will he leave her

[me003]

 

Ever heard that saying about the devil you know is better than the one you don't? My guess? He will stick with what he knows, and can rely on as a sure thing regardless of how "unhappy" he is.

 

I totally agree. I had a somewhat similar situation and he wants to stay in the R because he has known her a long time and he can't seem to see his life without her. Not to say that he is happy but he can't give up the benefits of the extended family. Also he doesn't want to loose his house or pay for child support.

Sad for both but what can you do.. you can give advice but until you have had enough of a horrible/toxic relationship no on will listen.

[GreenEyedLady]

That is a good point. MM knows he is a cheater, but he also knows that the OW is in a relationship with a MM. So, when it comes down to it, "who can HE trust?"

 

Maybe this is why some of the MM that do leave the marriage don't move in with the OW. They ask for "time" to sort things out. They may continue to see the OW, but in reality the MM knows that the OW isn't really that trustworthy. When it comes to a real relationship, as hypocritical as it sounds, the man wants a woman he can trust even if he himself isn't so trustworthy.

 

A very interesting concept indeed.

 

I find this thought-provoking.

 

I have always thought it was interesting (for lack of a better word) that the MM and OW didn't move in together and instead gave each other space. In my R we didn't do that at all. To do so would be like still perpetuating the lie, kinda. Look we just met, *wink, wink,* after the couple just separated.

 

Not saying either way is "better" per se, but if you can't be together right away, isn't that like saying you're better off apart?

 

Does it have to do with trustworthiness? I'm not sure. Maybe it has to do with courage and not caring what other people think. And maybe, just maybe, it has to do with coming clean and realizing who you really are.