Lumpy Posted September 7, 2008 Posted September 7, 2008 Ok, if any of you remember my post from a few weeks back, I am still referring to the same girl. I asked her to be my gf and she said yes. But, she has been closing herself off from me. We still hang out regularly but she won't let me in to her heart. We were talking about it last night and she said she's not letting me in because she is afraid of getting hurt. The only people she lets into her life are her close friends and family. SHe said she has been hurt in relationships in the past and doesn't want that to happen again. I told her that comes with the territory of dating, if she's afraid of getting hurt, why does she date? I REALLY like this girl and want something to come out of this. But, at the same time I feel I should save myself the heartache and let go. I just don't know what to do, so I'm turning to you guys/ladies.
Author Lumpy Posted September 7, 2008 Author Posted September 7, 2008 Also, here is the original post. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?p=1795425#post1795425
cheezy100 Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 If you truly like her, then you would continue to get her heart. If not, then you don't really like her that much. It takes time to be accepted into someones heart. this is just my personal view though.
Author Lumpy Posted September 8, 2008 Author Posted September 8, 2008 If you truly like her, then you would continue to get her heart. If not, then you don't really like her that much. It takes time to be accepted into someones heart. this is just my personal view though. Trust me, I want to continue, I would love to see something come of this. This girl is so freaking awesome. I'm willing to put in the time to get her to open up. I'm afraid of getting hurt, but that comes with the territory, and I am willing to take that risk. My last relationship went very quickly, we were using the L word within a couple of weeks, that led to marriage, a child, and now, 5 years later, a divorce. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am basing this relationship off my last from a time point of view, when I probably shouldn't. I've been out of the game for 5 years and this is all brand new to me for the second time.
cheezy100 Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 Trust me, I want to continue, I would love to see something come of this. This girl is so freaking awesome. I'm willing to put in the time to get her to open up. I'm afraid of getting hurt, but that comes with the territory, and I am willing to take that risk. My last relationship went very quickly, we were using the L word within a couple of weeks, that led to marriage, a child, and now, 5 years later, a divorce. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am basing this relationship off my last from a time point of view, when I probably shouldn't. I've been out of the game for 5 years and this is all brand new to me for the second time. Although I have my doubts about the guy I'm dating, I've learned something from his online advice to other men from another discussion forum (but he doesn't know I know). That is....build confidence and don't be afraid of rejection. The more you go out there, even if she doesn't open up her heart, at least you made an effort. The more rejections you get, the more experience it will be. Sooner or later, rejections would be nothing to you because of 20 women you approach, maybe 2 will accept your heart. Do you know what I'm saying? The guy I'm dating is a pro at women, which makes me feel like i'm dating a player, but I'm learning a lot from him. I just play it safe, so that I won't get BURNED also. But I'm still continuing so that I can understand his heart and whether if I should accept it to the point that I would "love" him. Honestly, I've never been in love before. And I've never liked someone before either. This is my first time that I think I felt something that I can't explain. It's hard to make this decision. To break it or continue. I'm still contemplating myself. But I think I'm gonna continue, even if I know I will get BURNED. Doesn't matter if it's been 5 years, just go out there and be yourself...build some confidence. If she doesn't like you, then it's her loss. There are many women out there. Many different types too.
Author Lumpy Posted September 8, 2008 Author Posted September 8, 2008 Well, I think I screwed the pooch. She won't return my calls or texts. Should I just give her a couple days to cool down/think about what we talked about? Or, just write her off?
stillafool Posted September 8, 2008 Posted September 8, 2008 Ok, if any of you remember my post from a few weeks back, I am still referring to the same girl. I asked her to be my gf and she said yes. But, she has been closing herself off from me. We still hang out regularly but she won't let me in to her heart. We were talking about it last night and she said she's not letting me in because she is afraid of getting hurt. The only people she lets into her life are her close friends and family. SHe said she has been hurt in relationships in the past and doesn't want that to happen again. I told her that comes with the territory of dating, if she's afraid of getting hurt, why does she date? I REALLY like this girl and want something to come out of this. But, at the same time I feel I should save myself the heartache and let go. I just don't know what to do, so I'm turning to you guys/ladies. What exactly do you mean she won't let you into her heart. What is it you want from her she has said she is your gf. I'm curious because someone told me this once.
Author Lumpy Posted September 8, 2008 Author Posted September 8, 2008 She won't let me get close to her on a personal level. She doesn't want to get closer than what we are because she is afraid of getting hurt. You know what though, I'm afraid of getting hurt, also. That is a risk I am willing to take that she does not want to take with me.
Author Lumpy Posted September 9, 2008 Author Posted September 9, 2008 Well that was fast, we talked tonight and it's over. SHe says we are looking for different things. Oh well, there's more fish in the sea.
stillafool Posted September 9, 2008 Posted September 9, 2008 Well that was fast, we talked tonight and it's over. SHe says we are looking for different things. Oh well, there's more fish in the sea. WTF! What happened so fast?
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