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New lady I'm seeing wants to borrow money


Easyguy14

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I don't feel too good about this situation. This happened last night when we were cuddling and fooling around in her living room. I met her last week in the parking lot when I helped her get out of a car jam. We went on 2 dates and both were quite interesting. She's a real talker and very outgoing. She's turning 30 next year and is terrified about that. I'll reserve that discussion for another time. Now the thing with said lady about the money is that last night out of the blue she wanted to borrow $100. I was taken back on that. I told her I'll have to see and that's when she ran her mouth on quitting her job as a waitress last month and needs to catch up on a few things and promises to get a new job quickly to pay me back. I wonder if this is because she knows what I do for a living and her mind is racing now? I sure hope not because I'm not an ATM and I don't want what could be just simple dating turn into something crazy. I need to know opinions when it comes to lending money and if this is a relationship killer.

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Nope.

 

Don't do it.

 

2 dates in? Seriously??

 

After a few months perhaps after 2 dates - no.

 

To be honest I have reservations about you continuing to date her - asking to borrow money this soon is well... its too much.

 

Don't do it.

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Easyguy,

No, No, and NO yet again.

 

You haven't even started dating properly and you're thinking about giving her an unsecured loan?

 

She's quit her job and wants money to tide her over until she gets another one? Pah !

 

I smell a rat and it is female and has two legs.

 

Tell her that you are fully committed financially and can't help her - then see how fast she dumps you.

 

And for goodness sake don't have unprotected sex with her, or she'll be getting pregnant and doing you for maintenance.

 

Personally, I'd give this female a miss.

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Gosh that is too fast IMO... Met in a parking lot, oh my! I could never do that, just would scare the living bajezus about of me.

 

Since she said she quit her job, and is low on money, and you're not serious with her at this time. As you should not be. Look at how a woman should be in respecting herself and you. I do not see much of any. I would say no, and see how she reacts. If she likes you she'll figure something out on her own, if not... she'll make you feel bad. That simple.

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I can't imagine having gone on two dates in the span of a week, and then having the audacity to ask the man for money. When someone is that bold, I have to question where they're coming from. This is a red flag for me.

 

You are not in a position to be supporting or trusting someone you met at a parking lot last week.

 

If she had never met you, where would she get the $100? Friends? Family? Maybe she can ask them.

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Say no and stop seeing her. Now especially with OLD, seems like half the people out there are just looking for free money and gifts. She shouldn't be asking you for money. You barely know her. Tell her no and lose her.

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Yikes! No, don't lend her a dime. You two are still complete strangers to each other. It's not normal to ask someone you just started to date, 2 dates in, for money. Like others here have suggested, drop her now. She probably only sees you as her checking account which she plans to take a lot of withdrawls from.

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I can't imagine having gone on two dates in the span of a week, and then having the audacity to ask the man for money. When someone is that bold, I have to question where they're coming from. This is a red flag for me.

 

You are not in a position to be supporting or trusting someone you met at a parking lot last week.

 

If she had never met you, where would she get the $100? Friends? Family? Maybe she can ask them.

 

I appreciate everyone's responses and opinions on the matter and it seems everyone is united on this. I'll take that as a sign for me. The parking lot car jam got things going and since she's like to talk a lot she started asking me stuff and it took off from there. I will definitely put the brakes on this before anything escalates with said lady. I'll tell her I got some bills to pay and don't have anything to lend right now and then I'll try to see if she wants to go out later in the week that wont cost much. I think this is a good test to try out on her. It'll show what her intentions are.

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I think this is a good test to try out on her. It'll show what her intentions are.

Dude she already failed the test, which is to be classy and not ask some dude to borrow money after just 2 dates.

 

She has proven to be financially irresponsible and a liability.

 

Delete, block, no contact, NEXT.

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Yikes! No, don't lend her a dime. You two are still complete strangers to each other. It's not normal to ask someone you just started to date, 2 dates in, for money. Like others here have suggested, drop her now. She probably only sees you as her checking account which she plans to take a lot of withdrawls from.

 

 

This right here papi so don't do it. She a gold digger for real, leave her alone.

