Weird request from married friend

[OWoman]

Really, I thought someone was following me one day, turns out it was my a*s*s:p

 

lulz Bent you are too :lmao: for words!

[White Flower]

Wow. I was one of those who looked no different (besides the Pammy Anderson bits) until I woke up one morning at about 7 months and found an elephant in my bed. Which turned out to be me...

We had a word for women like you:p

[flexo]

I just got home and was not expecting to see all of these replies and great advice (i thought i would get laughed off!). I just want to say a big thank you to everyone who took the time to reply and share some thoughts. It's weird how as many times as i have gone through the scenario in my head I haven't thought of many of the things mentioned here.

 

 

I think i should address a few points here. First of all the filming thing was the first thing that really raised some alarms for me at the start. If it was me and my partner filming then maybe i would go through with it (not that i would probably even do that because of the ease at which things can get spread). Since they would also have a copy of it then i would not be so comfortable with it. I actually discussed this with Anna and she said that it wasn't a deal breaker and that they could go either way on this issue. For them the fantasy itself is the key part. At the same time i think she would probably be more worried about it getting out then me.

 

As for our friendship and what may end up afterwards - i've been in two 'friends with benefits' situations with close friends in the past and one lasted quite a long time. After they ended, one friendship pretty much ended, where as i'm as close as ever with the other girl that i had relations with.

 

To be honest Anna and I aren't as close as we used to be, and in fact after the child is born i see our friendship becoming distant again naturally, like how it did after she got married. I'm not trying to justify going through with this plan but i think our friendship would not change too much. In the past when we were close, we used to discuss our sex lives quite often, and usually in great detail.

 

For me the deal breaker is her husband - i just don't think i would be too comfortable seeing a guy playing with himself out of the corner of my eye. I also don't know how the whole thing would work - after he's done, or after we're done then what? everyone just puts their close back on and it's "see you next week"?. I have been in a threesome with two girls once during university days and i wasn't even too comfortable then.

 

I feel so torn about this. Some days i feel like 'no way am i going through with this' and other days i want the chance at being intimate with her. If it was any other woman involved i would have said no right away, but you have to understand that Anna has been the object of my fantasies for so long. I don't have a pregnant fetish or anything like that, but seeing her pregnant does not make me any less attracted to her.

 

There is a part of me that would be willing to take any risk to get that opportunity. It's not that i'm sex starved or anything because since i finished university 2 years ago, i've been lucky enough to be in a few relationships where the sex was great. Last night i was feeling a little doubtful, and today i was more like 'i think i'll do it'. Right now I'm back in the middle. We're supposed to get together on sunday morning to talk about it in person so if anything happens i'll give some updates if anyone is interested. I'm glad that i got to talk to some people about this weird situation i'm in.

[whichwayisup]

Take more time to think about this, don't let her push you into making a choice on the spot. IF you are feeling uneasy about it and something doesn't feel right, DO NOT DO IT. I hope she respects your choice if you do decide it's a no-go, and doesn't keep asking you.

 

I feel so torn about this. Some days i feel like 'no way am i going through with this' and other days i want the chance at being intimate with her. If it was any other woman involved i would have said no right away, but you have to understand that Anna has been the object of my fantasies for so long.

 

I think your feelings for her go deeper than you realize. Re-read your first post and tell me (try to take a step back and pretend it's someone else posting and you are someone who is just reading with an open mind) what you think.

 

What if you want it to happen again, get too attached? Can't control the feelings? It can happen, so never say never. She is different than the other FWB's because you two shared a connection and from what I've read so far, I think if not careful, you could easily fall for her and get hurt.

[flexo]

I think you're right and that I will take some more time to think about it. Also, I don't want to give the impression that I'm being forced into it by her. If i were to say no i don't think she would be upset because the proposition was a bit out there to start with.

 

Just as an aside, i had a good laugh reading the preggo banter above. She is showing quite a bit for 5 months and one of our other friends was surprised how big she has become this quickly. I guess since she hasn't put much weight on elsewhere, it makes her belly and breasts look bigger than they really are in terms of proportions.

[Nemo]

Dude, if you don't take this golden opportunity, then you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Remember to ask for a souvenir copy.

 

And watch your back during the act.

[White Flower]

Dude, if you don't take this golden opportunity, then you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Remember to ask for a souvenir copy.

 

And watch your back during the act.

Why don't you two exchange phone numbers so he can pass it along to Anna?

[Nemo]

Why don't you two exchange phone numbers so he can pass it along to Anna?

I prefer not to go back over old ground, when there is virgin territory to explore. Having said that, some of my maps may need updating.

[pelicanpreacher]

I just got home and was not expecting to see all of these replies and great advice (i thought i would get laughed off!). I just want to say a big thank you to everyone who took the time to reply and share some thoughts. It's weird how as many times as i have gone through the scenario in my head I haven't thought of many of the things mentioned here.

