I used to adore H, now I’m not attracted any more

[totalbtch]

If all a woman has is just looks I just play with her for a while and throw her back but a woman has to have some depth in order for me to make any effort into making a relationship work with her.

I think you just said it!

You would just ‘play with her for a while’. So, it’s not that you don’t want her, you just want her for a while (whatever that means in your world).

When I (and, I am pretty confident to say, many other women) say ‘we don’t want other guys’, we don’t want them – full stop - it doesn’t mean ‘we just want to play with them for a while’, it doesn’t mean we have to look at them or we'll die, it doesn’t mean we want to use them and then spit them out… It means we don't want them. And we expect the same from you. Too much?

 

If a woman is hot but stupid – does it justify you using her??

 

They are pseudo intellectuals who think they are sophicticated and they do have booksmartts but know nothing about life.

Maybe you just don’t understand them because they are smarter than you?

From my experience, people who like to put down intellectuals are not very smart themselves.

 

… but know nothing about life.

And you do?

 

I would rather have an honest and upfront bimbo because at least then I would know what I am getting.

Are you trying to prove my point?

Off course you would rather have a bimbo – you get to play with her for a while and she is not a threat to your self-esteem.

BTW, you can’t be more wrong when you say that with bimbos you know what you are getting – in fact it's the opposite.

And, what is an ‘upfront bimbo’? Bimbos don’t think about themselves as bimbos, they would be offended if you told them they are one. Bimbos are not like players (proud to be one)

 

As I thought – you are afraid of an intelligent woman....

Although you can handle an intelligent woman who doesn’t show her intelligence and who agrees with you.

[totalbtch]

What ways are these?

Yes, what ways are these?

[totalbtch]

I don't think highly of most women but I make exceptions for women that prove themselves.

Who prove themselves?

How do you prove yourself?

 

Or, do you think you don't have to, men don't have to prove themselves, it's only women who have to do those things?

[Woggle]

Who prove themselves?

How do you prove yourself?

 

Or, do you think you don't have to, men don't have to prove themselves, it's only women who have to do those things?

 

In my world it is women who have betrayed me time and time again so yes they have to prove themselves to me. I know there are good women but I proceed with caution when it comes to the female gender.

[totalbtch]

No man worth having wants a shallow woman.

(Almost missed this one)

 

Similarly, no woman worth having wants a shallow man.

 

But when we say that men are shallow, your response is that women are shallow too.

Bottom line:

If you are a shallow man, you can only expect to be accepted/desired by shallow women – like it or not.

Women that are not shallow will either not want you or will try to change you.

[totalbtch]

In my world it is women who have betrayed me time and time again so yes they have to prove themselves to me. I know there are good women but I proceed with caution when it comes to the female gender.

Do you think you have to prove yourself to them?

[Woggle]

Do you think you have to prove yourself to them?

 

I probably do but I tend to give men the benefit of the doubt.

[totalbtch]

I probably do but I tend to give men the benefit of the doubt.

But you don't give women the benefit of the doubt?

Why?

[Woggle]

But you don't give women the benefit of the doubt?

Why?

 

 

Because women on an average are much less trustworthy. Men are loyal while a woman will turn on you in a heartbeat.

[totalbtch]

Because women on an average are much less trustworthy. Men are loyal while a woman will turn on you in a heartbeat.

You may have something here.

I have mostly male friends.

 

So, on average, you are right.

 

My problem is; once you find a woman who is not average, who loves you, respects you and all that…

 

Why do you keep looking for all those hot women who (on average) will betray you and be disloyal to you?

 

Even when this one loyal, non-average woman begs you not to?

 

Why do you feel you will die if you stop that?

 

Because your loyal, not –average woman who loves you sees it as a betrayal.

(And I don’t mean your wife, I mean in general)

[Woggle]

You may have something here.

I have mostly male friends.

 

So, on average, you are right.

 

My problem is; once you find a woman who is not average, who loves you, respects you and all that…

 

Why do you keep looking for all those hot women who (on average) will betray you and be disloyal to you?

 

Even when this one loyal, non-average woman begs you not to?