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The parking lot car jam got things going and since she's like to talk a lot she started asking me stuff and it took off from there.

 

How does talking a lot justify someone having the gall to ask for stuff/money from someone they barely know?

 

I think this is a good test to try out on her. It'll show what her intentions are.

 

She already failed the test. She is already showing you who she is. Unfortunately, two dates in and you're already finding ways to look past her behavior. Keep going and soon you'll be making excuses for everything she does.

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just no.. please enforce the most run over boundary.. don't lend her any money and dude.. it is a red flag.. no matter how good the story is.

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Why go out with her again? She has already proven herself irresponsible with no boundaries (asking a stranger - which is essentially what you are - for money.)

 

Bad news!

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Why go out with her again? She has already proven herself irresponsible with no boundaries (asking a stranger - which is essentially what you are - for money.)

 

Bad news!

 

 

I think we clicked pretty well on our dates and we both like the same things physically but I haven't slept with her. Is it bad just to see what she does or says after I tell her I don't have anything to lend right now?

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just no.. please enforce the most run over boundary.. don't lend her any money and dude.. it is a red flag.. no matter how good the story is.

Exactly.

 

Where's her family? Why can't she ask a friend?

 

Hmmmmm, maybe because they all know better.

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I think we clicked pretty well on our dates and we both like the same things physically but I haven't slept with her. Is it bad just to see what she does or says after I tell her I don't have anything to lend right now?

 

Two dates and he's clinging just because it clicked. Yes, let's focus on that instead of the red flag slapping you in the face. SMH.

 

Even if you tell her you don't have anything now, isn't the fact that she's asking a bad sign? Why are you ignoring that blatant fact and dancing around it?

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She's on crack, I just know it.

 

Actually she could be on drugs. The guy I met on OLD bragged about his past (or so he says past) drug addictions - including smoking crack - and then he asked me if he could borrow another $5 for a second coffee on our coffee date. I said "no!" of course and ended the coffee date after. Awkward! Like Forest Gump, I immediately ran miles away from OLD guy despite his "good story" of being a divorced widower.

 

OP, just because it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, doesn't actually mean it IS a duck. That OLD guy I mention wrote up a normal dating profile for himself (IT work, 2 kids) but in reality he's a total trainwreck. Not dateable until he gets his act together (which is unlikely).

 

Have your dating standards fallen like the Dow Jones on a bad trade day? Of course it's bad to see how she reacts after you tell her you don't have any money to lend. Why would you even do that, when you already know deep down how she'll likely react (a tantrum possibly). That's like poking a hornet's nest out of boredom. Don't do it. Just drop her and sign up for OLD and find a woman with a real job instead.

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I don't feel too good about this situation. This happened last night when we were cuddling and fooling around in her living room. I met her last week in the parking lot when I helped her get out of a car jam. We went on 2 dates and both were quite interesting. She's a real talker and very outgoing. She's turning 30 next year and is terrified about that. I'll reserve that discussion for another time. Now the thing with said lady about the money is that last night out of the blue she wanted to borrow $100. I was taken back on that. I told her I'll have to see and that's when she ran her mouth on quitting her job as a waitress last month and needs to catch up on a few things and promises to get a new job quickly to pay me back. I wonder if this is because she knows what I do for a living and her mind is racing now? I sure hope not because I'm not an ATM and I don't want what could be just simple dating turn into something crazy. I need to know opinions when it comes to lending money and if this is a relationship killer.

 

You guys aren't even in a relationship...you met her LAST week.

 

To me this is a HUGE red flag.

 

I've NEVER asked to borrow money from boyfriends personally, much less a man I've been on 2 dates with! If I needed money I'd prefer to ask my parents or friends before asking a new boyfriend or a man I went out with twice. What would she have done before she met you??? :confused: I think this is VERY fishy and doesn't bode well.

 

It would probably take me a long time to ever ask to borrow money from a boyfriend...except the odd $5 bucks or something. Lending money can be a big issue in relationships but again...this is NOT a relationship, she is almost a stranger. You are NOT obligated to lend her money and the fact she feels so comfy asking should be a red flag to you IMO.

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