callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 He buys women's T-shirts from the ladies' departmental store for himself.... the kind with a collar and about 2-5 buttons down your chest. Not sure what it's called; Polo T-shirts or something. His Reasons: * likes the cutting of the shirts better * fits better than men's shirts that are available Truth be told, I feel kinda embarassed because it's obvious from the cutting & design of the shirts that it's tailored for women and not for men. Like the slit at both sides from hip to waist is another telltale + the no of buttons for men's vs women's shirts differ. P/S: He does try to choose the shirts with "minimum glitter" :o:o 1
dasein Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Find more fashionable stores with male shirts, steer him clear of department stores. Most dept store men's shirts are oversized and cut for the comfort of the average overweight consumer. If budget is a concern many overstock type stores carry more fashionable male attire. Good luck.
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Find more fashionable stores with male shirts, steer him clear of department stores. Most dept store men's shirts are oversized and cut for the comfort of the average overweight consumer. If budget is a concern many overstock type stores carry more fashionable male attire. Good luck. Thanks for your reply, but he's not overweight. Yup, I got him a few fitting ones (correct size) from Male stores & brands but he just refused to wear them. Sigh!
dasein Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Sorry, was saying that one reason he may find many male shirts unappealing is that they are cut for OW men, not that he is OW.
dasein Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 BTW, Does he exhibit fondness for wearing women's clothing in other ways? or just the shirts?
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 BTW, Does he exhibit fondness for wearing women's clothing in other ways? or just the shirts? Well... he's a performing dancer and some of their past costumes have way too much sequins and beads and shiny glittery cloth. He's one of the 2 men on the team and seriously, he's hobby is to sew these costumes and props for them. Plus, pants that are tights, which dancers commonly wear. No skirts or dresses. Ummmm.... his swimsuit is a box-shorts type, he'll never wear the underwear cutting types. Any clues there??? He's close to 40 years old and has never dated a girl. Tried asking if he was gay (in a subtle way ) but he laughed it off and said "no". Most guys I know wouldn't even touch a normal round neck T-shirt if the design on it was in any way girly, but this guy is so at ease with clothes that are UNMANLY....
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I would hide my panties if I were you. I don't think he'd touch my undies... :p:p Which brings me to another point.... he never wears man-undies under his jeans/pants/shorts. Neither woman-undies. Just no undies. Help me figure this guy out ya'll.... what's the deal with him?
january2011 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 You might have to accept that this is how he prefers to dress. If he is comfortable with who he is. Happy being who he is. Perhaps you need to learn to be comfortable and happy with who he is rather than trying to change him. 1
dasein Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Are you and he BF/GF? I know men who are totally hetero yet have a pronounced feminine side and closeted homo men who like to have a beard. Only you are in a position to know which, and since you asked about clothes and not sexual habits will leave it at that.
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 You might have to accept that this is how he prefers to dress. If he is comfortable with who he is. Happy being who he is. Perhaps you need to learn to be comfortable and happy with who he is rather than trying to change him. This issue is one of the many things that led to our break up. Maybe I'm too closed-minded, fussing over his wearing shirts designed for women. But one occasion a long time ago, when we were out together, a lady stranger walking toward us was wearing the same shirt he had on that day. :o:o:o:o Are you and he BF/GF? I know men who are totally hetero yet have a pronounced feminine side and closeted homo men who like to have a beard. Only you are in a position to know which, and since you asked about clothes and not sexual habits will leave it at that. He's the EX. I'm thinking he's the closeted type too... But that's the past. Just been wondering about these things and wanted to get it off my chest. Thank you all so much for the support and feedback. It helped.
mtber75 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 He's probably a drag queen? Won't be a surprise if he is gay. Nothing wrong with that (probably be wrong for you). Maybe ask him to seek professional help (therapy) to step out of the closet. Wanting to wear women's clothes is just weird?
dasein Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Hey it's good you posted this and got it off your chest! Now for the patented dating board admonition... he's an ex... time to move onward upward and forward to other options. Spend time you would have spent worrying about an ex's habits on cultivating other options or working on yourself. Good luck.