 

 

I think i should address a few points here. First of all the filming thing was the first thing that really raised some alarms for me at the start. If it was me and my partner filming then maybe i would go through with it (not that i would probably even do that because of the ease at which things can get spread). Since they would also have a copy of it then i would not be so comfortable with it. I actually discussed this with Anna and she said that it wasn't a deal breaker and that they could go either way on this issue. For them the fantasy itself is the key part. At the same time i think she would probably be more worried about it getting out then me.

 

As for our friendship and what may end up afterwards - i've been in two 'friends with benefits' situations with close friends in the past and one lasted quite a long time. After they ended, one friendship pretty much ended, where as i'm as close as ever with the other girl that i had relations with.

 

To be honest Anna and I aren't as close as we used to be, and in fact after the child is born i see our friendship becoming distant again naturally, like how it did after she got married. I'm not trying to justify going through with this plan but i think our friendship would not change too much. In the past when we were close, we used to discuss our sex lives quite often, and usually in great detail.

 

For me the deal breaker is her husband - i just don't think i would be too comfortable seeing a guy playing with himself out of the corner of my eye. I also don't know how the whole thing would work - after he's done, or after we're done then what? everyone just puts their close back on and it's "see you next week"?. I have been in a threesome with two girls once during university days and i wasn't even too comfortable then.

 

I feel so torn about this. Some days i feel like 'no way am i going through with this' and other days i want the chance at being intimate with her. If it was any other woman involved i would have said no right away, but you have to understand that Anna has been the object of my fantasies for so long. I don't have a pregnant fetish or anything like that, but seeing her pregnant does not make me any less attracted to her.

 

There is a part of me that would be willing to take any risk to get that opportunity. It's not that i'm sex starved or anything because since i finished university 2 years ago, i've been lucky enough to be in a few relationships where the sex was great. Last night i was feeling a little doubtful, and today i was more like 'i think i'll do it'. Right now I'm back in the middle. We're supposed to get together on sunday morning to talk about it in person so if anything happens i'll give some updates if anyone is interested. I'm glad that i got to talk to some people about this weird situation i'm in.

 

Not so fast my friend. Anna is in the driver's seat and, even if this is a fantasy licensed and propelled by her husband, SHE CHOSE YOU out of all the other men she's known in her life as the one to engage with! Don't believe for one moment that its just because you meet her/their paramaters of safety and anonymity that granted you a spot on the short list. Think on your history with this woman. Women don't often disclose their sex lives and general fantasies with a longtime male friend unless they've experienced a deepening emotional connection compounded with moments of sexual curiosity about that man in particular. Most women are funny in that they have to really feel something for you to have sex with you. Like most guys, you may have been a bit dense towards her intrigue so the hidden meaning in her past overtures blew right past you.

 

I'd also have reservations about getting naked and engaging in sex in front of another guy. I might even experience performance anxiety under the circumstances!

 

The bonfire's lit for a roll in some hot hay!

If you start feeling a little too warm just ignore the flames and sing along with Billy Joel's...

My Life..."Either way its okay you'll wake up with yourself"!...

 

Good luck on your adventure though. LOL!

[pelicanpreacher]

Really, I thought someone was following me one day, turns out it was my a*s*s:p

 

You just made me spew a good swallow of beer!

[OWoman]

Women don't often disclose their sex lives and general fantasies with a longtime male friend unless they've experienced a deepening emotional connection compounded with moments of sexual curiosity about that man in particular. Most women are funny in that they have to really feel something for you to have sex with you.

 

Peli I'm glad you said "most women" - and not ALL women! Elsewise I'd have had to peek into my undies again to check. For the record, myself - and many of my female friends (ie, I don't consider myself a freak in this regard) do discuss sexual matters with male friends - in my case, it's exclusively with male friends about whom I harbour NO sexual curiosity at all, however deep or intimate the friendship. I would certainly not discuss my sex life with a guy I wanted to hit on - unless it was The Talk - but I would more readily discuss my sex life with male friends than with female friends, I guess the same way that I'd rather walk naked through a roomful of men than suffer the women's change rooms at the gym!

 

And no, I certainly don't have to "really feel something" for a guy in order to have sex with him - nor in order to have great sex with him. Some of my hottest sexual experiences have been with guys I regarded - and used - as sex toys. There are lots of women like this - not every girl wants to marry every guy she sleeps with.

[pelicanpreacher]

Peli I'm glad you said "most women" - and not ALL women! Elsewise I'd have had to peek into my undies again to check. For the record, myself - and many of my female friends (ie, I don't consider myself a freak in this regard) do discuss sexual matters with male friends - in my case, it's exclusively with male friends about whom I harbour NO sexual curiosity at all, however deep or intimate the friendship. I would certainly not discuss my sex life with a guy I wanted to hit on - unless it was The Talk - but I would more readily discuss my sex life with male friends than with female friends, I guess the same way that I'd rather walk naked through a roomful of men than suffer the women's change rooms at the gym!

 

And no, I certainly don't have to "really feel something" for a guy in order to have sex with him - nor in order to have great sex with him. Some of my hottest sexual experiences have been with guys I regarded - and used - as sex toys. There are lots of women like this - not every girl wants to marry every guy she sleeps with.

 

I have gotta move out of the Midwest!

[OWoman]

I have gotta move out of the Midwest!

