Keara Posted June 10, 2007 Posted June 10, 2007 First time here.. I wondered if this seems out of whack to you, and what I could do or say to make the situation better. My bf, of several years, was making fun of my driving today. To the extent of making it a point of saying he was still composing himself after parking, and walking several yards into a store. It annoyed me, and I explained myself, he said he wasn't judging me... but then made it known that he really thinks I don't drive well. So I let it go, even though I was kind of upset about it. (if you think my driving sucks, then don't ask me to drive.) I asked him (after several long minutes of neither of us saying anything) if he'd like to pick up something he said he'd needed after we were done there. He said no. I asked if it was because he was upset with me. He didn't flat out say yes, but acknowledged that was why. Several long minutes of no talking go by and he launches into how I'm too defensive, and how its ruining "us". Which made me mad because I thought I was being calm about the whole thing. I stopped saying anything, just paid for my stuff and we left. I handed him the keys so he could drive home. He wouldn't say a thing to me all the way home. I started crying a little, didn't mean to. He ignored me. We pull into our driveway, and he leaves the car running and gets out. Don't remember what I said, but he responded and started telling me he wasn't calling my driving bad, but that I had bad habits, and that I was too defensive and reading what I wanted to into his words. Then he walks inside... So I left and went and did all the other errands I had to do, that we'd gone out to do in the first place. I get home, he's sleeping. Several hours later, he gets up, puts his shoes on and grabs his keys... starts walking out the door. I asked where he was going, and he said to visit a friend. Then gone... I didn't think this was that big deal. I don't like having people make fun of my driving to the extent that they're still commenting on it after we get out of the car. But I didn't think I was being overly defensive. Just normal irritated when you feel like someone is taking a joke a little too far. How would you have reacted to this type of behavior? Or how do you react when people are ragging on you about stuff that seems kind of over the top to you? Am I just too insecure or something? Would any of this annoy you at all? I honestly took his joking to mean that he thinks I'm a bad driver. Am I way out in left field? What would you do at this point if you were in this situation?
BlueEyedSarah Posted June 10, 2007 Posted June 10, 2007 My friend says I am defensive when ever he makes a joke about my bad habits, I just never said anything when he joked about something because he would just carry on about it. Then I tried explaining myself but that got him mad, so now when he jokes about my bad habbits I usually follow along and laugh at myself with him. Even if I get upset about it I just think...whatever! I find myself too sensative. Do you consider yourself a sensative person? If so maybe next time just accept he's jokes and go along with it. Or you could try another aproach if this joke he said was not a nice card to deal then to talk to him about it and get to the bottom of why he said what he said.
Author Keara Posted June 10, 2007 Author Posted June 10, 2007 I have a hard time laughing off something when its someone I love and live with. But what the heck do I do now? He's still pissed at me. Is still out with friends. He's going to come home pissed, and convinced that I'm overly defensive. And anything I say to the contrary will just further that belief. I usually laugh stuff off, but sometimes it seems like it's just too much.
BlueEyedSarah Posted June 10, 2007 Posted June 10, 2007 Thats silly that he has to be angry over something so small. Must be he's man period due... Is he having a difficult time with anything? Is something bothering him? Something on he's mind? Have you tried to talk to him about whats making him angry? If you have not tried that than I suggest you try that. If you have tried that then maybe he might just need time to cool off. Do you have any friends you can go see? I suggest since he is with he's friend you should head off somewhere else and have fun to keep your mind off him being all angry. Maybe stay at someone else house until he is ready to talk to you and he stops acting like a big kid!
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