Signals, signals. All about the damn signals.

[befreckled]

I have always multi-dated. It made pretending to be busy alot easier because I truly am busy. Between work, gym, dating a couple people and still keeping my regular social activities, it leaves me little time to think or worry about what the next step is. I am also insanely bad at making sense of signals and hence, this forum has been somewhat of a God send. I can mix and match my experiences, relate and go "damn, he does/does not like me"

 

That said, a couple recent developments has got me abit puzzled.

 

Date A: insanely shy. we have known each other for 2-3 months. there is not a week that goes by that we don't see each other either in a group social setting or alone save for a week that he was out of the country. more often alone than in a group, if it is a group, i usually suggest it. we go for dinners, movies, lunch, drinks and he has never once made a physical move on me. when we first met, i had gone abit far with my gin and tonics and, he might have said that i'm pretty..it's abit fuzzy.

 

more details here:

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t223951/

 

Last week, we met again for a drink over the weekend. There are more incidents of touching, he touches my arm when we talk sometimes which is in line with me thinking that he is shy. He is so much more comfortable now than when we first started going out. Problem? I think I like him enough to want to know if the feeling is mutual, is there a way I can do this? I am not forward sexually and the idea of getting drunk so I can gather some dutch courage does not appeal to me but I'd consider it.

 

Date B: older, wiser, very attractive.

We dated rather intensively for 3-4 weeks and then, work took over and we both started travelling. I asked him out the last time and he has yet to ask me out again. He was in the country for a week last week before flying off again and he didn't ask me out once. Although when he was away, he did take a picture of something that is my nickname and sent it to me.

 

Should I just let this one go? Everything has come to somewhat of a standstill. It could be because, he is insanely busy, or it could well be that he realised that I'm not what he wants. I am still very attracted to him. I wrote him an email, just a casual one and he replied back within the hour with a lengthy email complete with details of when he is going to be back, where is he off to, and when he is heading off again yet no mention of when we could catch up again.. which sorta puzzled me.. If he isn't interested anymore, why is he still replying with such gusto?

 

more here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t223272/

 

Will someone offer some semblence of sanity please?

[boogieboy]

Date A, he's just as confused as you are. Youre at a cowards standstill. He cant read your shyness as bad as you cant read his. So you better make a move before some other women makes a move for you. Sitting back waiting for him to make the move isnt going to work here. The way to find out if he likes you without asking? Try flirting more.

 

And your strategy to multi date to avoid worrying about your dates isnt working, cuz youre here.... worrying about your dates.

 

Date B, back off and let him come after you. He probably wont btw. He's busy. Let him miss you. Do you really want to start a relationship with a guy who is travelling most of the year?