[ previous thread: He said he loves me..but he's married ]
I don't even know where to begin with this post. We have so much back story. Feel free to skim through my other thread if you want. It's been 4 years of ok again off again affair with MM.
I have broken it off with him a dozen times but he keeps coming back. He swears that he loves me and can't live without me. And promises that we will be together one day.
I've been waiting for what seems like forever and it's killing me!
I have tried dating other guys and it doesn't work. I'm not even remotely interested in anyone else.
I told him last month that it was either me or her. He had to make his choice and I basically wanted all or nothing. He told me he wanted me but to just give him a little bit more time.
After that, I broke down and said I was done. We went NC for a whole month. The longest we've gone without some kind of contact. But he messaged me Friday.
He didn't say much. The message just said "I miss you like crazy. I want to see you".. I stared at it for pretty much the whole weekend, thinking what to say or do. I finally messaged him back but only said I miss you too.
I want to see him too but every time we part ways it's like I'm losing him over and over again.
I don't know what's worse, being with him and still being alone, or not being with him and being even more alone.
I can honestly say that there is no greater feeling of rejection then this. He says he loves me but then doesn't choose me.
He says he doesn't love his wife. But yet he stays....