nathanashbyuk Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Hi im looking for a GF i was wondering if theres any tip to chatting to girls or anything particular i should do to pull .
oppath Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 What are your goals and why do you think you've waited to enter the game? First, NO RELATIONSHIPS FOR AT LEAST 6 MONTHS of learning how to date. The reason I suggest this is because you likely struggle with approach anxiety and anxiety in general with woman. Overcoming those issues and learning life skills is more important than a relationship. And the good thing is, you can overcome most of those issues without necessarily dating.Find 3 passions, coed ones, and do them weekly. Talk to everybody, male and female. Chat up everyone you see, in line at the store, the barista, everyone. Become comfortable making small talk.Start asking MALE acquaintances and friends to hang. I'm serious. First, you'll tap into some of their energy, but more importantly, the stakes aren't as high. I used to be nervous calling guy friends because I was scared of rejection, and to call a girl I'd hold the phone in my hand for an hour. Taking risks with guys was more safe, but it was the same fear, and when I could confidently ask a guy I knew, not necessarily well, to go grab a beer, I was much more confident at asking a woman the same thing.Keep your expectations in check. Don't compare yourself to others, desire to be dating 5 girls at one time, or beat yourself up if you are rejected or do something wrong. We all makes fools out of ourselves when dating. You are bettering yourself, it is a journey, have patience and persistence but also compassion for yourself.don't settle. this relates to #1, but you may find yourself unused to the female attention and choose someone WRONG for you. This in itself will be a valuable learning experience, but it comes back to one thing: be comfortable and confident dating FIRST before having a gf, because it is important to learn those skills. Otherwise, if you get crushed by a girl, you will be back at square one. Gain confidence, take your time, and choose wisely.Make new guy friends. Make this an equal goal.Make female friends without the pressure of dating. This seems counter intuitive, but the goal is to enlarge your social circle and take risks not dependent on a romantic outcome. Yes, you should ask people out on dates, BUT you need to become comfortable around women you don't know and engaging them in your life. In a romantic context, you need to escalate early in the "relationship" and not be just friends, but if you need to be able to walk up stairs too.
LoveLace Posted June 7, 2007 Posted June 7, 2007 Be yourself. It's the oldest and best advice there is. oppath has given some good tips too. Especially #4...it's all about trial and error. "You have to kiss a lot of frogs". Have confidence but not to the point where your being totally fake.
GregsBad Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 Bros before Hoes Use protection - don't get anyone pregnant. Never Lie Be honest about what you want - you'll find girls who want what you want. Do NOT get into a serious relationship with any chick until you've got your education, and other goals worked out - some much more important things in life. A realtionship now will totally impair you from making better decsions later on - decsions that should NOT be made now. Don't lie to them about that either. Tell them you're NOT intersted in a serious relationship. You're building you life, now. That's being honest, manly and you'll get laid more that way too NEVER LIE. Girls will tell you to get into a realtionship ... But girls are on the other team - they're from Venus They network OK ... a girl will send you down the street into another girls relationship. She knows the favor will come back from another girl. Sort of like lawyers. Girls commuincate with each other in frequencies not even dogs or porpoises can understand. Don't try to understand it ... it'll make you crazy. And don't kiss frogs, young man - you'll give them pimples. Did I mention not to lie? Oh ... and that thing about flowers? They didn't make that one up. It really pisses all of them off if you don't. Then some of them will walk on you if you do. I haven't figured that out yet. I usually wait til I see signs that she pissed for non-flowers. That seems to minimze the risk that she'll think you're a wussy for it. Only wussy's by flowers too soon. But you'll avoid relationships anyway right?
Green Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 first off work on yourself first and foremost girls like guys who take care of themselves. So work on moving foward in your dream career goals, for instance if your dream is opening a business take steps to get closer to doing that, or if your dream is painting then paint alot. Take care of your body, as in go to the gym and eat healthy. Be confident and make an effort practice makes perfect when it comes to dating. dont let yourself get to obsessed or into a girl youve just met because most likely it wont last so wait till youve know the person atleast 2 months before you start getting real emotionaly invested. Be yourself, say what you want, do what you want, and if you want to kiss her well go in there and try to get that kiss you want, my point is dont be some fake person who tries to be everything that you think the other person wants it wont go over well.
Author nathanashbyuk Posted June 9, 2007 Author Posted June 9, 2007 Thanks everyone.. Some great tips that im ganna take into thought and apply them in my life and start by making friends and rowing confediance before i start going out there looking for a girl.. Thanks once aging you all helped me loads
FEEDTHEID Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 Hi im looking for a GF i was wondering if theres any tip to chatting to girls or anything particular i should do to pull . Good advice from first post, I would add a few things. DO NOT TREAT WOMEN DIFFERENT THAN YOUR MALE FRIENDS. By this I mean do you buy your male friends dinner or pay for everything in general? Do you agree with everything your male friends say? Will you keep doing favors like a servant for your friends? Are you willing to sacrifice your own sense of self to make your male friends happy? You hopefully answered a strong NO! If your friends tried to buy your friendship, had no spine etc.. would you want to hang out with them? There's no difference with dating. Dating means nothing more than making strong friendships with the opposite sex. If anything else rises great if not just having female friends will get rid of anxiety. The only difference is if you don't want to get stuck in the friendship zone FLIRT. How? Think about when you were little you teased the girls you liked. Not mean, not maliciously, but playfully. If a girl is an inch shorter ask if she has to shop in the kid's section. If she snorts when she laughs call her mr Ed (smile when you do this). If you get a "you jerk" or a hit in the arm look at what she's really saying usually (99.9) women understand you are flirting and are excited and enjoy this. if she is truly offended "run Forest, run!" Make physical contact. This is huge! This shows 1. you're confident (#1 in attracting women) 2. You are open to taking this interaction further. Make this contact with just female friends and those that you are interested in as more than just friends. BE FUN! DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE OUTCOME! This is the heart of the be yourself advice. If you are stressed about the outcome you will look needy #1 killer of attraction Take care of yourself physically. Past daily showers, which should be obvious, cut your nails, look for a wardrobe and hair cut that suits your personality. I could go on and on. Do these things till they are 2nd nature If you ever have questions let me know. I spent a lot of time learning techniques to make myself more appealling to the opposite sex. Now that I have found an amazing woman I miss "the chase" but giving that up is a small price. If I can pass some of it on it's the next best thing. two last things 1 DO NOT STOP ATTRACTING THE WOMAN ONCE YOU ARE TOGETHER. Keep doing what made her have an interest in you, or lose her. 2 MAKE and KEEP YOUR MALE FRIENDS. Girls may come and go but true buddies will be there for you as long as you dont forsake them
Green Posted June 9, 2007 Posted June 9, 2007 no my best tip is start flirting and talking and asking girls out at every chance you get, girls hate procastination. work on yourself and grow always but dont give up any chances with women you see
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