Was I Co*k Blocked?

[D-Lish]

I have a friend that chronically steps in when a guy is trying to chat me up- she even gets mad at me if we go out and I get more attention than her.... and she is in a long term relationship.

 

This girl doesn't really sound like that. Maybe she joined the convo because she didn't want to stand by herself? Hard to say. Was she overly flirtatious with him?

[D-Lish]

And I guess when a girl does it to another girl it's called getting "box-blocked"

[Jilly Bean]

So you have issues with her even "intruding", right out the gate!

 

I suppose so! lol. It's just not my style. I am super social, but I never try to muscle in on a friends action. That's just how I roll, and how all of my close gf's are, too.

 

Well, but if you said she was a hair dresser, you know how they are.

 

They make friends with everybody and are very social.

 

She probably thought that you were trying to make "new friends" and being social who knows.

 

I know from what I've read here that you are a very sexual person, and when you hit on some guy you mean business.

 

But many girls are not like that.

 

Maybe she thought you just went to the bathroom and would be right back or something and she was trying to be polite to the guy.

 

Perhaps, A. I'll give you (her) that much. You are right - I don't give guys the time of day unless there is some serious interest.

 

 

From what you've posted (based on what little you remember thanks to the silver! ), she sounds more socially inept than a c*ck blocker. Perhaps that's why you weren't interested in being friends with her to begin with?

 

 

 

I would have tried to catch his eye when she wasn't looking and done a little nod towards her with a facial expression to denote that I wasn't happy she intruded, and see his response. If he didn't pick up what I was putting down, I would have walked.

 

She's not cuter than you, is she JB?

 

God love the silver patron. lol. You could be right, SG. She told me earlier in the evening that she was tweaked at a friend who is temporarily living with her, and spends all her time with her guy, and never goes out with her. Perhaps she is the type who just totally gloms onto someone in a social setting.

 

Truly, my Mom had been trying to set us up as friends for four years. I wanted NO part of it. She recently started doing my hair, and pursued a friendship, so I felt somewhat obligated. I enjoy her company, but I also didn't appreciate the block.

 

Is she cuter? Nope. My gf I was out with on FRI night is BEAUTIFUL. Truly stunning, and I love that about her. She rocks it. This girl - ut uh. Cute face, big butt, little pooch. But definitely not cuter.

 

I guess it's pointless to ask why on earth you would be approaching guys like that in the first place. It seems overly aggressive and, besides, you had a friend with you that you desserted. But maybe that's just me. I've never had a friend do that to me. Why do you even bring anyone with you if you're just going to go up and down the bar hitting on guys? BTW, this guy probably wasn't into either of you since he didn't make the effort to approach in the first place.

 

I'm guessing that your friend felt left out and thought it would be ok to join the conversation. And then I think she was horrified that you put her in the position to be taken home by a perfect stranger. That would've pissed me off immensely. I think things that you might think of as 'chick code' isn't clear to her, or to a lot of women for that matter. I would just talk to her about it because based on the silence between the two of you on the way home, I doubt she plans to go out with you again.

 

LOL! "approaching guys like that"? Not sure what you mean. He was sitting at the bar, and I siddled in so I could order drinks for her and I. I was hardly throwing myself at him. lol. And I was hardly going up and down the bar hitting on guys! He was the first, and only one I spoke to. Too funny.

 

And I honestly have no plans to go out with her again, so it's all good.

 

Seriously, a discussion and ground rules laid out, might be a good idea for the next time the two of you go out together.

 

Yeah, don't think I'll be repeating that again, Trial. I felt all along like my Mom was making me play with her. I honestly NEVER have friendship drama. If I do, they are out and done. I don't have the need nor patience for it. Lord knows I get enough of it in my man life...

 

For future reference:

 

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cunt+shunt

 

WORD! lmao. Leave it to Nemo to say it all so succinctly...

 

I have a friend that chronically steps in when a guy is trying to chat me up- she even gets mad at me if we go out and I get more attention than her.... and she is in a long term relationship.

 

This girl doesn't really sound like that. Maybe she joined the convo because she didn't want to stand by herself? Hard to say. Was she overly flirtatious with him?

 

Yes, yes, yes! This girl is particularly desperate. She told me she changed her match profile to say KIDNAP ME! She just *really* wants to find a guy, and knowing that about her, on top of her story of being pissed at her other friend for spending all her time with her guy and never with her, made me think she's going to be that c*ck blocking, jealous, "why are you interested in HIM?" kind of girl we have all met.

 

She wasn't overly flirtatious, but she also lacks that skill set to begin with.

 

I still feel that if she wasn't trying to work him, then why stay and chat with him that long? If I am stuck with a dude I'm not interested in, I have NO problem taking off. OR, when I first left and said I would be back, she could have left with me to stroll. OR, she could have excused herself to say she was going to look for me.

 

It was an odd dynamic that, at the time, I read as her getting into competitive mode for his attention. I refuse to play that, so I removed myself entirely. I thought she would have left him, and when she didn't, I assumed she was trying to work him, and that's why I was ready to leave.

