AS Posted January 7, 2003 Share Posted January 7, 2003 I began with my gf almost two years ago. She was in a rel. w/ another reporter at her TV station. It was way wrong. I at first said no to an advance or two. I had a "relapse" on alcohol. 3 weeks, after, she and I began. It has been tough. Trust issues....her dad left when she was 9. Her mom is an old-school Chinese lady who hates me, as does her brother. My ex-gf has told me that her mom always breaks up her rel w/ her bf--she once cut her off in college for two yrs b/c her at the time Chinese bf was an atheist. The mom moved in suddenly 1 year ago during domestic violence problems with husband number 3. She has continually tried to break us up. She once threw plates at me and called my ex-gf a slut and a prostitute...and mer garbage, et al. Lots of drama. My ex and I started some couples therapy. Approximately 2-4 weeks later, she brought up marriage...and living w/ her mom for another yr to help her "transition" from her divorce. We were on a downward spiral from that very moment. After wkg so hard, and beginning to turn the corner thru prayer, growth and counseling....it seems as though the mom thing finally broke her love for me. I have been sober for the duration of our rel. I have been faithful. We have/had been exclusive for a year, with no infidelity. I really love her, despite all. I really want her back in my life. Letters? I have tended to be the "thoughtful" one in our relationship. I treated her extremely well, w/ lots of love. I know she still loves me, but she was sobbing on Christmas eve saying it was just "too hard." I really love this woman. I am very willing to change, to be more patient re: the mother, to work with the Christian influences that changed our love life. HELP. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted January 7, 2003 Share Posted January 7, 2003 Continue with working on yourself and the relationship. I don't think you ought to think about any major moves in your relationship right now. I think you have lots more work to do on yourself and the relationship needs some fine tuning. The two of you are certainly moving in the right direction and you should continue that way. This lady needs to see some major, consistent changes in you and she's not a perfect being herself. Her mother sounds like a terror. Give yourself lots of time to analyze this and see where it goes. Don't be in any rush to make things happen. Just concentrate on being the best human being you possibly can. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AS Posted January 7, 2003 Author Share Posted January 7, 2003 Did I mention she broke up/ me on Dec 20th? We exchanged gifts Christmas eve. She said she was done, as she has said before. She used to hide outside my door a few weeks after she was "done." I hope to reconcile. Link to post Share on other sites
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