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support or not support while in IC


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Mino,

 

I supported my MM while he was in IC, he was already separated. I even went with him to one session. All I can say is that it takes a very stong person to be there for them when you are hurting too. I wanted him to to be able to sort his feelings out, to be at peace with his decisions. But in a way it was soul destroying, because you never know what the true feelings are that come out of those sessions..

 

Hugs, I know how hard it is. Do whats best for you.

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Resentment, yes. Lets talk about that...

 

Don't you think this is especiallly true (the mm feeling resentful) when the ow finally says, no more of "this", after going along with "this" for some time?

 

One familiar Cycle:

• The OW grows increasingly more resentful that her mm has both the w and ow in his ilfe.

• The ow only knows only what the mm tells her about his m.

• Ow wrestles with trust. In mm not leaving his w, trust diminishes (was there more to their relationship than he told me---?

OW calls it off due to her resentment.

• mm feels resentful that ow cut it off, as she went along for it for so long (and doesn't understand how complicated his situation is---)

I agree , I see it on my R. It has gotten to the point where I cant stop talking, questioning him everyday. I see he is stressing even more. But I cant help it. I get the same answers again and again.

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