[D-Lish]

It was an odd dynamic that, at the time, I read as her getting into competitive mode for his attention. I refuse to play that, so I removed myself entirely. I thought she would have left him, and when she didn't, I assumed she was trying to work him, and that's why I was ready to leave.

 

Yeah, I refuse to play that game as well. As I mentioned, my gf chronically muscles in on guys that try to talk to me- and I just back off. I couldn't imagine competing for a guys attention.

 

SO are you going to hang out with this girl again?

[Jilly Bean]

Yeah, I refuse to play that game as well. As I mentioned, my gf chronically muscles in on guys that try to talk to me- and I just back off. I couldn't imagine competing for a guys attention.

 

SO are you going to hang out with this girl again?

 

Yes, that's EXACTLY what I did. I thought it was obvious I was digging him. When she encroached, I was just done. I won't compete for a guy, and I felt like that's what she was doing. Maybe I was wrong in reading it like that, but then I keep wondering WHY she would have stayed with him all that time if, as she said, there was no attraction, and she had no interest in him.

 

If I am in a bar with a friend, and a guy comes up to talk to both of us initially, then I see a vibe between my friend and the guy - I SPLIT. I like to give them their space to get their groove on. I would have expected the same in return...

 

I seriously doubt we will hang again, D. Not to mention I now have to find a new hairdresser - lol.

[Ariadne]

Maybe I was wrong in reading it like that, but then I keep wondering WHY she would have stayed with him all that time if, as she said, there was no attraction, and she had no interest in him.

 

Well, maybe she felt flattered to be talking to the cutest guy there as you said. Maybe there was a little bit of ego boost, especially if she had a drink or two.

 

I'd still go out with her, I mean, women wings are not that easy to find.

[Green]

ur gf felt left out or what ever. Your a girl you can't get Co*k blocked, technicaly she did block that guys Co*k if thats where things were posibly heading.

[Jilly Bean]

Well, maybe she felt flattered to be talking to the cutest guy there as you said. Maybe there was a little bit of ego boost, especially if she had a drink or two.

 

I'd still go out with her, I mean, women wings are not that easy to find.

 

Perhaps...

 

Women wings are good to keep, but only if they are the type to have your back, and not try to stab it.

[Jilly Bean]

ur gf felt left out or what ever. Your a girl you can't get Co*k blocked, technicaly she did block that guys Co*k if thats where things were posibly heading.

 

Well, I was c*ck blocked, as she blocked his...

 

Scroll back a page - Nemo pointed out the exact terminology for a chick who does this...

[Ariadne]

Perhaps...

 

Women wings are good to keep, but only if they are the type to have your back, and not try to stab it.

 

Oh, come on.

 

You only went out with her once or twice. She is a rookie.

 

Let her learn from the pro.

 

Besides, who wants to change hair dressers.

 

(At least you know she's desperate for men, that's good)

[Jilly Bean]

Oh, come on.

 

You only went out with her once or twice. She is a rookie.

 

Let her learn from the pro.

 

Besides, who wants to change hair dressers.

 

(At least you know she's desperate for men, that's good)

 

You're too funny! Well, I don't feel like taking on any pet projects these days...

 

She wasn't a GREAT hairdresser, just OK. I only saw her twice for hair, so no biggie to change (again). sigh.

 

And the desperate thing isn't that great. Makes women behave badly.

[johan]

You have your semi-gay lover anyway, right?

[Ariadne]

And the desperate thing isn't that great. Makes women behave badly.

 

Yeah, but they are "always" ready to go out, even on short notice.

 

I prefer my wing women to be less attractive than I am. It makes it easier.

[Jilly Bean]

Yeah, but they are "always" ready to go out, even on short notice.

 

I prefer my wing women to be less attractive than I am. It makes it easier.

 

LOL. True, they have nothing else to do...

 

I like my wing women to be the same level of attractiveness. When they are less, it can create some type of jealousy and competition (like last night). Most of my gf's are on the same par as me, and when my gf's are less attractive, I have always noticed more "issues" when it comes to meeting guys.

[Jilly Bean]

So, I just got a text from this gal.

 

"sorry things got so wacky last night - hope there isn't any hard feelings."

 

And this means... ?

[Ariadne]

So, I just got a text from this gal.

 

"sorry things got so wacky last night - hope there isn't any hard feelings."

 

And this means... ?

 

It means she doesn't know what she did wrong and she likes you.

 

Just call her and apologize for whatever and explain to her.

 

She seems like a nice person and she doesn't know.

[GPFan]

I still feel that if she wasn't trying to work him, then why stay and chat with him that long? If I am stuck with a dude I'm not interested in, I have NO problem taking off. OR, when I first left and said I would be back, she could have left with me to stroll. OR, she could have excused herself to say she was going to look for me.

I still maintain that she doesn't understand the "chick code" you operate under. She probably remained with him because she assumed you were returning and didn't want to be rude to him by just walking away.

 

I don't believe every group of women operates under the same chick code you and your close girlfriends do.

