19 year old guy dating 15 year old girl. We love each other but society says "NO!"
Ok, Im a 19 year old guy currently dating a 15 year old girl. We have been dating for a little under a year now and we are deeply in love and couldnt be happeir with the way things are going. Before we met we both had our opinions on dating. My opinion was u stick with people ur own age because its just wrong dating younger people. And her opinion was that older guys are just looking to get in her pants and arnt looking for a real relationship. Well we had been friends for years and talked occasionally and one day we started talking over the internet as friends and found we had the same interests and we got along great. One thing led to another and we decided we would give dating a try. its been around 10 months now and I can honestly say they have been the best 10 months of my life. We live in Canada and the age of consent is not a problem it is perfectly legal that isnt my problem. we have not had sex yet and my girlfriend is the one wanting to more then me because i feel that she needs to be 100 percent sure she wants to do it before she does. Her mother at first was not ok with it but began to get to know me and is completely ok with it and i come over regularly and visit her mom and her sisters and even take her sisters to the movies for fun time to relieve her mom of some stress. Before we met each other we had failing relationships and now we have been dating, nothing could be better. my problem is my concience. she doesnt look nor act like she is 15 and has been through things in life that even i havnt. these things she has been thorough i believe has made her as mature as she is. she is more mature then half the girls i know my age. but it still bothers me when i think about the age difference. should it bother me considering the way me and my girlfriend are? and is it wrong if we are so happy and at the same level of maturity... and i am mature as well. Im also having a big problem with my friends talking about this behind my back and making fun of the situation. please give me ideas on how i should look past this and what i should do with my friends.
Why does your age difference bother you so much? If you are happy, then nothing else matters. Don't let such a small thing come between yourselves. It is so rare to find someone that you can be happy with... I wouldn't be much concerned about what other people say, either. People will always talk & always have something bad to say. Don't let it affect how you feel.
You said sex hasn't happened yet but I dunno...19 v 15...You *could* stay with her sans the sex untill she hits 18, that'd be alright. Something tells me though neither of you will wait that long
It's human nature. *sigh* the bottom line is if she's of legal age where you live then %^&$ the begrudgers.
The age of consent here is 18 btw & what you're doing would land you a nice jail term & get you registered on the public sex offenders list. Bet you're glad you don't live in Ireland, eh?
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19 and 15? Hmmm....ya'll are better off if it was 24 and 20? Why? well society may not agree because ya'll are still both kids bro.
Think about it, you are ready to settle down because you have 4 years of experience over your girl and your girl is into you now because she is 4 years behind you in experience.
Has she dated anyone else? Age aint nothing but a number but it does amount for life experience.
I dont disagree that you guys love each other, but she's 15-16 dude....she is a baby, there are still things that she needs to experience and the same advice to you too. Dont deny yourselves of opportunites.
I hope that you are the couple that beats all of the doubters but the odds are against you.
My advice is if ya'll truly wanna make a commitment.....learn to communicate to each other.
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i dont see any problem being in a relationship with her although when I was 19 I wouldn't have wanted to be with a 15 year old not because of the age but because of the maturity level. If she is beyond her age in maturity then cool. I will say the odds are that she will not want to be in this one relationship forever but I do know there are cases of people who met at around that age amd got married and all that jazz.
As for the sex stuff, I wouldn't do it until she was older. I realize the age of consent is 14 here in Canada (btw I think that is nuts since 14 is too young) but damn, I wouldn't risk something happening that landed me in jail. Lawyers can be tricky so you never know what they could come up with if somehow you and her had sex and things between you guys went sour. I would wait until she is 18 just to totally cover my ass. Sex isn't worth spending a day in jail let alone a year or more.
Well, the age difference clearly does present problems. I am glad to hear that your families are in contact and have accepted each other and also the relationship. That reduces some possible problems.
I know your 15 yo gf acts mature, but only a 19 yo would think that that indicates actual maturity! You are BOTH still very young. Girls typically do grow up emotionally and psychologically at a younger age than boys do, so it's easy to see why you feel at the same level.
Do you worry about her vulnerability?
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i do worry about her vulnerability, i constantly ask her how she feels about me and us, and im always communicating with her about everything and anything. Its the perfect relationship with the one flaw that is age difference.
Don't let any moralistic B/S bother you, all you should be worried about is how you two will handle this. Personally, like someone else said, I wouldn't be with a girl that young because of maturity issues, but I also understand that some people mature faster than others. You're 19, she's 15. Despite what society says, you're going to have a hard time convincing me that a 19 year old is vastly more mature than and 15 year old.
If I were you, I'd just enjoy the time you have with her for now and not try to look into the future too much. Because, and I know you don't want to hear this, the chances of you finding your soulmate at 19 are SLIM, and the chances of her finding it at 15 is nearly nonexistent. Have fune, but don't look at this like something that's going to stick.
Its only four years. Plus age really is a state of mind. (I personally much prefer dating older men, and I did when I was that age too.) I'm still wondering two things:
1. Why does the age difference bother you so much? is it merely societal influence, or does it go deeper?
2. How does she feel about it? Does it bother her?
answers to ur questions, the age thing bothers me from my peers and family, im constantly being reminded that it is wrong and it wont work out. and she is ok with the age difference, she gets bothered sometimes being told that she is stupid for going out with a 19 year old because all he wants to do is get in ur pants. other then that she is ok with it.
My God thank god for this post ive fallen for a 15 year old im not out to get her for sex at all!!! i just see a great person in her, mature. i am 18 she is 15 and ive really fallen for her badly. talked to her for the first time on sunday thinking she was about 17 or so. anyways im from canada realizing the age of consent is 14, i was told my my life long friend from edmonton that dont date her or her parents and the cops will be on your doorstep soon after dating begins. what should i do???
Hi my name is mike and im in a similat situation that the aruthor of this topic is in. Im in love with this gurl she is 15 im 19. I live in nc usa. I was wondering what the legal daiting age is. Im not in it for sex. Weve dated for 6 months. Her parents have kept us from seeing and talking to eachother. I have the cops watching me. Can any one here tell me what the legal dating age is or how i can find out besides the my local pd or majistrate. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks one more thing can me and her fly to another place like uk or canada and date and be happy? Will i be charged for kidnaping?
Last edited by llvengancell; 10th November 2005 at 3:04 PM..
You put your location as Europe. I am from Ireland, the legal age of sexual consent here is 16. The same as UK and MANY other countries!!! Don't be such an ignorant p**k, and DON'T EVER BELITTLE THE IRISH.
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You are BOTH still very young. Girls typically do grow up emotionally and psychologically at a younger age than boys do, so it's easy to see why you feel at the same level.
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