 

I reckon!

[pelicanpreacher]

After rereading your post I'm more depressed than ever. There is no worse spot for a lonely guy to be in than the dustbin of "Only just a friend" to a gorgeous woman. Couple that with another poster's stance that if you are over 30 and single there must be something very wrong with you only deepens my frustration. Well, I guess the only thing a guy like me has to look forward to is plodding this life out alone tilll I hit the end of the road.

[OWoman]

After rereading your post I'm more depressed than ever. There is no worse spot for a lonely guy to be in than the dustbin of "Only just a friend" to a gorgeous woman. Couple that with another poster's stance that if you are over 30 and single there must be something very wrong with you only deepens my frustration. Well, I guess the only thing a guy like me has to look forward to is plodding this life out alone tilll I hit the end of the road.

 

I wouldn't put it as low as 30! Maybe... 35?

[flexo]

I have to agree with OWoman on the whole matter of women discussing sexual matters with male friends. Though it seems uncommon, i've had another friend whom i've had no relations with discuss intricate details of her sex life with me.

 

The deal with Anna is that she seems to have two faces to her regarding her attitude towards her own sexual side. On one side, during the days when she was still single/dating, she would always make dirty, or sex related jokes with her male friends. She had just as many, if nor more, male friends (most of which who are same age or older) than female. Usually on nights out with the circle of friends, she would always joke about how good she was in bed, or boast how she gave the best BJs in town - even jokingly demonstrating her 'technique' on a bottle once. Other times she would be in some guys lap, or making sure that the guys noticed her breasts or that her thong was sticking out of the back of her jeans. She'd even let guys pull on it now and then. So in that joking regard, she wasn't too shy about things like that. Although she didn't sleep around with them, she insisted that she got off on purely the sexual attention she got.

 

On the other side, she always seemed to shield me from that wild side of her personality for some reason. I always figured that it was because i was much younger than her. If i tried to joke with her or take part in stuff like that she would just ignore me or roll her eyes. Yet it was weird that she discussed the serious side of her sex life with me, which she didn't discuss with her other male 'buddies'. If she was dating some guy she would tell me the next day how the sex was, what position etc.

 

Anyway if anyone still cares and wants an update - we were supposed to meet up last sunday to discuss it, but things came up for all of us so we couldn't. We ended up getting together tuesday night and at first when we all sat down to discuss it things seemed to be going fine. When i said i would be up for it things became a little more awkward. It was like "ok now what" followed by some nervous smiles and chuckles. They went in really confident about it but their mood changed a little when they realized what they were getting into.

 

Basically i said i would do it on a few conditions. I brought up the filming issue and said that i wouldn't be comfortable knowing that there is footage of me in someone elses hands. They said i could trust them because they would not want it getting out just as much as i did, but said that they could live without it (for now that is...maybe try it another time). I also told them that i didn't want this to somehow mess up their relationship, and they assured me that it would be ok since they had both agreed on it and were fully willing to go through with it. We agreed that as long as we were totally open about everything, then things would be ok. We also discussed other tiny details to iron it all out.

 

Now the thing that has got me interested is that her husband said that he would be willing to give Anna and I some time alone to have a few 'trial runs' to get used to each other. He said that if he was uncomfortable with that then he wouldn't have gotten into this whole thing in the first place.

 

I managed to talk to Anna yesterday one on one, to make sure that she was willing to do it, and that she wasn't doing it just for her husband. She assured me that she was totally into the whole fantasy, and was actually surprised i was not more eager considering the fact that i've always had a big crush on her. Not only that but she reminded me how her sex drive is going crazy these days so the more sex for her the better.

 

If all goes well something should happen next weekend (not this one since we all have other plans made)

[MichelleS1983]

Quite honestly, she sounds like a complete pig. What a revolting picture you've painted, this woman 5 months pregnant (and obviously showing big time) getting banged while her drooling letch husband jerks off and films it.

 

You'll be famous when your video hits the internet. I'm sure your mother will be proud.

[carhill]

I managed to talk to Anna yesterday one on one, to make sure that she was willing to do it, and that she wasn't doing it just for her husband. She assured me that she was totally into the whole fantasy, and was actually surprised i was not more eager considering the fact that i've always had a big crush on her. Not only that but she reminded me how her sex drive is going crazy these days so the more sex for her the better.

 

You know, I'm going to swim upstream here and opine that going through with this will actually help you. One, it will pop your fantasy of Anna. Two, it will be a great life lesson for you in how decisions have consequences, and often unexpected ones.

 

Perhaps, after, you can see Anna for who she really is and your crush for really what it was and then move on to women you can have a healthy relationship with. As long as you're comfortable being filmed (they can easily obscure your face if so desired), I'd say go for it

[OWoman]

As long as you're comfortable being filmed (they can easily obscure your face if so desired), I'd say go for it

 

Wear a mask! That way you don't have to rely on someone's photoshop skills (or their goodwill to do it). Besides, think how much more fun it could be if you were play-acting the role of, say, George W invading Iran, or Sperminator II?

[carhill]

Wear a mask!

 

Ah, the voice of experience

 

Great idea!