buzzie2 Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 It just seems that nowadays a lot of guys do not want anything serious with a girl anymore. The majority of guys I know in their twenties and thirties seem to just want to casually date and sleep with a number of different girls. The most these guys want is a FWB's situation. No one wants a serious, committed relationship anymore. There is no love, only sex. I also notice the respect for women is lacking with these men. To most of them women are just objects, and it's a game to see how fast they can get us in bed. Why is this happening so much? Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 It just seems that nowadays a lot of guys do not want anything serious with a girl anymore. The majority of guys I know in their twenties and thirties seem to just want to casually date and sleep with a number of different girls. The most these guys want is a FWB's situation. No one wants a serious, committed relationship anymore. There is no love, only sex. I also notice the respect for women is lacking with these men. To most of them women are just objects, and it's a game to see how fast they can get us in bed. Why is this happening so much? Because women allow it. And not only that, many seem to prefer it to an actual relationship. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Bob_Funk Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 It's not that guys don't want relationships. It's that, like most girls, you're overestimating you league because anything that moves wants to bang you. Either settle for your male equivalents or continue to get treated like a sperm depository. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ninjainpajamas Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Every other woman desperately wants a relationship....men are turned off by it Every other man desperately wants sex...women are turned off by it I'm going to defend guys a little bit on this one because I think they get blamed for having a boat load of expectations just thrown on their lap... How do you feel when every other guy wants to get in your pants without even getting to know you? How do you think every other guy feels when you want a committed relationship without even knowing him? From a mans perspective It feels like women just want everything from them because of what they want....you want the house, the kids, the idealistic fantasy in your head to come all together. What man wants to just be "that guy"? Just because most women want to settle down and get married does that mean we have to just hop into a relationship with every woman we meet or have sex with? Is that how this is supposed to work? Oh how many know or don't ask what the guy is looking for or he says he's not looking for anything serious...have sex anyway then expect something more? I can't tell you how many women have an idea of what kind of man they want only to fall "in love" with only to fall for a guy that's nothing like it...why? because she wants this future and life, she wants to be loved and accepted so she bends backwards, throws out all her expectations is willing to deal with just about any circumstance because of how "she feels" for him, so what kind of standard is that in the end? How much do you really care about anything else other than your emotions once you develop them? Nothing, anything possible with hope! Men have the same desires and expectations ultimately however they don't fall in love easily and see this grand future with just anyone. They notice the problems and the flaws when they're not completely satisfied and they're not so willing to compromise just because they do have emotions...their problem is they string it out and drag you along...why? usually because the woman does whatever is in her power to keep the relationship together instead of letting him walk away. But women like to make men sign on the dotted line and expect them to fulfill a whole list of expectations because of sex. Women want to give all of their "love" most of the time they sleep with a guy, that's what they're hoping for...then you develop emotions for this guy and all of a sudden he's the "one" when you didn't even really give a damn about the guy 2 days ago because you thought he was a unfit, not your type, had some bad habits you knew you hated, and were incompatible. But then you kissed and had sex and now all of a sudden wow, I like him now! There's no middle ground, It's all or nothing most of the time. God forbid a guy sleeps with you and has a good time with you yet doesn't want to marry you at the end of the day once he's not all that interested because It's not like you really put up a fight in the first place to get to know the guy. So now It's the guys fault that you're having sex with him? I guess you're a victim and can't "help yourself". As man, women want relationships and marriage. As a woman, every guy wants no-strings attached FWB or just plain sex. So men become picky about who they settle down with because they always have the option to settle down since it's available and they wait for the right girl to come along to consider that investment. Women, however, don't tend to be as picky...end up having sex with the guy anyway and then wonder why he doesn't want to stick around. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
manup Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 It just seems that nowadays a lot of guys do not want anything serious with a girl anymore. The majority of guys I know in their twenties and thirties seem to just want to casually date and sleep with a number of different girls. The most these guys want is a FWB's situation. No one wants a serious, committed relationship anymore. There is no love, only sex. I also notice the respect for women is lacking with these men. To most of them women are just objects, and it's a game to see how fast they can get us in bed. Why is this happening so much? If more women had less casual sex this would happen less. It's basic supply and demand. For things to change women would have to start slut shaming again. This of course will never happen. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ascendotum Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Because women allow it. And not only that, many seem to prefer it to an actual relationship. Thats right. I witnessed a conversation between a bunch a women in their 30s on FWBs, and whether they would do them, and as it went round the table all of them said no they wouldn't then a woman said she has and would do it again but only with hunky hot looking guy, and then boom, 3/4s of the table changed their answer to match hers. lol. FWBs are happening a fair bit these days, and with the women I know, its not unattractive women who are desperate. Its almost the opposite, and trust me, guys notice their better looking mates getting it with 'no strings attached', and that flows through the ranks. Link to post Share on other sites
