He wants a break out of the blue

[N2017]

I was with him officially for a month, known him for a couple of years. He's the one who had the idea to become exclusive, and told me that he wouldn't see any girls and didn't want me to talk to other guys unless it was for professional purposes.

 

We're both under 20 and in college and work as student assistants/tutors. My friends and parents do not approve of him for various reasons, and I get their reasons, but for some reason I've had a big soft spot for him (hopefully not anymore lol). Like any two people, we argue about things from time to time, and last week I sort of overreacted at something he said that I guess came out wrong and I didn't talk to him and blocked him on the messaging app for a couple days. It just sounded very rude and insensitive and I was pissed, but I apologized and he clarified what he meant and things went back to normal. He still wanted to make plans to hang out for a couple of days later.

 

That day comes around, and we hung out and did stuff together in the morning, and everything seemed just fine. He seemed happy, I was sleepy but happy. After that we were both in the tutoring center, he was working, I was studying with friends, and I even did something I thought was nice when no one was looking I slipped him a note saying "you're cute", and he laughed and smiled at me. Then, in the afternoon, he is in the class that I assist with. I don't talk to him very much unless he asks me a question because I try to separate whatever is going on between us from the classroom. So I didn't think anything was wrong. But that night I get a text from him telling me that he "wants to take a break" and only wants to talk about work or school. Note that I hadn't said anything to him ever since the morning and I hadn't texted him either. I am also not the type that bombards guys with text messages, I sometimes initiate but I don't text excessively.

 

I just told to enjoy his break. I had to seem him a lot yesterday and I just tried to not look at him. He kept staring at me and coming around where I was (when I was getting water or checking into a school event) but I just tried to avoid him. I don't really know for sure why he would have wanted a break. My only guesses are that

1) He was still pissed about how what happened last week. Which yes, maybe I shouldn't have blocked him but how what he said came across had me considering breaking off the entire relationship. I thought it was resolved but maybe not.

2) I hold 2 hours of tutoring in the classroom after the class. He was there doing his work in the back, and I didn't go over to help him. I was helping this other guy who was not ugly and kept making me laugh for the majority of the session - he had a lot of computer issues and it was taking me a while to figure it out. He has told me in the past that he gets very jealous and I know he doesn't seem to have all that much self esteem because he thinks he's fat and ugly and this and that... So I don't know if he thought I was into the guy or something and got jealous and is just mad? It sort of seems like it, I've had guys in the past act all weird whenever they got jealous.

3) He found someone else and doesn't like me anymore.

 

What do you think? I just need to get other people's thoughts on this because I'm upset. I am going to try to toughen up and not let him back into my life.

[d0nnivain]

Nobody needs time off after a month. This guy doesn't want to date you for whatever reason. There is nothing you can do about that. Muddle through the semester having to deal with him in the tutoring center. To the extent you can change your hours so you are not there when he is.

[ExpatInItaly]

When you need a break after just a month, consider it done for good. That's far too short to already need time apart. He has lost interest but doesn't know how to just tell you it's over.

 

Why doesn't anyone in your life approve of this relationship, and what did he say that angered you so much before? A little context would help posters understand the bigger picture between the two of you.

 

It's not the same guy from this thread, is it?

https://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/661253-ex-signed-up-class-i-assist

Edited September 21, 2018 by ExpatInItaly

[PegNosePete]

didn't want me to talk to other guys unless it was for professional purposes

Seriously? You can't order a coffee from a guy? By the sound of it you dodged a serious bullet there. Guy's a can short of a 6 pack.

 

My friends and parents do not approve of him for various reasons

At your age it's very common to think "I am right and the world is wrong" but as you get more life experience you will learn to value others' opinions. Of course sometimes you really are right and the world really is wrong.. but not often.

 

He is acting like a 12 year old. Even if he does come back after this break, you should tell him to kick rocks, and find someone who knows how to adult a bit better.