Chinook Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 I've been doing some reflective introspection. 26th June it was a year ago since my ex partner dumped me. I wrote this about it at the time. You know what's funny, I knew how it would all pan out - how painful healing would be and how long it would take. I knew it, I'd done it previously. Here I am a year later, feeling much better and remembering not just the sadness or what a horrible person he was, but remembering why I loved him too. Remembering not what it was about him which made that relationship special, but what it was about me, what I gave... how I can invest myself emotionally and trust someone again. Knowing that I have what it takes to do it again. I I'm not saying I'm ready because I'm not. Not yet. I recently walked away from a housemate/friends-first-but-could-have-been-potential-to-be-lovers situation because I didn't feel ready and I saved myself a lot of heartache and pain (as well as the other person too). But what I'm saying here to you guys in the coping section is that dealing with that pain, walking around with it, learning to deal with it appropriately, it takes time... only time. One day it's painful, how so very painful it is. I know. But sooner or later, it's not so painful anymore. Sooner or later, after a thousand hours of tears and a million thoughts running through your head about how and why... eventually, you heal and it isn't so painful anymore. So tell yourself, this is a temporary feeling. One day you'll be where you need to be and things will work out exactly like they are supposed to and you will learn more from it, you will improve yourself and become a person who can survive. You will learn how to love again and you will give again. For me, knowing that possibility, breathing life into my emotional well-being is the best part of my healing process, knowing that I can do this again when I never thought I could, that's progress that I welcome. I'm not posting this to gloat or be bragging where I am now. Those of you who know my posting style and advice, know I wouldn't do that. I'm posting it so that you understand, those of you in pain, that it will get better. Have faith in yourself and who you are. Be kind to yourself but most of all - be patient with yourself... let yourself heal.
foxh1234 Posted July 5, 2008 Posted July 5, 2008 I've been doing some reflective introspection. 26th June it was a year ago since my ex partner dumped me. I wrote this about it at the time. You know what's funny, I knew how it would all pan out - how painful healing would be and how long it would take. I knew it, I'd done it previously. Here I am a year later, feeling much better and remembering not just the sadness or what a horrible person he was, but remembering why I loved him too. Remembering not what it was about him which made that relationship special, but what it was about me, what I gave... how I can invest myself emotionally and trust someone again. Knowing that I have what it takes to do it again. I I'm not saying I'm ready because I'm not. Not yet. I recently walked away from a housemate/friends-first-but-could-have-been-potential-to-be-lovers situation because I didn't feel ready and I saved myself a lot of heartache and pain (as well as the other person too). But what I'm saying here to you guys in the coping section is that dealing with that pain, walking around with it, learning to deal with it appropriately, it takes time... only time. One day it's painful, how so very painful it is. I know. But sooner or later, it's not so painful anymore. Sooner or later, after a thousand hours of tears and a million thoughts running through your head about how and why... eventually, you heal and it isn't so painful anymore. So tell yourself, this is a temporary feeling. One day you'll be where you need to be and things will work out exactly like they are supposed to and you will learn more from it, you will improve yourself and become a person who can survive. You will learn how to love again and you will give again. For me, knowing that possibility, breathing life into my emotional well-being is the best part of my healing process, knowing that I can do this again when I never thought I could, that's progress that I welcome. I'm not posting this to gloat or be bragging where I am now. Those of you who know my posting style and advice, know I wouldn't do that. I'm posting it so that you understand, those of you in pain, that it will get better. Have faith in yourself and who you are. Be kind to yourself but most of all - be patient with yourself... let yourself heal. Good for you C, I am happy you are doing well. I hope to be there soon as well. This has been the most painful thing I have been through in my life and I have learned alot about myself in the process. I will not make the same mistakes in the future.
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