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Keeping abreast of a coworker

Business and Professional Relationships Networking and maintaining a positive environment in the work place is important! Surviving the 9-to-5 within.

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Old 23rd April 2014, 12:12 AM   #31
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TalesoftheWireMonkey's Avatar
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Originally Posted by ja123 View Post
This is a hot story, OP!

I think she is flirting with you, especially as she already mentioned someone else was crowding her personal space.

I also think that she doesn't want the culpability of initiating something, like you explained earlier.

If you really don't want to risk an affair with a married woman (and one that you work with, no less!), then you'll have to find proactive ways to detach yourself emotionally as well as physically. Yes, you do need to step away when she presses her boobs against you.

Remind yourself that if you remain 'attached' to her, then you do not have the 'space' to meet a girlfriend.

Is that what you want?

You'll need to ask yourself why you'd remain attached to her: unavailable emotionally, lack of other opportunity, laziness, fear, etc. etc. Get to the source, and weed it out.

Good luck!
This is a hot story, OP! - I'm glad you are enjoying it. :P
Why I remain attached-I think many of us know the quickest way to end a crush is to get involved with someone else. To have a more tactile and reciprocal relationship.
My issue is that I have sworn off dating and relationships. I don't want someone else and on an intellectual level I don't want her either.
However as stoic and stalwart as I can be it's hard to ignore someone I'm forced to see every day, who's mere presence makes my drab day palatable.

I'm not starry-eyed and have her on a pedestal. Her thinking is convoluted. She's quickly putting on middle-aged spread. Her child is into the most difficult teen age years. Her finances are a mess. I'm a confirmed bachelor, I'm sure even if we could have a relationship it wouldn't go well in the long run.

WHY, you ask then am I so smitten...Alas, that's the great riddle of the ages, why does one become attracted to one person over another? Is it a simple matter of her possessing a set of physical traits that set off triggers in my memory, a pheromone release, just some chemicals squirting in my brain?
Who knows, I just know all is right with the world when she's near me and the sound of her laugh is like a thousand tiny bells ringing in harmony. :-/

(this could be fodder for another thread) I don't want to date someone else just for the sole purpose of getting over this unattainable one. That's not really fair to myself or to my potential date.

then you'll have to find proactive ways to detach yourself emotionally as well as physically.
I've fought this for months, trying to convince myself it was just a passing fancy or lustful moments of weakness. I've tried to curtail the conversations we have, minding my own business and not speaking to her unless she begins a conversation. And yes, standing back enough to be out of her obvious reach.
But you know if you are trying to diet, is there that much difference between holding a cupcake in your hand or having it on the table in front of you?
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