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Wanting to wear women's clothes is just weird? I'm just speculating this, but could a man who was rejected by a woman who turns out to be a lesbian react this way? Let me rephrase that: Could this be some sort of reaction to being rejected by a female lesbian? Is this linked to his choice of clothes since that particular lesbian-couple dress in masculine clothes (both in pants and short hair) anyways. He says he's never dated all these 40 years but I know about his former interest in a certain woman, but she's clearly a lesbian with a partner for many years. Nope he probably never got a date in that woman, but I can try to understand the mental-torture he faced: "You'd chose a woman over me?" The Plot Thickens.... muahahaha :D:D
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Hey it's good you posted this and got it off your chest! Now for the patented dating board admonition... he's an ex... time to move onward upward and forward to other options. Spend time you would have spent worrying about an ex's habits on cultivating other options or working on yourself. Good luck. Just one of those days mate. I'm so done and through, no turning back. Just my first time sharing with anyone about these things and glad to hear some comments other than my own thoughts on the matter. Forward, onwards and upwards Dasein :cool:
Ninjainpajamas Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I honestly don't understand how women choose to date feminine men...i mean why not just be a lesbian? There's just no masculinity whatsoever radiating from these guys to the point It's just confusing. I seen some pretty meterosexual guys walking around Los Angeles...usually the tiny frame/short guys and It's becoming a little more difficult telling the straight ones from the not so straight ones. The whole earrings, beyonce sunglasses, tiny collar ****, wearing no socks...I'm like wtf is going on here? should I shake your hand or break out into song "All the single laides!...All the single ladies!.."The asian guys I've seen can almost pass for either or, straight or not. Doesn't make a difference to me If that's your interest, and I ultimately don't really care, I just don't really get the appeal...I guess their just easy to talk to and get along with? I can't imagine the relationship being much different than having a gay bestie that you're also sleeping with. 1
gaius Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm just speculating this, but could a man who was rejected by a woman who turns out to be a lesbian react this way? Let me rephrase that: Could this be some sort of reaction to being rejected by a female lesbian? Is this linked to his choice of clothes since that particular lesbian-couple dress in masculine clothes (both in pants and short hair) anyways. I don't think so. Guys with sexual hangups will often go after women they know don't want them. Sounds like he might have some gender issues he doesn't want to address. 2
FitChick Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I had a friend who dated a TV producer of a very famous, critically acclaimed TV show. He looked very masculine, had been married a couple of times, had grown kids. She told me he wore very expensive women's underwear, including bras, under his clothes. I noticed that he always wore a suit jacket to hide the bra band and straps. He also had her wear stilettos in bed when they had sex. Very kinky guy and you'd never suspect him of anything like that. 1
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 (edited) Guys with sexual hangups will often go after women they know don't want them. *Putting my hand up* That would be me - the first girl who gave in to go on a date with him. After some 3 years of dodging him, and turning him down.... that is. Now he's gone, but I'm still trying to get his mama to stop calling me. @ http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/322655-not-ex-but-his-mum My other thread Edited April 18, 2012 by callmegee 1
kaylan Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 (edited) Its just clothing people. Get over it. Dasein is right. A good portion of mens clothing is cut like crap. I get all my tee from H&M. Euro store with good form fitting cuts for men. And if I could afford it, Id shop at express a lot. Honestly what your boyfriend is doing says nothing about his sexuality, and there are some close minded people in this thread. Styles change all the time, and whats deemed masculine or feminine is really subjective. Remember when skinny jeans first made their resurgence with men several years back? I do. And I remember kids in the hardcore and punk scene would buy womens jeans because most places werent making form fitting jeans for guys yet. A style is a style, and if someone is comfy in certain clothing, let em be comfy. I dont understand some styles myself, but Im not gonna hate. Then again, I used to be a weird punk kid back in my teens and early 20s. I wore tight plaid bondage pants, painted my nails, had piercings and weird hair, and played bass in a street punk band. Guess what? Girls I was around didnt think I was gay, and hell, I even had some preppy chicks and skater chicks who liked me. Nowadays I rock fitted tees, form fitting jeans, button downs and vans...but Im not gonna hate on someones fashion choice thats less "normal" than my current one. Why? Because Ive done some off the cuff things fashion wise myself. Maybe Im just different. Ive been attracted to a large variety of women. Pretty is pretty to me. Ive crushed on the most petite feminine girls out there, Im crushed on grungy hippy girls, and Ive crushed on a couple of Amazon-ish jock girls. You know the type...tall, strong, but still curvy with long hair. Girls like Hope Solo of the US Womens Soccer team. Id do so many things to that woman. All in all, clothing type doesnt matter much to me, as long as the girl has style. I do have a favorite type of style I like to see women in, but Im open to many different styles. Edited April 18, 2012 by kaylan 1
FitChick Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 He says he's never dated all these 40 years Isn't this more of a red flag than his wardrobe? 2
threebyfate Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Hold it. He's your ex and even if he's your SO, what difference does it make if he prefers buttons on the other side of the shirt collar? A pretty meaningless thing to fixate on.
Feelin Frisky Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 That is surely an unmanly tendency. Most masculine men don't give a crap about their own underwear (as long as it's clean, not itchy, and fits). To go traipsing into the women's underwear section of the department store and handling undies for one's self provokes the manner in the OP's avatar--oh Jesus.
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Hm. Why do you concern yourself with what kind of shirts he wears, now that you are broken up? And he'd never dated in his whole life? But he had the hots for a lesbian? Curiouser and curiouser!
Author callmegee Posted April 22, 2012 Author Posted April 22, 2012 (edited) Behold.... my new signature. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Not my video, but I'm sure a few of us can relate. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Edited April 22, 2012 by callmegee
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