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If My Life Is Not My Own, Then Who's?


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i ask this question because i am confused who's life is mine?

i have three part time jobs, i bring home approximately $300.00 per week.


today i had a dentist appt. and was to work at one job for about 2-3 hours.


the temp is 10 degrees the windchill is minus 4. i did not feel like going to the one job.


however this evening i do work from 4-11 p.m. and i full intend to go to that job.


today this morning however i did not feel like going out in the cold, i did not feel like leaving the house.


so my boyfriend got mad at me for both! yes he pays the rent, i pay the house bills.


so he pays more then i do, but does that mean i have to do every little thing that he thinks i should do just to keep peace between us?


i feel at his mercy so much of the time, that i feel that my life is not my own half the time.


is this fair?

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It doesn't make any difference whether it's fair or not. That's a personal judgement that anybody can make. The reality is that your boyfriend is putting you in an uncomfortable situation and putting pressure on you that is unsettling.


If you can't convince your boyfriend to change the way he things, I suggest you find a boyfriend whose values and judgement calls are more similar to yours.


Good luck!

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Not to be mean or anything, but I think you're really acting like a child here. Some days I don't want to go out from my house either, some days it's -15 degrees celcius here, snowing and the wind is icecold, and I still have to go to school even though I'd rather be in my cozy bed the whole day instead.


Try to look at it from your boyfriends perspective instead. What if your boyfriend started moaning about not feeling like he wants to go to work for no good reason. That would be quite annoying, wouldn't it? And I'm sure you'd think that he's acting like a child too. No wonder he's getting mad at you, because probably he feels like as if he's your father. My suggestion is that if situations like this come up for you again, take it like a grown up woman and just go to work.

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