 

No harm done, the two of you simply have differing styles/goals of interacting when you go out. It just so happens you don't like hers.

 

 

 

 

 

So, I just got a text from this gal.

 

"sorry things got so wacky last night - hope there isn't any hard feelings."

 

And this means... ?

She sensed your resentment and is trying to smooth things over. Why don't you use this opportunity to explain this "chick code" to her?

[Jilly Bean]

Yes, I suppose you're both right. Can I do it tomorrow? I got a nasty ass text from Baller about 3AM that has still left me in a major funk and serious eff u attitude. OK to table it until I am (slightly) more sane?

[Event Horizon]

Agree with KMT...you were not c*ck blocked....you were tw*t blocked.

 

Only guys can c*ck block one another.

 

E..H

[whichwayisup]

It was unintentional. She is a 'new' friend and more than likely wasn't paying attention to you and that guy...Though, I must say you ran off pretty quickly. Instead of writing your number on a piece of paper, handing to the guy and tell him, 'call me', you chose to hand him over to her. He probably was like WTF, I don't wanna talk to the new girl who just joined us - Yet you walked away so he took that as a hint you weren't interested in him.

[Jilly Bean]

It was unintentional. She is a 'new' friend and more than likely wasn't paying attention to you and that guy...Though, I must say you ran off pretty quickly. Instead of writing your number on a piece of paper, handing to the guy and tell him, 'call me', you chose to hand him over to her. He probably was like WTF, I don't wanna talk to the new girl who just joined us - Yet you walked away so he took that as a hint you weren't interested in him.

 

Oh, I totally agree, WWIU - I know I sent him the message that I wasn't interested when I took off. I just REFUSE to ever compete for a guys affections with ANYONE, let alone a friend, so I wasn't going to drop my number, or hang around to see the claws come out. And she was definitely paying attention to him at that moment...

 

I think when I asked her in the parking lot to go back in and I'd buy her a drink and she said no, could be because he already hosed her - lol.

[whichwayisup]

You left though. I honestly don't think she was competing with you J. She was paying attention to him because it went from a one on one conversation with just you and him, to a 3 way conversation, when she joined up with you. He included her not to make her feel left out.

 

Anyway, I think you should look for him again..Keep an eye out.

 

PS Yes you can laugh at me, but what does this mean?

could be because he already hosed her - lol.

 

Do you mean that he already bought her a drink? Sorry, I'm tired tonight..

[Jilly Bean]

You left though. I honestly don't think she was competing with you J. She was paying attention to him because it went from a one on one conversation with just you and him, to a 3 way conversation, when she joined up with you. He included her not to make her feel left out.

 

Anyway, I think you should look for him again..Keep an eye out.

 

PS Yes you can laugh at me, but what does this mean?

 

Do you mean that he already bought her a drink? Sorry, I'm tired tonight..

 

You could be right, hon.

 

I actually saw him at a bar in my little town that I have NEVER been to before. Not exactly the kind of bar I would walk into again. Alone. But, we'll see what fate brings.

 

By hosing her, I meant that he blew her off. Perhaps that's why she didn't want to go back in when I asked her to, and offered to buy her a drink. Because he already had blown her off.

[D-Lish]

I think that the fact that she reached out with a text is indicative of he just being a bit naive about the process of how you operate. WHen I go out with my gf- if it's justthe two of us we have this pre-arranged deal that we stay by each other sides so we don'g get lost of we can us the other as an excuse to leave if we dont like the dude.

 

I think that's what it's all about- just easing into how each other operates. Perhaps she just doesn't want to be alone and if she's there with you, she wants to be in the vicinity of where you are so you guys can keep an eye on one another. If you go out with a group of girls- then at least, the others can step back and let you do your thing without feeling left out.

 

If you are more attractive than she is, she probably just assumed he was into you and was only making nice with him out of interest for you? It's hard to say. I have friends that would have no problem moving in on men their friends were chatting up or interested in.

[Jilly Bean]

I think that the fact that she reached out with a text is indicative of he just being a bit naive about the process of how you operate. WHen I go out with my gf- if it's justthe two of us we have this pre-arranged deal that we stay by each other sides so we don'g get lost of we can us the other as an excuse to leave if we dont like the dude.

 

I think that's what it's all about- just easing into how each other operates. Perhaps she just doesn't want to be alone and if she's there with you, she wants to be in the vicinity of where you are so you guys can keep an eye on one another. If you go out with a group of girls- then at least, the others can step back and let you do your thing without feeling left out.

 

If you are more attractive than she is, she probably just assumed he was into you and was only making nice with him out of interest for you? It's hard to say. I have friends that would have no problem moving in on men their friends were chatting up or interested in.

 

Yeah, I don't really know, D. Was only our 2nd date - lol.

 

The bar wasn't very crowded at all, nor was it well lit. But you're right - she could have been hanging close for fear of being alone. I forget that since I have traveled the globe solo, I have no problem being anywhere and alone. Maybe she wasn't like that (read NEEDY). lol