callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 It's over between me and him and we're not in contact with each other as neither of us want to remain friends. My problem is with his MUM as she is an old lady and she's not accepting the fact that I am not her "future-daughter-in-law" any more. She calls me on the average 3 times a week to chat and try to persuade me to get back together with her son. (She's hinting that I chase him for a change) I've tried explaining to her nicely that we are both moving on with our lives and that it's a mutual decision between her son and me, but she's still got her hopes up that someday I'll be back together with her son.... So I've been entertaining her calls and trying to be nice, but now I'm thinking of giving her the cold shoulder and stop answering her calls altogether.... what do you think??? I'd feel horrible to ignore her but.... sigh! what's a girl to do....? Some help please....
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Go NC; she sounds like a nuisance and selfish; not considering your feelings on the matter. I cringed when I read the part where she asked you to chase him for a change. 1
TaraMaiden Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Break Nc with him, and ask him to tell his mum to lay off. Then re-establish NC. Both ways. 2
gaius Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I feel bad for everyone involved. She's desperately trying to get the normal son she wants and he can't just be himself and put on a dress and high heels. Now you're stuck in the middle. I would just ignore her calls. If that doesn't stop her then just be honest. He likes to wear women's clothes and you don't think it could ever work out no matter what you do. 2
Author callmegee Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 LOL :laugh: Hi again Gaius. Thanks Tara & Bewitched. More info @ http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/322665-feeling-embarassed-he-wears-womens-shirts :p:p Me's gonna be brave and ignore the mama. :cool: 1
Author callmegee Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 She's gonna call again this weekend and I know I must be brave and maintain NC with BOTH son & mom. God, help me. It's hard to have to let down an elderly lady like this. I feel really horrible. But I know I cannot let her keep a foothold in my life like this with her unrealistic hopes. If I answer her call, 1) She'd keep the calls coming - I don't want that a consistent reminder of the past to be carried into my future, if you know what I mean. 2) She could be spying on behalf of her son. Or at least reporting back what she knows to him. He doesn't want to get back together and neither do I. 3) She'll tell me she still has hopes of a "reunion" and then I'd have to tell her all over again why that is not gonna happen. Weird huh? Not a clingy ex, but a clingy mum to deal with. :rolleyes: Must keep up no contact... Must maintain no contact... No contact all the way... Cannot answer her calls... Be strong, just ignore her... Aaaarrrrggghhh!!!!
TaraMaiden Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Picture her playing a banjo, smoking a pipe and standing with her underwear round her ankles... Why would you want to keep in touch with a crazy ole lady like that - ?! 2
geegirl Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Picture her playing a banjo, smoking a pipe and standing with her underwear round her ankles... Why would you want to keep in touch with a crazy ole lady like that - ?! I needed the laugh!
darkmoon Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 old ladies know that we can play that card (i do with utiliity companies) and when younger i felt like you about them but you are dealing a person of much experience who - notably - so far has you at her beck and call and is well-aware that you are malleable she is too old not to do not buy into her manipulative game
Author callmegee Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 successfully ignored about 3 calls over the past 10 days, just that the weekend is here and I'm getting ready to ignore more calls from her. Sigh!
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 20, 2012 Posted April 20, 2012 LOL :laugh: Hi again Gaius. Thanks Tara & Bewitched. More info @ http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/322665-feeling-embarassed-he-wears-womens-shirts :p:p Me's gonna be brave and ignore the mama. :cool: ...I read that yesterday and have come back after laughing so hard; needed to collect myself...Because I can relate. My ex saved all his ex wife's personal notions and feminine products. Each time I was over there, her old pads and douche were still under the sink gathering dust from a year gone by. Did he think he would need these for his period? And what about the nail polish remover and other Avon products all over his bathroom? I often wondered if he wore the thigh highs and baby doll nighties I left over there. He had this 'thing' for pantyhose. Yet when I wore them, he didn't go near me. Maybe he wanted them for himself..... If many think your fellow is gay or wants to be a woman, I bet the chances are pretty good they are right. Many told me the same thing about my ex and I am just waiting for the story to unfold, LOL; he is with someone new now, but I often wonder....is that stuff still around the house for her to see? Women's shirts are women's shirts...there's no way to sugar coat when a fellow enjoys wearing ladies' clothing......Could you change your number? 1
Author callmegee Posted April 21, 2012 Author Posted April 21, 2012 can't change my number yet. will have to wait this out for a bit. no calls from either this weekend. peace and quiet. yay! :bunny: 1
mridul_chajilee Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 Right changing number will solve the problem,but if u can fix without changing ur number it will be better.
Terrorblade Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 I agree she is being selfish - not looking at you, but her son. To her, you were the source of her son's happiness, but she does not realise that the relationship has ended. I'd suggest you be patient (IMHO never disrespect old people) and then change your number. That would be perfect.
Author callmegee Posted April 22, 2012 Author Posted April 22, 2012 Chuckling to myself over the lyrics of this old song: "I want to break free I want to break free I want to break free from your lies You're so self satisfied I don't need you I've got to break free God knows, God knows I want to break free" :laugh::laugh:
immitable Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 (edited) This thread is just sad, full of bitterness and `you go girl' attitudes lead by TaraMaiden. One thing must not be forgotten, the OP is the dumper although she claims the bu was mutual, it is typical for dumpers to feel that the bu was mutual to rid themselves of the guilt. Now the mother of her exbf is calling her which gives her even more power. The poor lady knows her son and she knows her son loves/loved her and that's why she is trying, in her own way to help the situation. One question to you OP, why did you date him if you knew he wasn't the right one for you? Edited April 22, 2012 by immitable
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