udolipixie Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Same reason why so many gals don't want no strings sex or fwb from a guy. Guys usually get plentiful offers of commitment from gals. It tends to be available on tap. However commitment to many guys is losing freedom for yourself and signing up for a ball and chain. Especially if it's marriage thanks to traditional gender roles in divorce where the women is automatically assumed to be the best caregiver so if there are kids she gets them and the guy is automatically assumed to be the provider so he pays for her and if there's kids for them too. Choosing to commit to the wrong one can be a danger. While sex with various women is often something most guys want specifically young and attractive women. Gals usually get plentiful offers of sex and just sex from guys. It tends to be available on tap. However simply sex tends to many gals is losing respect for yourself and being a slut. Especially as many gals take it as they are unlovable and not gf/wife material. Choosing to have sex with the wrong one can be a danger as in decreasing your value if it's too often. While commitment means love, respect, a serious partner, intimacy something most gals want specifically public recognition in the sense of legal marriage. Essentially it's preferring something else where's there's little risk of choosing the wrong one in their minds to something that is always available. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men do want commitment but we tend to be more pragmatic about it. A woman has to pass all kinds of tests in a man's head before he decides she is relationship material. Most men want with the right woman. On the other hand people have needs and until he finds the one casual sex will do. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SJC2008 Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 They're out there. In my case you wont know because I don't make it past the 3rd date. Every woman I have pursued in my life has rejected me so mabye some women need to learn how to screen better. Link to post Share on other sites
mesmerized Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men simply don't care about women like women care about men. It's usually all about sex...when they get older and can't get sex as easy and their testosterone level drops down (and ofcourse they get closer to death!) is the time that they think about having more stability. Link to post Share on other sites
phineas Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men simply don't care about women like women care about men. It's usually all about sex...when they get older and can't get sex as easy and their testosterone level drops down (and ofcourse they get closer to death!) is the time that they think about having more stability. I'm 40 yrs old. I got it up 3 times last sunday in a 2hr span. Exactly when do the test levels drop for us old guys again? Link to post Share on other sites
fortyninethousand322 Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Because women allow it. And not only that, many seem to prefer it to an actual relationship. This. To be sure though, there will be posters coming in here who will place the blame solely on men. Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Its numerous reasons why they won't commit 1. Women change sometimes after being committed to someone. A person that seems everything you wanted could become an *********. 2. Lack of compromise. There are women that are my way or the highway. Women can talk about men but when something goes wrong they are withholding sex. Look at the threads on here where men love their wives but the wife wont even touch them. 3.Pressure from women. Sometimes pressuring a man to commit will drive them away. I could go on and on. Men want relationships but it hard to know if the person you are with is genuine. This is an issue for men and women. People change once we get comfortable with our SO Link to post Share on other sites
mesmerized Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Its numerous reasons why they won't commit 1. Women change sometimes after being committed to someone. A person that seems everything you wanted could become an *********. 2. Lack of compromise. There are women that are my way or the highway. Women can talk about men but when something goes wrong they are withholding sex. Look at the threads on here where men love their wives but the wife wont even touch them. 3.Pressure from women. Sometimes pressuring a man to commit will drive them away. I could go on and on. Men want relationships but it hard to know if the person you are with is genuine. This is an issue for men and women. People change once we get comfortable with our SO No they don't. Men want sex and if relationship is the way to get it, then they go for relationships. Very few men actually want love and relationships, not the young and attractive ones anyway. It's not until most of their friends are paired up that they start thinking about relationships. Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 No they don't. Men want sex and if relationship is the way to get it, then they go for relationships. Very few men actually want love and relationships, not the young and attractive ones anyway. It's not until most of their friends are paired up that they start thinking about relationships. Still wrong. So you are connected to every man in the world's mind and have the understanding that every single one of us wants sex? I think not. I look at these threads and more women bring up the fact that men want sex than men. It is so funny. Just like women say every woman is different every man is different so the reasons are different. Some of the women on LS love to put all men in this one box like everyone is the same like we are all made at a factory. Newsflash! All men are not like that and when some of the women on here can acknowledge it then maybe they will find someone that will commit to them Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men aren't held responsible for their part in pacing a relationship. If a guy tried to push me for early sex... or even if... god forbid... I HAD early sex with him, it would be the kiss of death for a 'relationship' for me. At least with him. I don't want man-hos and I won't pursue a relationship with a man who thinks I'm a ho either. Which is most men who pursue sex first and think it's a nice girl's job to 'hold out'. Mature people who sincerely want a relationship are responsible with their sexuality. Whether or not they are looking for a commitment. Problem is, some guys thinks he's got the upper hand in deciding who has a relationship and when. They think that they can do all the sexing they want, and that women will have 'em any way they can get 'em. Just isn't true. Also is a problem for men who associate marriage with a ball and chain and financial obligations. IMHO, these same men have a history of taking women for granted. They think that all women who want a committed relationship are just there to take them to the bank. What about women who don't want kids? Or make their own money?? Naa. It's all about people doing whatever they can to get the most of what they want, while minimizing what they don't want. Both men and women do it. Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Funny how women can talk about men on this and never ask themselves what do women do to contribute to men not committing. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Problem is, some guys thinks he's got the upper hand in deciding who has a relationship and when. They think that they can do all the sexing they want, and that women will have 'em any way they can get 'em. Just isn't true. But they can. Not with you, but with other women. I truly believe this is a reason that men are attracted to younger women. They are often less guarded. Younger men are the same. It is no coincidence that they younger men interested in you were willing to chase for so long, while men closer to your age may be more guarded. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men aren't held responsible for their part in pacing a relationship. If a guy tried to push me for early sex... or even if... god forbid... I HAD early sex with him, it would be the kiss of death for a 'relationship' for me. At least with him. I don't want man-hos and I won't pursue a relationship with a man who thinks I'm a ho either. Which is most men who pursue sex first and think it's a nice girl's job to 'hold out'. Mature people who sincerely want a relationship are responsible with their sexuality. Whether or not they are looking for a commitment. Problem is, some guys thinks he's got the upper hand in deciding who has a relationship and when. They think that they can do all the sexing they want, and that women will have 'em any way they can get 'em. Just isn't true. Also is a problem for men who associate marriage with a ball and chain and financial obligations. IMHO, these same men have a history of taking women for granted. They think that all women who want a committed relationship are just there to take them to the bank. What about women who don't want kids? Or make their own money?? Naa. It's all about people doing whatever they can to get the most of what they want, while minimizing what they don't want. Both men and women do it. Men are accountable for pacing in a relationship. Not all men assume women want to take them to the bank. I will say there is in some women a no compromise approach to relationship. I remember a woman I was with came out and said "I'm always right and when I'm wrong I'm right". I responded with a well you a$$ can be right by your damn self. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men think that commitment is unmasculine. They are rewarded for being man-hos. Women are considered weak and needy for wanting commitment, but that is still considered much more attractive than women who have sex like men and put off commitment for their own reasons... For a man who doesn't commit, there are never ending excuses for why it is... but I've discovered it has zero to do with the woman they are with. It has more to do with a man's desire to want to be in a committed relationship to begin with... Not about the woman he comes across. It is BS to think that the woman will magically become someone he will want to commit to. It is true that she may hang around long enough for him to enter a stage of his life where he wants to commit... but again... zero to do with her. More to do with him and his mindset about commitment. Waste of time getting involved with men who aren't looking for a commitment or are wishy-washy about it. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Men are accountable for pacing in a relationship. Not all men assume women want to take them to the bank. I will say there is in some women a no compromise approach to relationship. I remember a woman I was with came out and said "I'm always right and when I'm wrong I'm right". I responded with a well you a$$ can be right by your damn self. That's just snarky and irresponsible on her part. I wouldn't take that kind of behavior from my friends either. Women are jerks too. I get that. Link to post Share on other sites
RedRobin Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 RedRobin's Official Disclaimer Anytime I say 'men'... just replace it with 'some men'. Anytime I say 'women'... just replace it with 'some women'. Some of my best friends are men. I love men. :love: I don't like jerks, and I don't tolerate those who can't communicate or are irresponsible very well. Keeping in mind that all of these descriptions also describe me from time to time. I'm willing to give people the benefit of the doubt for quite awhile... just not in ways that seriously endanger my health or emotional well-being. Link to post Share on other sites
mesmerized Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 Funny how women can talk about men on this and never ask themselves what do women do to contribute to men not committing. The only thing women do to contribute to this is agreeing to have sex with men without commitment. This makes this world heaven for men. They get to live a free life and have sex too without having to go through commitment hassle. Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 That's just snarky and irresponsible on her part. I wouldn't take that kind of behavior from my friends either. Women are jerks too. I get that. If you and the women on here get that then why not acknowledge that women play a part in men not committing. I see here women coming up with the same reasons of why men won't commit and not really acknowledging any other perspectives on the issue Link to post Share on other sites
fortyninethousand322 Posted March 18, 2012 Share Posted March 18, 2012 The men who want commitment are the men women don't really want. The men women really want are the ones who don't want to commit. Simple really. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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