loved the guy, I definitely can't count him among guys I've been in love with. That was only 1. I didn't believe I'd ever feel love until then, actually. It was when I was 22. First time I really felt true passion for a man, too... I consider passion the ignition that occurs when pure lust meets pure love. Many relationships have one or the other, but finding both seems to be rare.. I think it's just that I don't understand why people date, for a long time, people they don't find attractive... Link to post Share on other sites
berrieh Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I think it's just that I don't understand why people date, for a long time, people they don't find attractive... Oh, I found him attractive. He was adorable, gorgeous, smart as a whip, fun to be around, and looked like a Calvin Klein model. He was "better looking" than the guy I wound up being passionate about, but he didn't ignite real lust in me... At the time, I didn't know any better. I knew something was missing, but I didn't understand precisely what it was. I've found many people attractive but not wanted to have sex with them, not experienced real lust or passion for them. It's sort of the difference between, "He's so cute" and "I can't stop touching him." It's not even just purely sexual...for me, when I have passion for someone, I just want to hold, cuddle, kiss, touch, etc, them at every moment... to stay close. I didn't ache for closeness with my first few boyfriends. I liked being around them, thought they were cute, and especially my first boyfriend, who was an awesome guy, thought they were fun... But I didn't feel that zing! Link to post Share on other sites
Isolde Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Oh, I found him attractive. He was adorable, gorgeous, smart as a whip, fun to be around, and looked like a Calvin Klein model. He was "better looking" than the guy I wound up being passionate about, but he didn't ignite real lust in me... At the time, I didn't know any better. I knew something was missing, but I didn't understand precisely what it was. I've found many people attractive but not wanted to have sex with them, not experienced real lust or passion for them. It's sort of the difference between, "He's so cute" and "I can't stop touching him." It's not even just purely sexual...for me, when I have passion for someone, I just want to hold, cuddle, kiss, touch, etc, them at every moment... to stay close. I didn't ache for closeness with my first few boyfriends. I liked being around them, thought they were cute, and especially my first boyfriend, who was an awesome guy, thought they were fun... But I didn't feel that zing! Oh, ok, this makes sense. A lot of people define passion as just wanting to jump someone's bones but I think "aching for closeness" is a more accurate way of describing it. I mean, I have felt that ache before, but I haven't been in love. Gosh I am so confused right now Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 And how old are you? For me, I'd say I truly only had strong feeling for 2 people ever. I'm 25. 43 and i'd say around four Link to post Share on other sites
sumdude Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Four and 40. 2 unrequited 1 ex wife 1 friends fiancee... and no.. I'll never go there or ever let her know Link to post Share on other sites
so gutted Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I have had strong feelings for 1 person - im 32. He was an absolute b*stard, had no money and was seeing other women.....but i had feelings for him. You cant help you you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I have truly loved 3 people, age 32. All were LTRs; only one of these had the capacity to endure, but his weird family issues got in the way. We are still great friends, though, and can talk about anything. I am pretty sure we will be friends for life, and that's not something I can say about many people. Link to post Share on other sites
Jenny123 Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I've had love three times, i'm 28. Thought would have maximum twice.... Looking for number four now! oh well.... Link to post Share on other sites
Geishawhelk Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Two. My first BF and my current partner. Link to post Share on other sites
portcitykitty Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I'm 33 and I'm currently experiencing the strongest feelings I've ever had for someone. I've been involved with 2 other men. The first guy I knew had a gf at the time, so I kept my heart out of it, although with him it was just a big crush. The second guy I was never too sure about; I was with him mostly out of desperation...lol...I did love him, or at least I thought I did...I was with him for about 4 years, though, but I was never in love with him. But the guy I'm with now, WHEW!!! Yeah, I'm definitely feeling things I've NEVER EVER felt before with either of the other 2, and to be quite honest, it's kinda hard to cope with...lol! I'm both in love with him and I love him MADLY!!! With him, I finally feel true passion, that a couple other posters on here have mentioned. I never felt passion with the other 2. I long to be with this guy...I dream about him, yearn for him, everything! And I can finally understand what those dramatic, passionate scenes in the movies and on tv and in songs are portraying...I finally feel it...never thought I would!!! Link to post Share on other sites
shylight200 Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 I'm 33 and I'm currently experiencing the strongest feelings I've ever had for someone. I've been involved with 2 other men. The first guy I knew had a gf at the time, so I kept my heart out of it, although with him it was just a big crush. The second guy I was never too sure about; I was with him mostly out of desperation...lol...I did love him, or at least I thought I did...I was with him for about 4 years, though, but I was never in love with him. But the guy I'm with now, WHEW!!! Yeah, I'm definitely feeling things I've NEVER EVER felt before with either of the other 2, and to be quite honest, it's kinda hard to cope with...lol! I'm both in love with him and I love him MADLY!!! With him, I finally feel true passion, that a couple other posters on here have mentioned. I never felt passion with the other 2. I long to be with this guy...I dream about him, yearn for him, everything! And I can finally understand what those dramatic, passionate scenes in the movies and on tv and in songs are portraying...I finally feel it...never thought I would!!! aww, that's so great. I've been in love with someone before, but nowhere near the way you feel about your guy. Link to post Share on other sites
portcitykitty Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 aww, that's so great. I've been in love with someone before, but nowhere near the way you feel about your guy. Aaw, thanks! It is a truly awesome feeling, and I've always heard other people experiencing it, and it would get me down because I thought I would NEVER EVER feel it with anybody, until this dude came along! I know they refer to being in love as being on Cloud 9, right? Well, I'm on a higher cloud than that...we'll say Cloud 69!! I promise I'm not exaggerating! THEY ARE VERY INTENSE FEELINGS!!! It's hard to focus on work and everyday tasks (watch out if you see me on the road...lol), and it's hard to get to sleep at night, cuz this guy is on my mind 24/7/365. But I'm trying to enjoy the goodness cuz knowing my luck, I'll never know if (or when) I'll ever experience these feelings again! Hang in there, girlfriend, I'm sure you'll find a guy that'll sweep you off your feet the way this guy did to me! I wish you the best! Link to post Share on other sites
Vertex Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 I'm 22, and I think I've only had strong feelings for one person, to be entirely honest. I was with her for a bit under 2 years. It didn't work out in the end, and in fact ended on quite an ugly note, but I don't regret the relationship for a second. It taught me so much, and I have many great memories from the experience. I am now a single college student, but I am trying to be hopeful for the future. I'm still young, and there are plenty of people out there for me (at least, I hope there are, haha!). Link to post Share on other sites
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