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Should my autistic brother date women who are also autistic or no?

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Old 11th March 2019, 2:39 AM   #61
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Originally Posted by alphamale View Post
assuming he is a virgin the problem with getting him laid (from a sex worker I assume) is that he will see how great sex is and start wanting it all the time. this will cause HUGE problems for you and the family.

I don't even know if an escort/call girl will accept him as a client
Yeah that's true, I wouldn't want him wanting it all the time and make things worse. I didn't mean that if I were to do it, that I would go to a sex worker or prostitute. I thought maybe out of friends, and there circles of friends, maybe there is a woman who would understand the situation and be okay to do it herself, without it being a prostitution situation, if she felt it was going to help (shrug).

Originally Posted by littleblackheart View Post
OP, have you considered forums who are specifically geared towards families dealing with ASD ? They may have good insight into helping you and your parents deal with your brother's specific needs (not just the dating part), or at least offer some support.
Yeah I tried one forum that deals with autism and has autistic members, and there were actually more for the prostitution idea, since they said, sometimes, that's all we get, etc.
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Old 11th March 2019, 5:35 AM   #62
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I meant local forums for parents or family members, not those with autism themselves.

They may have tips for your brother to develop his life skills and social skills.

In any case, 'Getting a gf' won't happen in a vacuum (if it happens at all); he will need to develop some basic life skills and social skills first.

A good mix of well intentioned NT/ASD friends who have done it before and can lead the way could really make a difference (my lovely NT friends and sisters have been invaluable to me).

Basically, he needs his own support system that is not restricted to family.

With that said, society is a lot harsher on men than it is on women, from observation and experience. I don't know if that's bc NT men are less uptight or judgemental as a whole or bc ASD women have more opportunities to learn from a social group, or both.

Anyway. He's lucky to have a supportive brother.
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Old 18th April 2019, 10:32 PM   #63
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I think dating and finding the right person is hard for many people. Instead of having him look for a specific type of person, it's better for him to get involved within his community (jobs, volunteering, workshops, yoga, whatever) so he can meet people in general. Hopefully he'll find someone compatible. If not, unfortunately, this is a reality for many people. He can always build a social circle so he's not feeling so lonely.
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