If you do anything you are just going to make yourself look bad or immature and that's even worse than if HE was going around saying things to make you look bad. Trust me.........just walk away with your head held high.
Why should you feel the need to exact revenge? If you get involved with someone's husband and you're gullible enough to believe his lies about leaving his wife for you, how you're his soulmate, how he's only staying for the kids, how he's not really having sex with his wife any longer - well, that's a choice you made to believe this hogwash. Nobody forced you to get involved and sleep with another woman's husband, you made that decision of your own free will. You have no right to want revenge. You play with fire, you get burned - deal with it.
A little harsh wyzeup but kinda true. Anyway, I don't think there is any such thing as sweet revenge. I think it just makes the person that seeks it old and bitter. I think the best course of action is to just learn from your mistakes, own them and make sure you never do something like that again.
ww - not to be too personal but aren't you getting married soon. Why the revenge? I would LOVE to know what you did, but you've been such a proponent of when you move on, it's done. What's going on?
To answer... I told xMM that I was going to get him - what comes around, goes around - and I was going to get him. I've thought about how to make his life miserable. How to make him rue the day he ever started all his lies. But then I figure living with his wife or without her, either way, he'll never know the ectasy of being with me again. Of course, neither will I - oooohhhh, there's the rub.... Does it hurt him, or me?
Anyway, I've realized that to go after him makes me look vicious, lonely, obsessed, pining for him. I don't want him to know that I still care. I've made enough NC breaks to humiliate myself. I've begged and pleaded to no avail. It's embarassing how much I want him to be with me.
But, in being in this f*cked up relationship (OW/MM) which has so many cliches it's ridiculous - one cliche must stand out - "the best revenge is to live well." So that's what I will go on. However, I can't say that if the opportunity presents itself and I feel I can walk away still looking good, I will take revenge. I think about it a lot. I used to work for him and am still respected in his workplace. If I can take it without making myself look stupid (ie: any woman is stupid to get involved with a MM) then I will. I want him to pay. Hey, he might be paying with his wife or alleged separation, but I want to see the pain. I want to see him cry the same way I did when he walked out at 5 am.
But as we know, life is not perfect. We don't get what we want...
There's a line in a Sheryl Crow song that says (paraphasing...) It's not getting what you want, it's wanting what you've got" How true.....
I never said I am going to do anything to revenge.
I just asked your opinion.
Mine is:
i barely think of him anymore and this question is not at all about me revenging.
for all of you taht answered with NOTHING ...well u r so right.
Getting the point Curly ?
Originally posted by ww
ok girls . what is the best way to revenge an ex ( MM in our cases ).What do you think? Cuz I think I did it.
I wanna hear your opinions
Quote:
Originally posted by ww
I never said I am going to do anything to revenge.
I just asked your opinion.
Mine is:
i barely think of him anymore and this question is not at all about me revenging.
for all of you taht answered with NOTHING ...well u r so right.
Getting the point Curly ?
You are contradicting yourself...You said above you thought you did it.
If you don't think of him anymore, why pose this question?? Just curious.
Just remember if one goes for revenge - The other party could do some revenge back. IS it really worth it? I think it will just hurt you more than anything and the personal satisifaction of screwing him over isn't worth 10 mins of you feeling good about it...Cuz the next day you gotta look in the mirror and face yourself...And Sleep at night.
Or am i the only one who actually feels bad for my lack of self-control.
Let me just speak for me: I've altered the lives of others, at least temporarily. I've hurt children when their Daddy told them he was in love w/someone other than their Mother. I've cried, he's cried, they've cried.
WTF???? WHAT REVENGE JUSTIFIES MY OWN ACTIONS???
__________________
~Don't treat me any differently than you would the Queen~
For myself, I know I went through a period when I wanted revenge, or shall I say, when I felt that my ex-MM had done things that he deserved to pay for. I realize it's not my place to judge him, or seek revenge on him, but that's how I felt at the time.
I don't feel particularly bad for my lack of self-control. I was naive, perhaps, but I went into this relationship absolutely believing what he told me - that his marriage was ending, that he was in love with me and intended to marry me, and that I had nothing to do with the end of his marriage. Turns out I was wrong, but he lied, and those lies ruined my life for a long time. So for that, I was angry, and as humans, when we are angry, we fantasize about revenge.
Luckily, I never acted upon any of my fantasies, and I got to the place of realizing my happiness and peace inside is what matters to me - and I wish him well.
Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.
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