 

Why do you feel you will die if you stop that?

 

Because your loyal, not –average woman who loves you sees it as a betrayal.

(And I don’t mean your wife, I mean in general)

 

I don't look for any other woman but my wife but I still notice that other women are attractive. It is part of human nature for both to genders to notice this. In fact I think there is some honor in a looking at a gorgous woman and saying damn she's hot but it's would be worth ruining what I have with my wife.

[totalbtch]

I don't look for any other woman but my wife but I still notice that other women are attractive. It is part of human nature for both to genders to notice this. In fact I think there is some honor in a looking at a gorgous woman and saying damn she's hot but it's would be worth ruining what I have with my wife.

See, that’s interesting.

You think it’s honourable to resist the temptation.

 

I think you we should not be tempted in the first place.

 

When you say ‘is it worth ruining what I have with my wife’, isn’t it just weighing pros and cons of your actions?

 

You are trying to decide what is best for YOU. It’s totally self-oriented.

 

It’s not that you love your wife and don’t want other women – it’s that you THINK it would be better for YOU to stay with your wife (mostly because what she can do for you)

[Woggle]

Human beings are flawed and temptation is only natural. To use self control and resist that temptation is a very honorable thing.

 

I very much do love my wife and that is why I don't want to lose her. I know that cheating would mean the death of my marriage so I would never do it. My wife is worth forsaking all other and that is an honor in and of itself for her.

[Capricorn]

So basically no matter who a man is with he will always sexually desire other women and be fighting himself not to act on these urges? Wow how cute. Then you have us decent women who only have eyes for our own man but over time we see we are not the only ones our men have eyes for. So we end up with a broken heart and hurt. Then we figure why should I only have eyes for him when he will never truely just only have eyes for me! No wonder why women cheat!

[Woggle]

So basically no matter who a man is with he will always sexually desire other women and be fighting himself not to act on these urges? Wow how cute. Then you have us decent women who only have eyes for our own man but over time we see we are not the only ones our men have eyes for. So we end up with a broken heart and hurt. Then we figure why should I only have eyes for him when he will never truely just only have eyes for me! No wonder why women cheat!

 

Women look at other men as well. Please don't act like women are some saints when in reality they are not much different than men.

[rainfall]

Women look at other men as well. Please don't act like women are some saints when in reality they are not much different than men.

 

 

Yes some women look. However I would guess there are alot more women that don't look and don't want to look at other men then their are men who don't want to look at other women.

[Capricorn]

Actually I don't notice other men and I don't care what they look like!!! When I'm out in public with my man my eyes are on him not staring at other men! When I was younger I had crushes on some musicians that I really admire and love their music but I didn't sit around dreaming about banging them and never even saw nude pictures or anything of these guys. Yeah women may admire some handsome men but I know I personally don't wonder about screwing other guys and I don't care about what they look like nude!

[DarlingDoll]

you probably are not as attractive as you think

[Capricorn]

Not that attractive?Whoever your commenting to what does that have to do with the topic?

[OpenBook]

I look at my H (he is a few years older) and I see an old man... What I feel now is that he is actually an old man and him looking at those girls is almost disgusting. In fact, I pity him and all the other men that behave that way. I think to myself – you poor guys, you are so fascinated by something so superficial and irrelevant.

 

Men do not think the way we women do. They are totally different animals. Very visual, one-track minds, a lot more dwelling on thoughts of sex, yada yada. I will never understand them myself, although I have spent a lifetime trying. It'll just never happen.

 

Also, I read that at a certain age (40's? 50's?) men's brains start to shrink. Literally. I'm not sure if they've tied that to the male propensity toward mid-life crises or not.

 

In my world it is women who have betrayed me time and time again so yes they have to prove themselves to me. I know there are good women but I proceed with caution when it comes to the female gender.

 

I probably do but I tend to give men the benefit of the doubt.

 

Because women on an average are much less trustworthy. Men are loyal while a woman will turn on you in a heartbeat.

 

Woggle you are my mirror image -- I feel this exact same way, but reversed. Just switch out "men" with "women" (and vice versa) in everything you said, and it could be me talking. This is almost creepy.